was there, though. Looking totally psycho. I guess he hasnât been sleeping.â
Miriam wiped her palms on her comforter. She pulled it up to her chin, feeling safer under its warmth. âI donât want to talk about them, Ruth. I just canât.â
Ruth leaned forward. âYou know, Miriam,â she said sharply. âYouâre not the only one hurting. Holly was my friend, too.â
Miriam shook her head sadly. âIâm sorry, I know youâre right. Iâm just so miserable. And frightened.â
Ruth sat down on Miriamâs bed. âHolly and Ididnât always get along. But still, I canât believe sheâs gone.â Ruth met Miriamâs gaze. âIâm controlling my emotions, but that doesnât mean I donât have them.â
Miriam sat up in bed. âI
never
thought that, Ruth,â she replied, gripping her friendâs hand. âI know you must be upset too. Itâs just that â¦â
âWhat?â
Miriam tried to smile. âI miss her already.â A tear rolled down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away. âI miss her, and I havenât been able to think about anything else. Every time I close my eyes, I see Hollyâs face.â
âI know,â Ruth replied. âThe school is having an assembly tomorrow. Kind of a memorial. Theyâre going to talk about Hollyâs death, lecture on school safety, all that stuff.â
She paused. âThe school counselors think everyone will go nuts if they donât talk about their feelings. Maybe it would do
you
some good to talk about it.â
Miriam sighed. âIâve been talking to myself all day, and
that
hasnât helped. My mom says I have to go back tomorrow. She thinks I need to get back into the routine. That it will help me forget.â
Forget Hollyâs death? Miriam thought.
Never.
Miriam threw her pillow at the wall, feeling a burst of rage. âEveryone thinks I should forget about seeing Hollyâs body! How is that possible?â
âI didnât mean it that way,â Ruth said quickly.
Miriam nodded, her anger fading back into sadness.âI know. I was talking about everyone elseâmy parents and Jed. Not you, Ruthâyou understand how I feel. I couldnât get through this without you.â
Ruth looked away. âIâm not so strong. On the inside.â
âI wish
I
was as tough as you,â Miriam persisted. âI always have. You keep your cool. You didnât miss school. I know youâve been through this before with your father. But that doesnât make Hollyâs death any easier to take.â
âHollyâs
murder,â
Ruth corrected her.
Miriam shivered. âI donât want to think about that.â
âWe have to, Miriam,â Ruth argued. âWe know who did it.â
âNo, we donât.â
âYouâre going to sit there with a straight face and say Mei and Noah didnât kill Holly?â Ruth jumped to her feet.
âCome on,
Miriam! Didnât you tell the police anything last night?â
âNo!â
Ruth looked incredulous. âWhy not?â
âThereâs no proof.â
Miriamâs voice caught on the words. She knew her argument sounded lame. Mei and Noah were guilty. Why couldnât she accept that? They killed
her best friend!
Ruthâs hand tightened around Miriamâs.
âMei and Noah are the only two who had a reason to kill Holly,â Ruth whispered. âAnd you know it!â
Miriam couldnât argue. She
did
know it.
âHolly knew it, too,â Miriam replied after a moment. âAnd
we
didnât believe her.â
She stared at Ruth in grim silence.
Finally Ruth asked, âWhat should we do?â
âWe canât do anything,â Miriam insisted. âItâs not that I donât want to. But we have no proof. The only thing we can tell the police is that Mei and Noah talked
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