Read Online They Don't Teach Corporate in College by Alexandra Levit - Free Book Online

best practice to add value and impact our bottom line.”
    What it means: Whoa, a quadruple whammy! You’ll usually find jargon-filled sentences like these in strategic documents, such as business plans. For simplicity’s sake, let’s break this one down:
    Leverage = recycle previous work
    Best practice = how everyone else is doing it
    Add value = justify a program’s existence
    Impact bottom line = make money
    So in other words: “We must take advantage of the fact that someone has already come up with a working concept that everyone in the company buys into. You should use this concept to convince the higher-ups that your project will make the company money.”
Settling In
    When I showed up to my new office, there was a problem with my Internet connection, and I couldn’t get my system up and running for the entire week. I was actually pretty annoyed, but there was no way in hell I was going to show it. I called the help desk a thousand times, and because I was always polite and grateful, I ended up being good friends with the guy. Now, whenever I have a computer issue, I know I’ll be his first priority.
    Micah, 23, Texas
    Imagine being shown to your new office—a windowless cubicle. A dead plant is there to greet you, along with crumbs of dirt all over the carpet. The lightbulbs are burned out and you don’t see your assigned laptop anywhere. Welcome to the business world! Don’t be offended that your new organization didn’t take the time to set up a nice workspace for you; just move on. The first thing to do (after cleaning up the crumbs, of course) is to procure your digital devices and ensure they are in working order so that people can get in touch with you immediately. Once your voice mail is functional, leave a short, friendly, and professional greeting. Speak slowly and block out as much background noise as possible.
    Next, it’s time to get some office supplies, so make your way over to the admin’s desk. Proceed with caution. No matter what your level in the company, do not assume that it is the admin’s responsibility to order your supplies. Ask her how you can order them, and see what she says. Pouting if you have to do it yourself is not a good idea. Look at it this way: at least now you can get those nifty dry erase markers you like!
    Hooray, now it’s time to decorate! Just keep in mind that, although your cube or office is the space you work in, it belongs to the company. It’s fine to place a few framed photographs on your desk and/or pictures on the walls, but don’t overdo it. Put all other personal items, including personal paperwork, in a single desk drawer that you can lock at night. You never know when your boss will need something from you after hours, and will take it upon himself to come looking for it. Also, be careful how much food you keep in your cube or office. Laugh if you want, but you don’t want to be the one blamed for the mouse that sends 30 colleagues screaming into the hallway.
    Plan strategically how you want to organize your desk. I know a lot of people who believe that having a cyclone of a desk makes them look as though they are so busy that they just can’t keep up with the work raining down on them. That may be true, but it also makes them look terribly disorganized. Being neat and efficient is part of your professional persona, so even if you’re the brilliant “absentminded professor” type, you might want to modify your habits. Create practical online and offline filing systems that allow easy access to regular materials and can be used readily should a coworker need to take over a project. Remove documents from your mailbox and email inbox as soon as you are finished with them, and write notes using the old-school dry-erase board or the new-school Evernote ( evernote.com ) to avoid a sticky-pad explosion. I think you’ll find that keeping order is easy if you start at the