Read Online Wild Swans by Jessica Spotswood - Free Book Online Page A

calls his gender expression . Abby’s dad, not so much. Abby and her other sisters feel caught in the middle, wanting to support Eli but struggling to understand and worrying about how kids at school will treat him.
    â€œHow’s Eli?” I ask.
    â€œHe started asking us to call him Ella. Dad is not having it. Every time one of us says ‘she’ instead of ‘he,’ he freaks the hell out. He and Mom had a huge fight about it last night.” Abby pulls her blond hair into a long ponytail. “How’s your mom?”
    â€œKind of a bitch. Granddad is doing her a kindness by letting her come home, and she’s picking fights with everybody. Him. Me. Even Luisa, who’s never done anything to her.”
    Neither have I , I remind myself. Unless you count being born.
    Abby frowns. “What did she say to you?”
    â€œShe told me I was tall.” I take another drink. “Her first words to me in fifteen years were, ‘Jesus, you’re tall.’”
    â€œSeriously?” Abby fiddles with the silver infinity necklace Ty gave her, her blue eyes sympathetic. “And then what?”
    â€œShe told my sisters I’m their aunt. Her little sister.”
    â€œShe what ?” Abby gasps.
    â€œYep. Gracie calls me ‘Aunt Ivy.’” I relate the whole awful conversation in the library, punctuating my story with sips of lemonade. “Hearing her say straight up that she doesn’t care about my feelings, that I was a mistake—”
    â€œYou were not. She made the mistake when she left. She missed out, because you’re awesome,” Abby says. “You know that, right?” Her phone beeps but she doesn’t look at it. “ Right? ”
    I nod, but my throat is tight because I don’t feel entirely convinced.
    Her phone beeps again, and this time she glances at it and her whole face lights up. “Ty’s here!”
    I wish I had somebody who made me smile like that.
    Like a mind reader, Abby nudges me. “Hey, you know what I bet would make you feel better? Making out with Alex.”
    Ever since I told her how Alex almost kissed me after prom, she’s been relentless. She loves the idea of her and Ty and Alex and me double-dating, of us going to the movies and parties and cheering the boys on at their baseball games. But we do all those things already.
    Abby means well, but I am tired of everyone telling me who I am, who I should be, what I should want. Who I date—if I date anybody at all—is going to be my own choice. “How many times do I have to tell you that Alex is like my brother?”
    â€œRight. Your hot brother you want to make out with, maybe.” Abby drains her beer. “Like Flowers in the Attic .”
    â€œJesus,” I mutter, but I can’t help laughing. “Go back to the party and see your boy.”
    She tilts her head. “You sure? I can stay. We can talk more.”
    â€œIt’s okay. I need some time.”
    She and Claire are used to me being an introvert. Granddad calls me “Ivy Bear,” but Claire and Abby tease that I’m more like a prickly little hedgehog. Abby squeezes my shoulder. “Okay. See you in a few,” she says and bounces off.
    Once she’s gone, I slump against the wooden piling and stare at the sailboats silhouetted against the dark water.
    This was a mistake. I should’ve stayed home and read a book instead of inflicting myself on other people. I don’t want to pretend to be fine, pretend that I’m not reeling and angry and sad.
    I finish my drink, then haul myself up and head back to the party. At the mouth of the marina, wooden benches line the brick sidewalk, which follows the arc of the shore. By the end of the night, a couple of the benches will be filled with couples making out.
    I feel a tug of yearning. I don’t want to mess up my friendship with Alex, but it’d be nice to be one of those couples. To