find.
• • • • •
Stephens was standing with Cage and Teacher. The sergeant and Cage had rested the butts of their rifles on their hips. Teacher was smoking.
“I think the new LT is getting the hang of this stuff,” said Cage.
“We’ll see how he copes once he comes under fire. You get the true measure of a man then,” Stephens said, as he looked up to the trees that surrounded them. He saw a bamboo platform. “Sniper’s nest.”
“Yeah, looks like it,” said Cage.
“Sergeant!” came the shout from Cook.
Stephens, Cage, and Teacher joined him.
“I got a hole here.” Cook had lifted up a thatched cover to a hole that led underground.
“I hope you checked that thatched door for tripwires before you opened it, Private?” asked Stephens.
“Of course,” said Cook.
“They’re like rats. Their tunnels might as well be sewers. Pure vermin, every damned last one of them,” said Stephens. “Cook, gimme your flashlight. Cage, tie the rope around me, you hold the rope, you feel me tug on it two times and you pull me up.”
“Same routine as ever, Sergeant,” said Cage.
“I’m just checking. I don’t want you getting sloppy on me, Corporal.”
“You want me to get the .45 from the LT?”
“No, the CAR-15 will do.” Stephens patted the weapon.
“That’s risky,” said Cage.
“Why?” asked Teacher.
“Explain, Cage.”
“Cuz holding the rifle and flash in the same hand will give the enemy a target. A target Stephens is behind.”
“If I used the .45 I could hold the flashlight to the left of my body so the first slant-eyed shot would miss,” added Stephens.
“But you ain’t a sissy, right?” Teacher said. “No zipper-head scares Stephens. You’re a badass mofo, ain’t you?”
“You and Cage know, more so than the other men, that I’ve grown somewhat numb to the war. I need new ways to get my heart beating faster. I need new ways to feel … alive.”
“Killing ain’t enough, Sarge?”
“Killing used to be enough to remind me I still walked on the same … mortal realm as other men,” he said. “It reminded me how easily my own life could be taken and that was enough, for a short time, enough to keep me on edge. But now the numbness has started to take over. It’s spread through my mind,” he pointed to his forehead, “and life like a cancer. Any resemblance of the man I was before the war, gone. That’s why I’m on my third tour. That’s why I’m about to duck-walk through an NVA tunnel, heading straight towards the depths of hell.”
Stephens took the cigarette from Teacher’s mouth. He had a drag then gave it back. “I wonder when Jacobs will go through the change, or if he will?” he said.
“The change?” asked Teacher.
“I liken the change into an evolved warrior god, to that of a caterpillar … fresh meat, entering a cocoon … Nam, and then being born a butterfly … a soldier. A butterfly with wings inked by blood. I remember when I saw the transformation in you, Teacher. I saw when you began to relish your kills. Like a hunter will hang the heads of his game above his fireplace. I also remember men who have been flown in and didn’t make the change. I remember zipping up their body bags.”
“So, I’m a butterfly? It sounds kinda homosexual,” said Teacher.
Stephens rolled his eyes. “Get Jacobs and Buttons to radio command. Let them know someone is going underground. You can have that job, Cook.”
Cook left and Cage tied the green rope around Stephens’s waist. “Okay, Sergeant, we’re good to go.”
“Let’s kill some gooky-rats.” Stephens winked.
• • • • •
Stephens duck-walked forward in the tunnel, holding the flashlight in his left hand. He used that same hand to hold the barrel of his rifle. His right hand’s finger was a hair from the trigger, but relaxed.
He could feel soft mud ground below his boots. Water too. He kept his steps as controlled as possible to make sure anyone who
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