Read Online Tracing Holland (NSB Book 2) by Alyson Santos - Free Book Online Page A

you talking about?”
    She leans forward and gazes straight into me. “You deserve
to be loved. You deserve friends. You deserve to let someone in. I’m not saying
it has to be Holland, but if it is, you need to let it happen.”
    I laugh then. I know it’s just a defensive reaction, but
it’s so absurd. Talking about love after all this time. Talking about loving
Holland Drake of all people. And I thought Callie understood me. Crap, if she
doesn’t, I’m completely screwed.
    “Thanks, Cal, but seriously, you can’t worry about that.”
    She looks hurt. “Worry about what?”
    “You know what I mean. Me. Love. Dating. All that shit.
It’s…” I stop. It’s what? I don’t know. It just feels wrong, pointless.
    Now, she’s annoyed. “I’m not worried about anything, Luke. I
would never rush you or pressure you into a relationship! I just know you. I
know how you punish yourself and deny yourself anything that could remotely
lead to happiness. I’m calling you out on your self-denial because I’m afraid that’s
what I’m seeing here. This is a ‘get real’ moment.”
    I laugh when the grin spreads across her lips.
    “Oh, yeah? Is this Callie Roland Straight Talk?”
    She leans back and crosses her arms. “Yep, exactly. Callie Roland Straight Talk time. Just promise me you’re not
going to push Holland away if she starts to get close. That’s all I’m asking.
You don’t have to date her. You don’t have to fall in love with her. Just don’t
push her away if there’s a connection, that’s all. You deserve to be
understood.”
    I chuckle at that, I can’t help it. I know I’m pissing her
off, but she has no clue how ridiculous this whole conversation is. “Callie, I
love you, you know that. And I love that you care so much, but please, you’re
way off on this. Holland is great, I totally agree with you, but there’s
nothing for me to push away, ok? We’ve had a couple conversations and might be
friends one day, I don’t know, but she’s not into rockers, and I totally
respect that. It’s a wise move on her part. She faces enough of a stigma as a
woman in this business. She doesn’t need that kind of drama or gossip in her
life. And let’s face it, it doesn’t get any more dramatic than hooking up with
Luke Craven while on tour.”
    Callie is actually glaring at me now, and I have no idea how
to explain this any better.
    “She told you that? She actually said she wasn’t into
rockers,” she challenges, and I laugh.
    “Honestly, yes. She did.”
    “I don’t believe you. When?”
    “Yesterday.”
    “What? She just looked you in the face and said, ‘nope, not
a chance’?”
    I shrug. “Sorry to disappoint you, but yeah. Pretty much
exactly that, actually. Complete with all the awkwardness and uncomfortable
silence you’d expect. Although it was actually kind of sweet
in a way. Still, trying to figure that one out.”
    Her eyes widen. “Holy crap. You’re serious!”
    I shrug again and nod. “Yep.”
    “Are you freaking kidding me? Unbelievable.” She actually
curses this time and grips her fork in a violent fist.
    “I’m sure she just doesn’t want distractions in her life. I
don’t blame her.”
    Callie rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “Yeah, but still. To come out and actually say it? I will never
understand you musicians,” she mutters. “Seriously! You create so much drama
trying to avoid drama!”
    I laugh and pity her lasagna as she stabs it in frustration.
    “It’s fine, really. I’m not looking for a relationship, you
know that.”
    She meets my eyes, and I know I’ve said the wrong thing.
    “I know you’re not. And it’s ok not to look, as long as
you’re not closing yourself off from one finding you.”
    “You mean like a wall painting?” I ask just to test her
reaction. She looks appropriately confused, and I find some comfort in that. So
Holland had been telling the truth. The whole painting metaphor was original
Holland Drake