Baker be on her tombstone? She almost blurted out the question. Instead she bit down on her tongue and squeezed Lucie closer to her chest.
âHave you ever been to New Jersey?â Helen asked.
âYou can take the train from Metro Park to New York City. The station is close to where you will be living. I understand the trip is less than fifty minutes. No, I have never been to New York City either.â
Helen leaned forward, trying to see what the driver of the van looked like. The tinted shield between the back passenger seats and the front seats was as darkly tinted as the windows.
âSit back please, youâre obstructing my view,â the driver said.
âAre you a case or a volunteer?â
âDoes it matter?â the driver asked.
âIt matters to me when other people control my life and my every movement.â
âIt didnât bother you before you came into the program. You were in harmâs way then. Today, you are in the arms of angels who only want what is best for you. You can leave anytime you want.â The voice was suddenly cold and frosty.
âI didnât say I wanted to leave. Forget I said anything.â
âItâs forgotten. Relax and enjoy the ride.â The voice gentled, and to Helenâs ears she thought she detected a hint of tears. Nothing in the world was the way it seemed. Nothing. For now . She had to hold on to those two little words: for now .
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Five days later, Helen slowed the Volvo to a crawl as she approached Exit 11 on the New Jersey Turnpike. She paid the toll, asked for directions, turned north toward the Garden State Parkway, where she got off at Exit 131. From there she followed the signs to Route 27 and then to Route 1, where she almost missed the turnoff to the apartment complex. She heaved a sigh of relief when she drove around the parking lot and located the building she wanted.
She was home.
Five trips later, Helen slipped off the pet harness and lowered Lucie to the floor. A second later, leash in hand, they made their way down to the first floor and outdoors. Lucie sniffed, squatted, and was ready to go back inside.
Helen was happy to see the dead bolt and two other locks on both doors of the apartment, all of which she put into place immediately.
It was time to check out her new home. The first home she and she alone would be responsible for. The grungy efficiency sheâd once lived in simply didnât count. Here, in these small quarters, she could do as she pleased, when she pleased. If she wanted to walk around in her underwear, she could. If she wanted to leave dishes in the sink, she could. She could leave the television on all night. She could play the radio all day. She could eat cereal for dinner if she wanted. She could leave the sheets on the bed for two weeks instead of changing them every day the way Daniel insisted.
There was no Daniel in her life telling her what she could or couldnât do. From this day forward she was responsible for her own life and Lucieâs as well.
Life was going to be worth living after all.
âI have some wonderful ideas, Lucie,â Helen said, sitting down cross-legged on the floor. Lucie jumped into her lap. âAs soon as the computer is hooked up, Iâm going to see about selling lingerie on-line. Pretty, sexy stuff. Mona encouraged me. I know the computer pretty well now. I just might make enough money so I can pay back all thatâs been given to us. I want to be independent. I donât want to be a taker anymore. Weâre going to give back, too, just as soon as we can turn a profit. Maybe I wonât have to work at the store if shopping on-line becomes profitable. Daniel said it was the wave of the future. Maybe he was right. I did say we were going to check out our new digs, didnât I? Come on, girl, letâs see what our new home looks like.
âWe arenât going to get lost, thatâs for sure,â Helen said as she walked
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