Read Online An Evening with Johnners by Brian Johnston - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Brian Johnston
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wouldn’t pass the Factory Act. They’re very hot and stuffy and crowded, and yet I’ve never seen a single quarrel in one for forty-eight summers and I’ve never had one.Which is remarkable because we’re all extroverts – you’ve got to be to be a commentator – and we’re all different.
Of course, the commentary boxes aren’t made much better by old Fred [Trueman] arriving in the morning, smoking an enormous pipe. He fills the box with tobacco smoke! It’s a bit better after lunch because he goes round the boxes and has lunch with various people and he always comes back smoking a cigar. We always say his cigars are Adam & Eve cigars – when he’s ’ad ’em, we ’eave!
B ut the great thing is, we do have fun, and we hope we get that fun through the microphone. You can’t do this without wonderful people in the box, and I’ll tell you about one or two of them.
Sadly we have lost two very important ones, but one’s still going strong – the great Jim Swanton, who, as you know, commentated before the war and even went out to South Africa and did a commentary on the Test match there. Jim was a marvellous commentator on both radio and on television and a great summariser, on television especially. Of course, he’s written for years for the Cricketer and the Daily Telegraph and he still writes.
So he’s in great form, in his mid-eighties, and he still plays the odd round of golf. His ambition was to be a Second World War golfer – out in thirty-nine, back in forty-five!
On tours, though, he was a bit pompous. He used to stay with Governor Generals and arrive at the ground with a flag on the car! In fact, when he was on Desert Island Discs , Roy Plomley said, ‘Mr Swanton, how do you think you would cope with being on a desert island?’
And Jim said, ‘It depends who the Governor General was!’
He’s a great talker, and I rang up his wife the other day and said, ‘How’s Jim?’
She said, ‘I haven’t spoken to him for about three and a half days.’
‘Really,’ I said, ‘has he been away?’
‘No,’ she said, ‘I didn’t like to interrupt!’
He was always very keen on the differential between the amateur and the professional. He thought it was a good thing. But I think he carried it a bit far when he refused to drive in the same car as his chauffeur!
We used to pull Jim Swanton’s leg unmercifully. I’ll just give you two examples.
One happened at Canterbury in 1963, when Colin Cowdrey had hurt his wrist at Lord’s and was helping us with the commentary. Peter Richardson was captaining Kent and we arranged with him to pull Mr Swanton’s leg.Jim’s got quite a deep voice, so we said, ‘When we start batting in the morning, and Mr Swanton comes on, we’ll wave a handkerchief from on top of our scaffolding.’
So this happened and I was doing the commentary and said, ‘I see Peter Richardson is just going up to speak to the umpire. I’ll hand over now to Jim Swanton.’
And Jim said, ‘Well, I don’t know what’s going on. He’s pointing towards us. It’s probably some small boys playing down below. Quite right!’
By arrangement with us, Peter spoke to Bill Copson, the umpire, who then walked towards us. When he was about fifty yards from our scaffolding, he cupped his hands and said, ‘Will you stop that booming noise up there. It’s putting the batsmen off!’
Of course, Colin said, ‘I didn’t quite hear that, Bill. Could you say it again?’ Poor old Jim!
A nd the other one was also in the same year, just before that, in 1963 at that wonderful match against the West Indies at Lord’s. Do you remember? Colin came in at number eleven, his wrist in plaster, two balls to go and six runs to win, and with David Allen at the other end. It was a draw, but it was a great match.
Before it started, Jim and I were doing the television and we were told, ‘There’s ten thousand people in StPeter’s Square, waiting for that white puff of smoke to come out of the
Of course, the commentary boxes aren’t made much better by old Fred [Trueman] arriving in the morning, smoking an enormous pipe. He fills the box with tobacco smoke! It’s a bit better after lunch because he goes round the boxes and has lunch with various people and he always comes back smoking a cigar. We always say his cigars are Adam & Eve cigars – when he’s ’ad ’em, we ’eave!
B ut the great thing is, we do have fun, and we hope we get that fun through the microphone. You can’t do this without wonderful people in the box, and I’ll tell you about one or two of them.
Sadly we have lost two very important ones, but one’s still going strong – the great Jim Swanton, who, as you know, commentated before the war and even went out to South Africa and did a commentary on the Test match there. Jim was a marvellous commentator on both radio and on television and a great summariser, on television especially. Of course, he’s written for years for the Cricketer and the Daily Telegraph and he still writes.
So he’s in great form, in his mid-eighties, and he still plays the odd round of golf. His ambition was to be a Second World War golfer – out in thirty-nine, back in forty-five!
On tours, though, he was a bit pompous. He used to stay with Governor Generals and arrive at the ground with a flag on the car! In fact, when he was on Desert Island Discs , Roy Plomley said, ‘Mr Swanton, how do you think you would cope with being on a desert island?’
And Jim said, ‘It depends who the Governor General was!’
He’s a great talker, and I rang up his wife the other day and said, ‘How’s Jim?’
She said, ‘I haven’t spoken to him for about three and a half days.’
‘Really,’ I said, ‘has he been away?’
‘No,’ she said, ‘I didn’t like to interrupt!’
He was always very keen on the differential between the amateur and the professional. He thought it was a good thing. But I think he carried it a bit far when he refused to drive in the same car as his chauffeur!
We used to pull Jim Swanton’s leg unmercifully. I’ll just give you two examples.
One happened at Canterbury in 1963, when Colin Cowdrey had hurt his wrist at Lord’s and was helping us with the commentary. Peter Richardson was captaining Kent and we arranged with him to pull Mr Swanton’s leg.Jim’s got quite a deep voice, so we said, ‘When we start batting in the morning, and Mr Swanton comes on, we’ll wave a handkerchief from on top of our scaffolding.’
So this happened and I was doing the commentary and said, ‘I see Peter Richardson is just going up to speak to the umpire. I’ll hand over now to Jim Swanton.’
And Jim said, ‘Well, I don’t know what’s going on. He’s pointing towards us. It’s probably some small boys playing down below. Quite right!’
By arrangement with us, Peter spoke to Bill Copson, the umpire, who then walked towards us. When he was about fifty yards from our scaffolding, he cupped his hands and said, ‘Will you stop that booming noise up there. It’s putting the batsmen off!’
Of course, Colin said, ‘I didn’t quite hear that, Bill. Could you say it again?’ Poor old Jim!
A nd the other one was also in the same year, just before that, in 1963 at that wonderful match against the West Indies at Lord’s. Do you remember? Colin came in at number eleven, his wrist in plaster, two balls to go and six runs to win, and with David Allen at the other end. It was a draw, but it was a great match.
Before it started, Jim and I were doing the television and we were told, ‘There’s ten thousand people in StPeter’s Square, waiting for that white puff of smoke to come out of the
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