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control. Right? And I don’t even need to lose it all. Just enough for me to convince my mother that I don’t need any help. And if Kimi wants to use me, then I’m gonna use her.
    Yeah.
    “Yeah.” I nod. “I’m on your side.”

Chapter 21

    Mick: Over me dead fuckin’ body.
    “You fucking sold ’em yet, shit-fer-brains?”
    I barely twitch me head to the right as the cunt in the fluoro-green cap and thin greying goatee holds a fuckin’ switchblade to me neck. His breath smells like vomit and cat food.
    “No? Was that a fucking no?”
    I whisper “yes” through me gritted teeth, tryin’ not to move me jaw so the knife don’t poke into me skin.
    “You’ve got a month. He said if you haven’t exchanged ’em for the coke in a month, there are no second chances. But you know what I can’t fucking believe, mate?”
    I shake me head, take quick breaths through the corner of me mouth, and let ’em out me nose. He’s got me locked in his arms, holding me from behind. I can feel his gun stickin’ in the crack in me arse, and it makes me want to spit phelgm in his fuckin’ face for making me picture the sick cunt butt-fuckin’ me in the alley.
    “I can’t for the life of me,” he says, drawing out the word life , as if tryin’ to point out that he has one and I don’t, “figure out why he’s given you such a long grace period. But I swear, if you do take longer than a month, you know whaddit means, don’t you, faggot-shit?”
    I close me eyes. I nod. But I swear to fuckin’ God, if he lays a fuckin’ piss-stinkin’ finger on ’er, I won’t fuckin’ hold back. I’ll kill ’im meself. That’s a fuckin’ promise.
    Bile rises in me throat when he spins me round ’n’ breathes straight into me face. I wanna dry-retch, but I force it down. I can’t let this scum-wanker-cunt think he’s got a hold over me emotions. I can’t let him know I’m actually shittin’ big black motherfuckin’ bricks right now. Me own dad. Me dad is doing this shit to me. Because he knows how much I love me mum. How much I would do anything to save ’er.
    The guy cackles and shows his pointy white teeth with two or three gold ones stuck in there. It sounds like he’s runnin’ his tonsils over a cheese grater.
    “Good,” he says, and pushes me backwards. I lose me balance and fall on me arse, whack me head, and pierce me right hand on a rusty nail that’s pokin’ through a concrete crack. He laughs again, steps a bit further back, and points the switchblade at me from a distance, as if it were a part of his finger.
    “One month. I’m not fucking kidding you.”
    I nod, over and over, gasping for breath through me effort not to cry.
    I watch as the guy turns left out of the laneway, only two blocks from me house. He must be bullshittin’ me. It’s gotta be a test or somethin’.
    There’s no way me dad would whack me mum. Why now? After all the chances he had of doing it, and gettin’ away clean.
    I sit up and run me fingers along me neck, to make sure there’s no blood. Me heartbeat slows down to somethin’ a bit more normal.
    Me neck’s not cut.
    But if I’m not careful, Mum’s’ll be.

Chapter 22
    Sonia: Somewhere over the rainbow.
    It is seven a.m. and everyone’s mailboxes are decorated with dew. When I was a child, I liked to think the dew meant fairies had been out to play during the night. Especially when the sun shone through dispersive prisms of condensation, creating a field of colour across my front lawn. It was the rainbow that first got me interested in mathematics and physics, and its ever-elusive pot of gold. It didn’t take long for me to rationalize that the pot of gold was simply the bait to enrich my knowledge.
    I hold my ear against my front door, whispering for it to be kind to me today. I am short on time to get ready for school, as I overslept at Nash’s house.
    A sparrow chirps from the window ledge, as if to tell me the coast is clear, and flutters away.
    Quiet. Thank