Read Online THIS Is Me... by Sarah Ann Walker - Free Book Online

end up in a hospital again.
 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    CHAPTER 10
     
    MAY 12
     
     
     
     
      Waking again I am absolutely exhausted because the people just won't stop around here.  The noise won't stop and the stuff won't stop.  There is never a moment of peace here.  I don't know how long this waking up has been, but I'm ready to rest again.
  Endless Doctors and Technicians and Nurses and Specialists have been in my room since I woke up.  There have been so many people in here constantly.  There has been so much talking in here.  There has been so much activity in here.  There has been so much of everything in this little room.
      Throughout all the noise, everyone has been asking the same questions, and everyone has been touching me.  Everyone has been in my face and it’s just too much for me.
  I don't want to talk anymore, and I don't want to be touched anymore.  I don't want my legs moved while I close my eyes, and I don't want my arms raised as I open my eyes.  I don't want to be lifted, and shifted, and rolled, and changed anymore.  I don't want to hear about my movements, and I don’t want my memory tested again.  I don't want to hear about myself anymore because I'm not that interesting.  Plus, I’m really not listening anyway.
  I'm humiliated and exhausted at once.  But no one will actually tell me what happened, or what I did wrong to end up here.  No one answers any of MY questions; they just expect answers to all theirs.  And back and forth we go. 
      They ask me a question which I answer, and then I ask them a question which they do NOT answer.  Well, I'm not talking anymore and they can’t make me.  I'm tired, and I want to be left alone. 
 
     
      Where’s Marcus?  Why hasn't he come for me?  Where is my mother?  Why hasn't she come to claim me?  Why am I here?  These are such simple questions really but no one will answer me.
 
     
     
                                                  *****

 
     
      Waking, I know there's someone in here, again.  I know I'm not alone and I totally don't want to do this anymore.  Why can’t I just be alone?  I wish I could go back to my sleepless dreaming sleep again.  At least there I was alone in my head.  Well, except for all the talking and noise and stuff, I was alone.
  Opening my eyes slowly, I prepare for the newest person to invade my space.  Looking, I see the woman again with the atrocious Brooklyn accent.  Sitting beside me in a chair, she looks so happy to see me awake.  Ugh... here we go again.

  “Good morning, Suzanne.  How are you feeling?”
  “I'm fine .  Why?”
  “I'm just checking.  Why do you seem so agitated?  What's wrong?”
  “I'm not agitated.  I just don't know you, and you keep talking to me like I DO know you, and I don't.  That's all.  Why are you here again?”
  “I'm here because we're friends and I've missed you. And because I wanted to see you when you woke up.  I wanted to try to talk to you before the others arrived.”  The others?
  “Um, okay, I don't mean to be rude, but why do you keep saying that? I told you before that I don't know you.  I told you that before, like yesterday, or last night I think, but you keep saying that I do know you, but I'm not your friend.  I don't even know you, I'm sorry.” 
      Wow, I really do feel frustrated and tired and kind of angry at her or something.
  “Please listen to me, Suzanne.  I promise you DO know me.  You just have to remember me.  You know me very well and we're very close friends.  You stayed in my apartment in Manhattan.  We went shopping, and I even lent you my car, which I never lend to anyone.  We are friends- very close friends actually, I promise.  Just trust me, okay?”
  “I do apologize, but I don't remember you and I don't trust you.  Again, I don't mean to be rude, but would you mind if I had a little