squeezed dry. The part of him that was more mature than his eighteen years scolded his abundance of self-pity, but didn’t know how to escape it or let logic triumph over lust.
His primary job used to be taking care of Luka, but now, since Luka doesn’t need to be cared for like that anymore, he takes care of me instead. He made so many poor choices when he was my age, he just wants better than that for me. He thinks he can save me from myself if he tries hard enough. He doesn’t want me seeing anything that would make me jealous and want to do things that would harm me physically or mentally. I get it. But it’s becoming absolutely fucking ridiculous. I just want him to listen to me for a change and believe I’m okay now, that it won’t kill me to give in a little bit and at least get a taste of what we used to have. Why can’t we at least start to ease back into normalcy? What the hell do I have to do to show them I’m healed and not lying, letting a teenager’s libido put my health in danger like he says it is?
Evan walked along the path through dense trees in order to reach a clearing on the other side. Golden, heavenly light filtered down into the small meadow from the treetops above, making the earth glow. Sometimes there were deer here, or rabbits, or groundhogs, but Evan’s presence always quickly scared them away. He headed to the center of the grassy expanse and lay down, his body flattening the supple, dew-damp blades all around him. Staring up at the thin, drifting white clouds above in the wide blue sky, Evan tried to remember how wonderful his life used to be, for such a horribly brief time before fear began to rule them all.
He thought of that night in the bathroom of the bar, when he first met Alek, and learned firsthand of the power in him, the determination to claim and possess. It was easier to think of their second sexual encounter though, since it was in a place so similar to the one he was in, how they’d rolled around on the grass, getting dirty, getting off, and not caring about anything but exploring each other. He thought, too, of the night under the stars in the back of the truck, how Alek let Evan call the shots and do exactly what he wanted to do.
Evan’s thumb popped the button of his fly, pushing the zipper down halfway. Slipping his hand inside his boxers to wrap around his shaft, he started to stroke himself hard. He thought of Alek—the
old
Alek.
He imagined Alek was out of his mind with desire; he just couldn’t take it anymore and needed Evan in the most carnal ways. Alek scratched and clawed at Evan’s body, leaving careless marks and bruises without being afraid Evan would hurt, Evan would die. Alek was only reckless and passionate, an animal. He turned Evan inside out with every possible filthy, forbidden touch of his fingers, his tongue, his sweat-slick, hard body and even harder cock.
Evan’s hand pumped faster inside his pants as he dreamed of Alek—
his
Alek.
“There you are,” Luka said breathlessly with Alek’s voice, appearing out of nowhere and slowing rapidly from a full run. He stopped completely a few feet away with a hand braced on his hip, towering over Evan.
Ripped so abruptly from fantasy, Evan yanked his right hand from his pants as soon as he heard the first word from Luka’s lips, cursing a muttered, “Fuck,” and sitting up as fast as he could manage. He drew one knee to his chest to help hide his erection.
Resting an arm on the knee, Evan turned his head away from Luka, toward the far end of the clearing as he attempted to master his expression. He was blushing fiercely. His jeans hung open in the front. Swallowing his pride, Evan tried on an awkward grin.
“Luka. I didn’t hear you coming. The hell are you doing out here? You checkin’ up on me?”
“Something like that,” he replied, licking his lips wet and taking slow steps closer, his gaze flicking noticeably to Evan’s lap and exactly what Evan was failing to disguise. “I
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