cry as Mark pulls me in tighter and then I feel Gary coming in to hug as well. We all just hold each other, in silence, as Sara’s body lies by our feet.
Then, we hear them. Zombies coming our way. There aren’t three or four or even ten. We see twenty or thirty.
“Oh my God,” I say. “We’ve got to move Sara.”
“No! There are too many. Run!” says Gary.
“Come on, Jen. Let’s move!” says Mark.
We run out of the woods. I don’t look back. I can’t look back.
We bang the motel room’s door, and Bill lets us in. Then I fall on a bed, unable to move or breathe. We’ve lost three people to this horrible mess. I don’t think I can take losing any more.
“Where’s Sara?” screams Katie.
“She’s dead,” says Gary.
Katie starts to cry and falls next to me on the bed. We hold each other tight.
17.
WE’RE BACK ON THE ROAD. Mark is driving and I’m up front with him, but we’re not speaking. Nobody in the van is.
It doesn’t surprise me that Sara took her own life. I imagine we’ve all felt like killing ourselves. Depression can ruin a person’s body and soul, especially if the person is as fragile as Sara was.
I look behind me at Bill. He’s sitting back, relaxed, writing in a crossword puzzle. We’ve just met him, but I know the situation we’re all in has gotten to him as well. Yet, he seems to be doing what he can to calm his nerves.
Katie has never been one to hide her emotions. She’s been crying most of the trip. I don’t blame her.
But it’s Gary who has changed. Now he’s calm, quiet, a man beaten by all this, whether he has admitted it to himself or not. His callous attitude and grins are gone, and he looks human.
Mark pulls the van over to the side of the road so we can pee. I don’t need to go and neither does Katie. Mark, Bill, and Gary pee and then after Gary finishes, he leans against the side of the van to smoke a cigarette.
I leave the van to go talk to him. “Hi.”
“Hey,” he says.
“How are you?”
“I’m good.” He doesn’t look at me.
I bump him. “You sure about that?”
This time, Gary does look at me. He tries to smile, but then he brings a finger to his eye and wipes it. “It’s crazy, you know? It just goes on and on.”
“Yeah, I know.” Tears well in my eyes as well. “Just think about Texas and how great it’s gonna be over there.”
“He’s got you buying that shit too, huh?”
I’m not mad at Gary for saying it. I’ve tried not to question Mark’s plan, but my skepticism is still there. “Well, I have to hope the place is gonna be okay. Otherwise, I guess we’ll have to go find a camp to live in.”
“Nah, screw that.”
“Yeah, I guess the camps are not the best places to be.”
“I lived in one for a month, over in Indiana.” He looks at me. “You ever been to prison?”
I laugh. “No.”
“A camp is just another prison. Just another overcrowded prison.”
“They seem scary to me.”
“A girl like you would have a hard time there.” Gary looks me up and down. “Yeah, that’s for sure.”
I hate when Gary inspects me, but I’m trying hard to like him.
“No, once we get to Texas, I’ll go out on my own. Go find me someplace to hole up and some woman to hole up with.”
I laugh. “You got it all figured out, huh?”
“You gonna stay with Mark? Be his woman?”
You’d have to be blind not to know that Mark and I like each other. “Yeah, I’m staying with Mark.”
“So what you gonna do with dipshit and the old man?” Gary takes another smoke. “‘Cause they’re not coming with me.”
“Katie and Bill can stay with Mark and me. Lord knows Katie can’t make it on her own. I would hate for anything to happen to her. And obviously, Bill needs us as well.”
Mark walks over to Gary and me. “You folks ready? We need to get moving.”
“Yep, we’re ready.” It occurs to me that the entire time I’m talking to Gary, I don’t even think about zombies. Even though I
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