Read Online A Cowboy for Christmas by Lori Wilde - Free Book Online

during his training at Fort Leonard Wood in Waynesville, Missouri, and when he returned, he’d proposed. Giddy at having snagged herself a handsome cowboy, she’d accepted. He’d been assigned to Fort Hood in Killeen and whenever he got leave, he would drive up to see her. He was exciting and cowboy-staunch. He made her feel special. She wasn’t around him enough to see the chinks in his armor until it was too late. They married after having known each other less than three months.
    Their wedding took place at the Hyatt Regency where they’d met. Not long after that he was sent to the Middle East. Lissette had been willing to stay in Killeen while he was gone, but Jake had said, “You’re too special for that. We’ll buy a house in my hometown. Jubilee’s halfway between Killeen and Dallas, and my mother will be there to help you get settled in.”
    On one level, she’d liked living in Jubilee. It was an interesting town. She got along well with her mother-in-law and she quickly made friends, but because she had not lived on base, she missed out on the military culture. She’d never become part of the close-knit group of army wives.
    Now, she wondered if there had been another reason Jake hadn’t wanted her to stay in military housing. Had he believed she was too fragile for it? That she couldn’t handle the pressure? But she knew she was stronger than most people believed her to be.
    Kyle was lying on his back, his eyes closed. He looked so peaceful. Her heart tugged. Was she being stupid by turning down the money? Yes, it might be nice to make it on her own, but Kyle’s well-being was more important than her pride. She should be grateful that Rafferty was an ethical person.
    God, she hated feeling like this. Vulnerable. Wounded. She knotted her fists, channeling the helplessness to anger. Determined to fight back. She might be down, but she damn well wasn’t out.
    A photograph of Jake sat on the dresser. She crossed the room to pick it up. She’d taken it not long before Jake’s last deployment. It had been in the late spring, the mimosa trees blooming in an ecstasy of sweet pink. In the picture, her husband was pushing Kyle on a park swing. Her son’s head was thrown back and he was laughing gleefully. Happy. Kyle had been happy.
    Too bad that she and Jake had not. She’d stayed in the crumbling marriage for the sake of her son.
    Lissette pulled her bottom lip up between her teeth and traced an index finger over Jake’s face. The expression was one she’d seen many times. A smile tinged his lips, but there was no joy in it. Smiling simply because he thought it was expected of him—a man playing the role of father, but not really feeling it.
    Until now, she’d accepted the false smile. Pretended she hadn’t seen the emptiness in his eyes. But she could no longer deny it. Jake had been haunted. He’d never been the same after going over there. And then to get himself killed while willingly disobeying orders. Saving those orphans had been heroic and she would never take that last unselfish act from his memory, but she had to wonder about his deeper motivation. Had he subconsciously harbored a death wish?
    What had he seen? What had he done? How much darkness had he hidden from her?
    She’d asked these questions of herself before, but she’d been too scared to ask the questions of him. In all honesty, she hadn’t wanted to hear the answers.
    No rocking Lissy’s safe little world.
    Well, Jake had rocked it to the core and the aftershocks were still coming.
    And now there was Kyle’s diagnosis. This was one truth she would not, could not run from.
    She might not be able to change circumstances and she couldn’t undo the past, but there was one thing she could do. Make the best possible future available to her son.
    And in order to do that, she needed money. No more wasting time. She had to start putting