The Woman who Loved an Octopus and other Saint's Tales

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Authors: Imogen Rhia Herrad
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fine, doing really well. She changed her name to Claudia. You know. More Roman.
    Oh, come on. Rome’s OK.
    No, really. It’s a great place.
    It’s HUGE. Look at that field there, and that, and that one, and then that hill and those two over there as well. And now imagine they’re all covered with stone streets and stone houses, and crowded with people. That’s how big just one of the quarters of Rome is.
    There are houses there, higher than trees. In the tenements, you walk up flights of stairs, up and up and up like a mountain. Some of those houses have five or even six storeys! They are called insulae - islands, you know - and when you’re on the top floor of one and you’ve got your breath back and look out, it is a bit like being on an island; only you’re surrounded by a sea of buildings and people and donkeys and shouts and smells...
    No – I am glad I’m back, honest! And you’re still my best friend in the world, Arddun, of course you are. You don’t know how glad I am to sit here again with you, in the dunes like we used to when we were kids. It’s just... I’ve been away for six years – that’s nearly half my life. And it’s really weird being back here now. It’s like it’s almost not home anymore, you know? Everything’s so different.
    Or, I don’t know. Maybe I’m different.
    I miss Rome. I know we were there as prisoners really, but that was only in the beginning. Then they let us free, after Father and Mother paid homage to the Empress Agrippina and the Emperor Claudius.
    Hades. Don’t let Tegau catch me saying that! She doesn’t like the thought of any of us paying homage to another king. I don’t think she really believes Rome exists....
    You remember her, don’t you – Tegau, my old nurse? She still thinks I’m a kid, and I’m not! I’m fifteen, a grown woman.
    You know I freed Tegau? I freed all my slaves, and I asked Grandfather to free all his. We pay them now for what they do, and some of them have left. Imagine! I wouldn’t have expected that they would just want to go off like that, after they’d been with us for so long. I mean, I thought they’d be pleased with me about their freedom. Sometimes I almost wish I hadn’t freed them. Or that Grandfather had forbidden it. But somehow, I think he understands.
    Well, it’s because we were slaves when we first went to Rome. All of u s ! We were taken to Rome in chains, because of Mother and Father starting that rebellion against the Romans. You should hear the bard, he doesn’t half go on about it. He’s written a whole bloody epic. It’s all made up though. It’s all about how heroic and brave we were, and I can tell you, we weren’ t ! First of all there was that really, really awful journey to Rome, on the boat. We didn’t know what they would do to us. There were other slaves on board and they said we were going to be a spectacle in the arena – you know, in the circus. Torn apart and eaten by wild animals as the Enemies of Rome, with a huge crowd looking on and roaring and laughing and drinking and farting. And you die and scream with pain...
    Sorry.

    Didn’t mean to be morbid. I just still dream about it, sometimes.
    No, no, no, of course it didn’t really happen, I wouldn’t be here otherwise – would I? We were taken to watch once, later, after we were freed, when we were the guests of the empress and emperor.
    It was terrible. Oh, Arddun, it was horrible. I think that was when I became a Marian. After, I mean. When we got there, I wasn’t even sure what was going to happen at first. I thought it was going to be acrobats, magicians, like those you can see in the streets only much grander. Then the people came into the arena. Criminals, gladiators, men, women... Oh, Arddun, you can’t imagine.
    But they’re not doing it for the gods! It’s for

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