massage my tired hand. Then I get up and stare into the mirror on my closet door. It seems as if I should look different. Have sparkles around my head or weird shimmery eyes like a character in a TV show. But I look the same as I always did. Just with worse hair.
Is my life going to change now? I canât imagine it changing more than it already has. I donât even know if my underhearing is going to stay forever or just disappear one day. But Iâve figured something out about it, figured out when it happens, and that makes me feel a little less out of control. Less scared.
The next morning, Iâm lying on my stomach across the bed, Pixie purring next to me and my journal open to the page with the charts, when my mom opens the door without knocking. I turn my head, startled, and she breezes in, wearing one of her trademark long Indian-print skirts. She takes one look at the diary and a grin appears on her face.
âOh, baby Sunshine, I am so happy to seeââ I glare at her pointedly and she cuts her sentence short. âAnyway. Well. If thereâs ever anythingââ
âI know , Mom,â I say, hurriedly, and slam the diary shut. âThanks,â I add. I donât want her to get nosy, start asking questions I donât know how to answer. I mean, my mom is a little bit out there, but itâs not like she believes in magic or ghosts or anything supernatural. At least, I donât think so. Not like some of her crazy dippy friends.
Mom paces over to the window and opens the curtains, flooding the room with painfully bright light. I squint. âDonât forget Auntie Minaâs coming over this afternoon,â she says, leaning against my desk and smiling a little. âWe need to get her out of that house for a while . And I bought a vanilla chai tea blend I think sheâs going to love.â
That house. I canât even remember when we first started to call it that. But when I got older, I could see for myself how Uncle Randall was when heâd get into his âmoods.â Heâd have everybody walking on eggshells, hoping not to say the wrong thing. And it seemed like it got worse after Number Two moved out and Shiri started high school.
Maybe thatâs why she was such an overachiever back then, going out for tennis team and spending time in after-school study hall on days when she didnât have tennis practice. Going to as many SAT and AP prep classes as she could. Was she trying to make her dad happy, or just trying to stay out of the way?
âSunny?â Mom says, looking at me. I shake myself a little. I know she asked me a question, but I have no idea what it was.
âSorry. Guess Iâm a little distracted.â I sit up and try to look attentive.
âI asked if youâd like to sit with me later this evening and go through some family photos,â Mom says, picking at a loose thread on her skirt. âI was hoping to make a scrapbook for Mina that we can give her, later, when sheâs ready, to help her preserve the good memories ofâeverything.â Her eyes are shining. I canât deal with my mom crying, so I nod, just so we can end this conversation. But I donât know how I can bear to go through photos.
âOh, good. Iâm so glad you said yes. Iâve been feeling like I need some moral support these days,â she continues, âwith you and your father keeping everything so bottled up. Youâre like two peas in a pod.â
I scowl and stow the journal safely in my desk drawer, on top of Shiriâs journal. I love my mom, but she takes the touchy-feely thing a little too far sometimes.
She smiles a little and straightens up, wandering back toward the door. âOh! And I invited Antonia to come over later tonight to help us with the scrapbooking. Sheâs got such a fabulous collection of suppliesârubber stamps, glitter, rickrack, stickers ⦠I thought it would cheer us
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