Read Online Totlandia: The Onesies, Book 1 (Fall) by Josie Brown - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Josie Brown
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our lives entirely green.”
Who the hell actually uses the word ‘eschew,’ Lorna thought as Bettina and the other woman, Kelly Overton, cooed admirably over the little boy’s duds. Then Kelly did a double take and turned to Lorna. “Oh, so you’re a Connaught? Then you must be married to Bettina’s brother, Matthew.” Kelly shifted her son, Wills, onto her other hip and held out a hand to Lorna.
“You know my husband?” Lorna asked as she shook it.
“Ha! You bet I know Matty! Why, Bettina and I practically grew up together. She’d be the first to tell you I had a crush on her older brother. He’s still adorable, I presume?”
Lorna didn’t like the way Kelly had practically purred his name. Her only consolation was that Bettina was just as annoyed. No one else would have picked up on Bettina’s ire, but Lorna had been around her long enough to know that whenever she smoothed her hair behind her right ear, she was pissed about something.
She waited until the women drifted off to the buffet table before asking Bettina, “It sounds like she knows Matt pretty well. Why is that?”
Bettina shrugged. “We all prepped together at Lick-Wilmerding.”
That’s when it hit Lorna. “Bettina, if that Kelly person hadn’t caught my last name, no one here would have known we were related.”
“That’s the point.” Finally, Bettina was smiling again. “I’d rather that it not become an issue—I mean, should you ever have to leave the club.”
“What does that mean, ‘should I ever have to leave’? The invitation said—”
“The invitation specifically mentioned a probationary period. Seriously, Lorna, with your lack of attention to detail, I’m surprised you actually graduated from Berkeley.” Bettina’s giggle was accompanied by a shrug. “To be perfectly honest with you, this year we’re in a bit of a pickle. Too many great families for too few slots. There’s still some weeding out to do. So let’s all pray you don’t somehow screw up Dante’s chances here at PHM&T, because we both know I don’t, and can’t, play favorites.”
Ha, Lorna thought. What you mean is that you won’t play favorites with me, but you certainly will for your BFF, Kelly.
Lorna waited until her voice was steady. “I would never presume that you would,” she said.
“So glad we’re both on the same page. You deserve to pat yourself on the back, Lorna. For once, you got somewhere all on your own.” Bettina didn’t excuse herself. She just handed Dante back to Lorna then walked toward the women and children who were now flowing through the doorway.
Lorna had a good mind to grab Bettina by her fake blond roots and pummel her into the ground. To stomp that smirk right off her face. To yank off one of her suede Prada platform booties and beat her to death with it.
But no, of course she couldn’t do that. It would set a bad example for Dante and the other children.
Besides, there were too many witnesses.
And as much as she’d like to, she couldn’t run away, either. She had to stick it out, for Dante’s sake.
She sighed deeply and tickled him under the chin in hope that he might smile. When he didn’t, she reasoned that her perceptive little man felt her pain.
He probably knew his Aunt Bettina was the cause of it, too.
From now on, whenever she read him a fairy tale, she knew what name she’d substitute for the word “witch.” It started with a ‘B’. And no, it wasn’t bitch.
As her heart swelled with love for her son, she smiled and hugged him even closer. “Come on, Stud, let’s go impress all these cute little girls.”
10:15 a.m.
Knowing the Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club’s Official Onesies Inaugural Play Date had been underway for the past fifteen minutes was driving Ally Thornton crazy. Flocks of mothers with children rushed through the gated entrance of the Flood Mansion and up its grand old stone staircase, but all Ally could do was watch from the backseat of her BMW X6
Who the hell actually uses the word ‘eschew,’ Lorna thought as Bettina and the other woman, Kelly Overton, cooed admirably over the little boy’s duds. Then Kelly did a double take and turned to Lorna. “Oh, so you’re a Connaught? Then you must be married to Bettina’s brother, Matthew.” Kelly shifted her son, Wills, onto her other hip and held out a hand to Lorna.
“You know my husband?” Lorna asked as she shook it.
“Ha! You bet I know Matty! Why, Bettina and I practically grew up together. She’d be the first to tell you I had a crush on her older brother. He’s still adorable, I presume?”
Lorna didn’t like the way Kelly had practically purred his name. Her only consolation was that Bettina was just as annoyed. No one else would have picked up on Bettina’s ire, but Lorna had been around her long enough to know that whenever she smoothed her hair behind her right ear, she was pissed about something.
She waited until the women drifted off to the buffet table before asking Bettina, “It sounds like she knows Matt pretty well. Why is that?”
Bettina shrugged. “We all prepped together at Lick-Wilmerding.”
That’s when it hit Lorna. “Bettina, if that Kelly person hadn’t caught my last name, no one here would have known we were related.”
“That’s the point.” Finally, Bettina was smiling again. “I’d rather that it not become an issue—I mean, should you ever have to leave the club.”
“What does that mean, ‘should I ever have to leave’? The invitation said—”
“The invitation specifically mentioned a probationary period. Seriously, Lorna, with your lack of attention to detail, I’m surprised you actually graduated from Berkeley.” Bettina’s giggle was accompanied by a shrug. “To be perfectly honest with you, this year we’re in a bit of a pickle. Too many great families for too few slots. There’s still some weeding out to do. So let’s all pray you don’t somehow screw up Dante’s chances here at PHM&T, because we both know I don’t, and can’t, play favorites.”
Ha, Lorna thought. What you mean is that you won’t play favorites with me, but you certainly will for your BFF, Kelly.
Lorna waited until her voice was steady. “I would never presume that you would,” she said.
“So glad we’re both on the same page. You deserve to pat yourself on the back, Lorna. For once, you got somewhere all on your own.” Bettina didn’t excuse herself. She just handed Dante back to Lorna then walked toward the women and children who were now flowing through the doorway.
Lorna had a good mind to grab Bettina by her fake blond roots and pummel her into the ground. To stomp that smirk right off her face. To yank off one of her suede Prada platform booties and beat her to death with it.
But no, of course she couldn’t do that. It would set a bad example for Dante and the other children.
Besides, there were too many witnesses.
And as much as she’d like to, she couldn’t run away, either. She had to stick it out, for Dante’s sake.
She sighed deeply and tickled him under the chin in hope that he might smile. When he didn’t, she reasoned that her perceptive little man felt her pain.
He probably knew his Aunt Bettina was the cause of it, too.
From now on, whenever she read him a fairy tale, she knew what name she’d substitute for the word “witch.” It started with a ‘B’. And no, it wasn’t bitch.
As her heart swelled with love for her son, she smiled and hugged him even closer. “Come on, Stud, let’s go impress all these cute little girls.”
10:15 a.m.
Knowing the Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club’s Official Onesies Inaugural Play Date had been underway for the past fifteen minutes was driving Ally Thornton crazy. Flocks of mothers with children rushed through the gated entrance of the Flood Mansion and up its grand old stone staircase, but all Ally could do was watch from the backseat of her BMW X6
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