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Authors: Susan Crimp
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(nonbeliever).
Along with many other activities, I liked going to movies, listening to music, and making friends with athletes and singers—most of whom are non-Muslims. That meant I actually had become a kafir . I was taught that, to be in Paradise, I must unconditionallylove the Prophet Mohammad, whom I had never seen, more than anyone else, or I will surely go to hell. I became so perplexed.
I listened to my imams and was disturbed when they used abusive language to describe the non-Muslims as the grandsons of monkeys and pigs. I thought if anyone commits a sin, this should not be our problem; Allah, in due course, will punish him/her. Why do our imams have to condemn these people in such a derogatory manner?
To my surprise, many of my Muslim friends and our imams told me that it was my duty to revile and ridicule the non-Muslims, since they are the enemies of Muslims. When I refused to abide by the Islamic tenet of deriding the kafirs , they labeled me as a weak Muslim. They even informed me that a Muslim stranger is better than an old trusted kafir friend is.
However, I was adamant with my questions—I would not let them go unanswered. The most pertinent question on my mind was: How could a “God,” who claims himself to be filled with mercy, at the same time ask his people to hate one another? Why does “God” have to threaten to burn and torture people who do not believe in him? Is he really that needy? Is it so important that we consistently worship him?
I started thinking very deeply. I searched the Qur’an and found that everyone’s destiny had already been decided by God. God had already determined who will be in hell and who will be in Paradise! Therefore, logically, there is no need for humans to pray. When I put this question to my devoutly religious friends, they became angry. They asked me how I could know in advance whether I should be in hell or in Paradise. I told them that since our destiny has already been ascertained by God, praying or not praying would not really make any difference.
They thought I was crazy since I had developed doubt about Allah and the Qur’an.
This was the start of my hating Islam. However, I was helpless. In the society in which I live I was not able to do anything openly which goes against Islam.
In 1999, my mother fell sick and eventually died. This was a turning point in my life. I thought: We, the Muslims, are not really the best in the world. Just like any other human being, we too get ill and die, after all . I also came to the conclusion that if we worked hard we should be successful; if we did not, we are bound to fail. There is no such thing as “Allah’s will.” There is nothing so special for the Muslims.
When I look around the Islamic world, all I find is utter injustice, unabated discrimination against women and kafirs, and blatant abuse and violation of human rights, not to mention the absolute political corruption in Islamic countries. In fact, there is nothing good in our Islamic world to talk about. Most of the Islamic world is in deep trouble, whereas there is relative peace, prosperity, and freedom in most non-Islamic countries.
I asked myself, “What is the reason for this?” The only plausible answer to me was Islam.
Although my hatred of Islam increased, I was unable to leave it. I still could not bring myself to the reality that Islam could be that bad. I thought it might be that the problem was with the people and not the religion.
However, on September 11, 2001, I saw the real face of Islam. I saw the happiness on the faces of our people because so many infidels were slaughtered so easily. I was shocked at the gloating of our people for killing innocent kafirs . I saw many people who started thanking Allah for this massacre. Our Islamic people said that Allah gave us our wish, and that this was the beginning of the destruction of kafir countries.
To me, this was sheer inhumanity.
Then, the imam implored Allah to help the Taliban
Along with many other activities, I liked going to movies, listening to music, and making friends with athletes and singers—most of whom are non-Muslims. That meant I actually had become a kafir . I was taught that, to be in Paradise, I must unconditionallylove the Prophet Mohammad, whom I had never seen, more than anyone else, or I will surely go to hell. I became so perplexed.
I listened to my imams and was disturbed when they used abusive language to describe the non-Muslims as the grandsons of monkeys and pigs. I thought if anyone commits a sin, this should not be our problem; Allah, in due course, will punish him/her. Why do our imams have to condemn these people in such a derogatory manner?
To my surprise, many of my Muslim friends and our imams told me that it was my duty to revile and ridicule the non-Muslims, since they are the enemies of Muslims. When I refused to abide by the Islamic tenet of deriding the kafirs , they labeled me as a weak Muslim. They even informed me that a Muslim stranger is better than an old trusted kafir friend is.
However, I was adamant with my questions—I would not let them go unanswered. The most pertinent question on my mind was: How could a “God,” who claims himself to be filled with mercy, at the same time ask his people to hate one another? Why does “God” have to threaten to burn and torture people who do not believe in him? Is he really that needy? Is it so important that we consistently worship him?
I started thinking very deeply. I searched the Qur’an and found that everyone’s destiny had already been decided by God. God had already determined who will be in hell and who will be in Paradise! Therefore, logically, there is no need for humans to pray. When I put this question to my devoutly religious friends, they became angry. They asked me how I could know in advance whether I should be in hell or in Paradise. I told them that since our destiny has already been ascertained by God, praying or not praying would not really make any difference.
They thought I was crazy since I had developed doubt about Allah and the Qur’an.
This was the start of my hating Islam. However, I was helpless. In the society in which I live I was not able to do anything openly which goes against Islam.
In 1999, my mother fell sick and eventually died. This was a turning point in my life. I thought: We, the Muslims, are not really the best in the world. Just like any other human being, we too get ill and die, after all . I also came to the conclusion that if we worked hard we should be successful; if we did not, we are bound to fail. There is no such thing as “Allah’s will.” There is nothing so special for the Muslims.
When I look around the Islamic world, all I find is utter injustice, unabated discrimination against women and kafirs, and blatant abuse and violation of human rights, not to mention the absolute political corruption in Islamic countries. In fact, there is nothing good in our Islamic world to talk about. Most of the Islamic world is in deep trouble, whereas there is relative peace, prosperity, and freedom in most non-Islamic countries.
I asked myself, “What is the reason for this?” The only plausible answer to me was Islam.
Although my hatred of Islam increased, I was unable to leave it. I still could not bring myself to the reality that Islam could be that bad. I thought it might be that the problem was with the people and not the religion.
However, on September 11, 2001, I saw the real face of Islam. I saw the happiness on the faces of our people because so many infidels were slaughtered so easily. I was shocked at the gloating of our people for killing innocent kafirs . I saw many people who started thanking Allah for this massacre. Our Islamic people said that Allah gave us our wish, and that this was the beginning of the destruction of kafir countries.
To me, this was sheer inhumanity.
Then, the imam implored Allah to help the Taliban
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