Read Online Amnesia Moon by Jonathan Lethem - Free Book Online

who don’t make sense.”
    â€œThen what’s Elaine scared of? If I don’t make sense, why am I such a threat?”
    â€œElaine’s not scared,” said the psychiatrist. “She’s angry.
I’m
scared. You’re a mistake, you’re somebody’s terrible mistake, whatever else you may think you are, and you have to go away. Back to the horrible place you came from, the place in the dream.”
    â€œI’ll go,” said Chaos, “but I’m not going back there.”
    â€œIt doesn’t matter. You’ll probably disappear as soon as we forget you.”
    Chaos was getting impatient with the conversation. “You don’t have to live like this, you know. Groping around in a blind fog.”
    â€œI don’t,” said the psychiatrist. “I work for White Walnut. But even if I didn’t, I’d rather live in the green than like some smelly, rabid animal.”
    Chaos turned back and found the tree where Melinda stood waiting, her hand on the rope. “I’m just trying to say it isn’t necessary. You ought to tell that to Elaine.”
    â€œI beg your pardon, my unpleasant little friend,” said the psychiatrist, clicking his keys in the lock, “but Elaine doesn’t listen to voices in dreams. She
originates
them.” The airlock hissed. “Goodnight.”

 
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    They walked all night. First, led by the guide ropes, into town, then through it, to the highway. They didn’t run into any people, but a stray dog picked up their scent as they came down the hill, and accompanied them through town, trotting invisibly behind them in the green, sniffing at their heels, finally turning away at the highway. The guide ropes stopped at an abandoned gas station. They felt their way past the buildings and up the entrance ramp. Up on the highway, out of the cover of trees, the sounds of chirping insects died away and the air grew cold. They crossed to the grassy divider and headed into the wind.
    They walked out of the green just a little before dawn. The opaque mist suddenly yielded hints of depth; they raised their hands and wiggled their fingers in the fog. In another minute they turned and looked at each other and smiled. Then the stars appeared.
    Soon the dark mountains ahead of them began to glow. They turned and watched as the sun crept up through the mist behind them. They walked a bit farther, then stopped and sat in the grass and watched, entranced, grateful. He was Chaos again, but part of him—however crazy this was—hadn’t seen the sunrise in years.
    Afterwards he got up to walk, but the girl had fallen asleep in the tall grass of the divider. He lifted her and carried her across the highway to a dry spot under some bushes and out of the sun. He sat down in the grass a few feet from her, in a place where he could keep an eye on her and also watch the highway.
    He thought about Elaine. He had a feeling she would take her psychiatrist’s advice and forget about him and Melinda, write the whole thing off as an aberration. He thought about Kellogg’s dreams, about the way he seemed to serve as a kind of antenna for them, and how he’d walked into that town and become Moon, but it didn’t get him anywhere, and he let it go.
    For the moment, anyway, he had other things to worry about, like food and water. Here in the mountains there should be a creek, but he hadn’t seen one yet. There wasn’t any wildlife on the road, either. To eat they’d probably have to go into the next town, wherever that was. And he was beginning to think that towns were bad news.
    He stared at the empty highway for a while, and then, feeling that he should do something, walked in the other direction, through waist-high grass, looking for water. He didn’t find any. He thought of his room in the Multiplex and cursed himself for having left. He wanted to be back there, not here, confused and