Read Online Yearnings: A Paranormal Romance Box Set by Amber Scott, Carolyn McCray - Free Book Online
Authors: Amber Scott, Carolyn McCray
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cream. Not life and death.
Why did she keep hoping Elijah was here? Him following her, whispering her name? But the whisper wasn’t his deep, melodic tone. Which she would recognize? Sheesh. Talk about obsessed. If Elijah was following her, she should be scared, not excited! She should not want to ever see him again. He’d given her the rudest look she’d ever seen, let alone received. Her old self would never have allowed such a look. Not without verbally smacking the giver’s ego flat on its ass.
She yanked open a freezer door and grabbed Chunky Husband or something to that effect. She navigated to the self-checkout cash register and did not look behind her, though she swore she had heard it again. “Sadie.” This time in his voice.
If her brain collapsed after all, how long did she have? Another hospital stay, a new arsenal of medications, tweaked to establish that perfect combination that buried who she was completely. Starting all over. She didn't want to start over. Worse, what if it meant her sister and the doctors were right? What if this wasn’t her brain adjusting to being free of chemicals? White walls and squeaking nurses, a void of numb days and nights for the rest of her mindless existence. Nice, tidy hell.
Just like her mother's.
The checkout machine blipped and beeped at her like she was any ordinary person. She felt people staring at her. She wanted to yell out at someone. As though everyone was in on an elaborate joke. At least the scanner wasn't in on it. It took her money, spit out a receipt and thanked her.
“ Sadie, wait.” Elijah's voice, soft and somewhere in the distance. Sadie ignored it. She scanned the store for glimpses of dark hair, his signature dark jacket, deep slits up the back.
Longing for the sight of his face swelled through her.
The only black was a magazine rack. Gum was on sale. She left, grateful for the concealing growing darkness. The autumn air smelled like rain. Sadie breathed it in, fighting to steady her rabid heartbeat. It must be raining somewhere close. Arizona storms moved with unpredictable force, a life of their own. Perhaps the rain would follow her and wash away her fears.
She twisted the bag dangling from her wrist and walked. Heading south, she had three blocks to cover in her sister's quiet suburban neighborhood. Tree lined streets, gas lamp style lampposts. Not a cactus or palm tree in sight. She felt transported. How oddly lucky that the bus route brought her so close. Heather and Remy’s last home, an apartment, had to be driven to. Heather would pick her up, drop her off.
The darkening night cloaked her, making her feel free and invisible. Normal people took for granted how freeing blending in could be. Sadie certainly had back then, two years, which now felt like a lifetime, ago. Sometimes, she doubted her memories of before were real. Graduating high school, going to clubs with Jen, cramming for a test an hour before class, all seemed like fantasies now.
And Elijah seemed real.
She had lived through seven days without seeing him. She couldn’t be certain if he had or had not been there on any of her scheduled days. Progress. Soon, it would get easier. If it didn’t, well, she doubted she had more than a handful of months to suffer getting past her crush .
Once again, the question loomed: If she didn't have much time left of this near normal, what was it she meant to make of it?
One thing for certain, she would take Jen up on her next offer for any normal social function, be it coffee and donuts or a rave. She would keep her sister in the dark for as long as possible, she would buy new clothes and cut her hair. She would do the things she missed most about the normal days.
Somewhere nearby, a dog barked. Sadie jerked, hurrying across the empty street. She inhaled the scent of wetness in the air, closed her eyes against the breeze so she could feel it on her eyelids. Let there be rain.
Tonight’s dinner would be nice. She would do
Why did she keep hoping Elijah was here? Him following her, whispering her name? But the whisper wasn’t his deep, melodic tone. Which she would recognize? Sheesh. Talk about obsessed. If Elijah was following her, she should be scared, not excited! She should not want to ever see him again. He’d given her the rudest look she’d ever seen, let alone received. Her old self would never have allowed such a look. Not without verbally smacking the giver’s ego flat on its ass.
She yanked open a freezer door and grabbed Chunky Husband or something to that effect. She navigated to the self-checkout cash register and did not look behind her, though she swore she had heard it again. “Sadie.” This time in his voice.
If her brain collapsed after all, how long did she have? Another hospital stay, a new arsenal of medications, tweaked to establish that perfect combination that buried who she was completely. Starting all over. She didn't want to start over. Worse, what if it meant her sister and the doctors were right? What if this wasn’t her brain adjusting to being free of chemicals? White walls and squeaking nurses, a void of numb days and nights for the rest of her mindless existence. Nice, tidy hell.
Just like her mother's.
The checkout machine blipped and beeped at her like she was any ordinary person. She felt people staring at her. She wanted to yell out at someone. As though everyone was in on an elaborate joke. At least the scanner wasn't in on it. It took her money, spit out a receipt and thanked her.
“ Sadie, wait.” Elijah's voice, soft and somewhere in the distance. Sadie ignored it. She scanned the store for glimpses of dark hair, his signature dark jacket, deep slits up the back.
Longing for the sight of his face swelled through her.
The only black was a magazine rack. Gum was on sale. She left, grateful for the concealing growing darkness. The autumn air smelled like rain. Sadie breathed it in, fighting to steady her rabid heartbeat. It must be raining somewhere close. Arizona storms moved with unpredictable force, a life of their own. Perhaps the rain would follow her and wash away her fears.
She twisted the bag dangling from her wrist and walked. Heading south, she had three blocks to cover in her sister's quiet suburban neighborhood. Tree lined streets, gas lamp style lampposts. Not a cactus or palm tree in sight. She felt transported. How oddly lucky that the bus route brought her so close. Heather and Remy’s last home, an apartment, had to be driven to. Heather would pick her up, drop her off.
The darkening night cloaked her, making her feel free and invisible. Normal people took for granted how freeing blending in could be. Sadie certainly had back then, two years, which now felt like a lifetime, ago. Sometimes, she doubted her memories of before were real. Graduating high school, going to clubs with Jen, cramming for a test an hour before class, all seemed like fantasies now.
And Elijah seemed real.
She had lived through seven days without seeing him. She couldn’t be certain if he had or had not been there on any of her scheduled days. Progress. Soon, it would get easier. If it didn’t, well, she doubted she had more than a handful of months to suffer getting past her crush .
Once again, the question loomed: If she didn't have much time left of this near normal, what was it she meant to make of it?
One thing for certain, she would take Jen up on her next offer for any normal social function, be it coffee and donuts or a rave. She would keep her sister in the dark for as long as possible, she would buy new clothes and cut her hair. She would do the things she missed most about the normal days.
Somewhere nearby, a dog barked. Sadie jerked, hurrying across the empty street. She inhaled the scent of wetness in the air, closed her eyes against the breeze so she could feel it on her eyelids. Let there be rain.
Tonight’s dinner would be nice. She would do
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