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Book: Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Weird Inventions by Bathroom Readers’ Institute
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Authors: Bathroom Readers’ Institute
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savory snack that won’t make me gain weight!”), but then declined precipitously (“Wow! These fake chips are causing me to poop myself blind!”).
Studies later indicated that Olestra’s pants-ruining side effects were not as widespread as initially thought; i.e. not everyone who consumes the product suffers from uncontrollable diarrhea. That was good enough for the FDA, which no longer requires products made with Olestra to contain a warning label. Yet Olestra’s bad reputation proved hard to shake, and to this day most people would rather gain a little weight than take their chances with it. Happily, science found another use for sucrose polyester, which has been repurposed as a machine lubricant and an additive in deck stains.
POTTY TRAINING FOR CATS
A pparently enough people have evaluated the budget spreadsheets comparing the kitty-litter costs with the water bill to warrant another member of the family getting in line for the bathroom. Hence CitiKitty Cat Toilet Training Kit, or the Original World Famous Litter Kwitter. Pet owners can wean their feline off the little sandbox in just a few steps: clipping a pseudo litter box under the toilet seat, then transitioning to a piece that has a big hole in the middle, and finally graduating to full-on toilet time!
Now lazy husbands have someone else to blame when they forget to flush. But your kitty won’t be getting too many high fives from environmentalists, either; in 2007 the National Public Health Service for Wales wrote a scathing letter to the Veterinary Record citing cats as the source of the Toxoplasma gondii bacteria—typically found in cat feces—that were found in blood samples taken from numerous carcasses of whales, porpoises, and otters off the coast of England. A study by Swansea University soon after connected the bacteria to numerous people in the community who admitted to flushing their cats’ droppings down the crapper.
CAT WIGS
I f there’s one thing cats hate, it’s being messed with. And if there’s another thing cats hate, it’s when you try to make them wear stuff. Completely ignoring those two facts, Kitty Wigs are a thing.
Kitty Wigs are exactly what they sound like—wigs for cats. They were purely cosmetic items, because unlike humans who wear wigs to cover up hair loss, cats aren’t hairless (except for hairless cats). But good luck getting a haired (or hairless) cat to wear one of these long, super-straight-haired wigs (they remind one of Cher in the early ’70s). Four colors were initially available: “pink passion” (for a punk cat), “bashful blond” (for the cat who likes Old Hollywood glamour), “silver fox” (for the distinguished cat), and “electric blue” (for the cat who wants to have blue hair).
Kitty Wigs, the company behind Kitty Wigs, stopped selling them directly in 2012, and now publishes books full of cats wearing wigs.
X-RAY SHOE FITTER
D espite seeing their nation drop two atomic bombs on Japan in 1945, mid-20th-century Americans thought radiation was really cool and very futuristic. In fact, consumers didn’t mind being blasted with a few gamma rays when they went to the store to make sure the shoes they bought fit perfectly. Hey, shoes are expensive, and beauty hurts.
In the late 1940s and early ’50s, the Adrian X-Ray Company out of Milwaukee made and sold 10,000 devices to shoe stores that allowed customers to see just how well their shoes fit—by X-raying their feet while they were wearing the shoes. The X-Ray Shoe Fitter allowed them to see inside the shoe (and also their bones), via a small window on the unit.
The machines were a popular novelty—especially among children. They lasted in thousands of shoe stores until the federal government banned them in 1970. For while the box where a patron rested their feet was lead-lined, neither the compartment, nor the viewing windows were sealed. Result: persistant radiation leakage.
SPIRAL SHOES
J ulian Hakes is a British architect and
Studies later indicated that Olestra’s pants-ruining side effects were not as widespread as initially thought; i.e. not everyone who consumes the product suffers from uncontrollable diarrhea. That was good enough for the FDA, which no longer requires products made with Olestra to contain a warning label. Yet Olestra’s bad reputation proved hard to shake, and to this day most people would rather gain a little weight than take their chances with it. Happily, science found another use for sucrose polyester, which has been repurposed as a machine lubricant and an additive in deck stains.
POTTY TRAINING FOR CATS
A pparently enough people have evaluated the budget spreadsheets comparing the kitty-litter costs with the water bill to warrant another member of the family getting in line for the bathroom. Hence CitiKitty Cat Toilet Training Kit, or the Original World Famous Litter Kwitter. Pet owners can wean their feline off the little sandbox in just a few steps: clipping a pseudo litter box under the toilet seat, then transitioning to a piece that has a big hole in the middle, and finally graduating to full-on toilet time!
Now lazy husbands have someone else to blame when they forget to flush. But your kitty won’t be getting too many high fives from environmentalists, either; in 2007 the National Public Health Service for Wales wrote a scathing letter to the Veterinary Record citing cats as the source of the Toxoplasma gondii bacteria—typically found in cat feces—that were found in blood samples taken from numerous carcasses of whales, porpoises, and otters off the coast of England. A study by Swansea University soon after connected the bacteria to numerous people in the community who admitted to flushing their cats’ droppings down the crapper.
CAT WIGS
I f there’s one thing cats hate, it’s being messed with. And if there’s another thing cats hate, it’s when you try to make them wear stuff. Completely ignoring those two facts, Kitty Wigs are a thing.
Kitty Wigs are exactly what they sound like—wigs for cats. They were purely cosmetic items, because unlike humans who wear wigs to cover up hair loss, cats aren’t hairless (except for hairless cats). But good luck getting a haired (or hairless) cat to wear one of these long, super-straight-haired wigs (they remind one of Cher in the early ’70s). Four colors were initially available: “pink passion” (for a punk cat), “bashful blond” (for the cat who likes Old Hollywood glamour), “silver fox” (for the distinguished cat), and “electric blue” (for the cat who wants to have blue hair).
Kitty Wigs, the company behind Kitty Wigs, stopped selling them directly in 2012, and now publishes books full of cats wearing wigs.
X-RAY SHOE FITTER
D espite seeing their nation drop two atomic bombs on Japan in 1945, mid-20th-century Americans thought radiation was really cool and very futuristic. In fact, consumers didn’t mind being blasted with a few gamma rays when they went to the store to make sure the shoes they bought fit perfectly. Hey, shoes are expensive, and beauty hurts.
In the late 1940s and early ’50s, the Adrian X-Ray Company out of Milwaukee made and sold 10,000 devices to shoe stores that allowed customers to see just how well their shoes fit—by X-raying their feet while they were wearing the shoes. The X-Ray Shoe Fitter allowed them to see inside the shoe (and also their bones), via a small window on the unit.
The machines were a popular novelty—especially among children. They lasted in thousands of shoe stores until the federal government banned them in 1970. For while the box where a patron rested their feet was lead-lined, neither the compartment, nor the viewing windows were sealed. Result: persistant radiation leakage.
SPIRAL SHOES
J ulian Hakes is a British architect and
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