Z-Burbia 3: Estate Of The Dead

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Authors: Jake Bible
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God, her eyes. I’ve never seen more pain in my life.
    And that’s saying a lot.
    “I got it,” I say , “go with the others.”
    “No,” she says as she shoves the blade in my hand and stands up, her other blade drawn. “They pay.”
    I don’t need the blade, since Stumpageddon is in Mr. Spikey drag and all, and I try to hand it back, but she’s gone.
    “El! No!” I yell as she runs towards the herd of Zs. “God DAMMIT! COME BACK!”
    But she doesn’t come back. She dives into the herd and all I see is black blood and chaos. Limbs start flying everywhere, heads shooting up into the air, the moans of the Zs turn into a herd-wide guttural roar.
    There’s nothing I can do.
    I take El’s blade and make good on her final request. I plunge the steel deep into Julio’s brain. Blood gushes out around the metal and onto my hand.
    “Goodbye, man,” I say , “you will be missed.”
    Wiping the blade on my jeans, I slide it into my belt, stand up, turn, and look at the herd coming towards me. I can see the swath of destruction Elsbeth is wreaking on the Zs, but I can’t see Elsbeth. She’s lost in the death. I almost wonder if she hasn’t always been.
    “El!” I shout, but regret it as the front wave of Zs turn their attention away from the mad canny and on me. “Oh…poop.”
    This isn’t the point where I dive in after her. This isn’t the point where I say, “Fuck it” and sacrifice myself in one big, last blaze of glory. No, I’m not that guy.
    I turn and sprint towards the drainage ditch, leaping over the curb and coming down hard on the side of the hill. My feet almost go out from under me, but I manage a controlled slide down to the truck.
    Everyone’s gone. The truck is empty. No people and no gear.
    “Shit,” I say as I push forward towards the estate.
    I shove past small pines and thorny underbrush. Which brings me to one of my pet peeves about North Carolina: why the fuck does every fucking bush have to have giant, fucking thorns? What’s with this state? We have pitcher plants and Venus flytraps that are fucking carnivorous. And every last bush has thorns on it. It’s like we’re one nuclear radiation accident away from a plant uprising. It’s totally messed up.
    Said despised thorns tear at my clothes and my skin, leaving me slashed and cut to shit by the time I break free of the grove of pines and find everyone else.
    And, oh look, they have found some folks too.
    “Where’s our sister?” A tall, lanky brunette with a nasty scar across her forehead asks me as she shoves past my people. “Did you leave her?”
    “I…uh…she…well,” I stammer , “who are you?”
    “Doesn’t matter,” the young woman says , “where is she?”
    I nod back over my shoulder. “She wouldn’t come with me,” I say. “She just went nuts and decided to take on the whole herd.”
    “Fucking A,” Stuart says.
    “You didn’t even try to stop her?” Brenda asks. Guess she has her bitch iness back.
    “Are you fucking kidding me?” I snap. “I couldn’t stop her anymore than I can stop that fucking herd!”
    “Stacy, Lacy, Tracy,” the brunette orders, “with me. Antoinette, Belinda, stay here and watch the people. If we don’t come back…kill them. They left our sister.”
    “Whoa, whoa, whoa,” I say as the brunette, and who I assume are Stacy, Tracy, and Lacy, run into the pine grove and up the hill. “Hold on!”
    I don’t know why, but I follow. Back into the fucking thorns. Fucking. Thorns.
    “Wait!” I yell. They don’t.
    They’re past the truck and running straight up the hill. No slipping, no stumbling, no hesitation. Their legs and arms pump and before I’m at the truck they are out of sight, up over the curb.
    I have to go hand over spike to keep myself from slipping back down, but I finally make it. And pretty much shit my pants.
    There’s nothing but Zs before me. And they are fucking close. Lik e clos e close. Reach out and touch someone close. But that’s not

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