Wolf on the Road
agreement.
    The diminutive ball of anger stuffed her fists into her hips and stomped her feet one after another, throwing a nearly adorable temper tantrum that made her seem more silly than terrifying. It really took Mali a lot of concentration to remember they were being held captive, and no matter how bizarre their captor looked, she was clearly dangerous, and they were clearly not in a very good way.
    “I said I’m not finished !” she said. “And since your brother, the alpha, is going to want to protect you from the law, he’ll happily pay me a shit load of money and let me steal the town helicopter to get away and start a new life somewhere else. Somewhere no one has heard of Petunia Lewis.” She started to stare off into space as though in a daydream. “Nothing will chase me, nothing will stop me, and I’ll get to sit around my new house, which will be underground by the way, because this is really nice and the power bills are almost nothing since it stays right at sixty-five all year around and... say, you have some really nice arms.”
    Jake went to rub his head, but had apparently forgotten the chains binding his arms. They clattered again, Petunia laughed in a snorty, seal-like kind of way. She hopped up on one foot, then the next. One after another, she hoped from toe to toe, clapping as she did. “I’m a goddamn genius!” she cried out a few moments later. “But you do have really nice arms. Too bad they’re chained up, huh?”
    “Want me to pose for you?” Jake asked. He shot Mali a brief gaze that she only caught because she was staring straight at him. “I mean, you seem kinda lonely. Petunia, right? That’s what you said?”
    “I’m not lonely,” she snapped. “I’m tired of being haunted by what I did in the past. So what, I murdered some vegetables and almost flooded out the town. I did my time, baby, I did it all. Sort of. Actually, I didn’t, but I behaved really well so they let me out. They kept telling me I was crazy but I’m not. See? Do I seem crazy to you?”
    Jake looked at her for a second, and then shot a glance at Mali. He shook his head, wisely. “Not at all,” he said. “Seems like you just know what you want, and you really like my arms.”
    Petunia cackled excitedly. “See?” she asked as she slapped Jimmy right in the stomach. “He gets it! There’s nothing wrong with me. I’m not crazy! I’m not! It feels like it’s been forever since someone realized that. Thank you, Jake,” she said with a grin, as she languidly lay against the door. “You’re a real gentleman, you know?”
    “So I hear,” he said. “So, posing? Want to see some real muscles?”
    Mali could hardly contain herself, but as she watched, she saw Petunia start to twitch. It was almost like she realized something not quite to her liking was about to happen. At the same time, she couldn’t control her desire to see said posing, and was just about to let him semi-free when Jimmy, the enormous biker werewolf, grabbed her shoulders. “He’s trickin’ you,” he said in his slow, slightly slurred drawl. “He ain’t tellin’ the truth.”
    “Don’t you think I realize that?” she asked. “How stupid do you think I am? Do you think I care that he’s trying to trick me? He’s in a damn cage! And look at those arms, for god’s sake!”
    Jimmy, for his part, just shook his head. “I don’t... I don’t know about all this.”
    “Shut up!” Petunia screeched. “Just shut up! There isn’t anything you can do to stop me! We’ve got them caught, we have everything I want, what the hell’s wrong with getting a little show on top of it?” She was getting so excited that she was hopping, once again, from one foot to the other, and hardly managing to keep herself from waving her arms around. After the hopping, she started squealing again, and then chewing on her fingernails. After the fingernail snack, the diminutive Napoleon began rocking back on her heels.
    “This is so good!”

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