– and trying to gauge the effect she’s having.’
Caliste frowned. ‘I bow to your experience, Sister,’ she said, ‘and if you have doubts about this woman’s veracity, I will take them seriously.’ She stood up, and the infirmarer instantly did the same.
‘My lady?’ Sister Liese said. ‘Are you going to bed, at last?’
Caliste looked at her in surprise. ‘No, Sister! I’m coming with you to see your patient.’
The long infirmary was dark and quiet as the two nuns slipped inside. A nun sat at the far end, a single candle illuminating the area immediately around her. She stood up as Caliste and Sister Liese walked towards her, and the infirmarer motioned her to sit down again. Sister Liese led the way to a curtained recess at the far end of the room.
Caliste stood looking down at Lilas of Hamhurst. The old woman was awake, lying quite still with her eyes fixed on some point on the wall to her left. Caliste sat down on the edge of the bed.
‘What do you see?’ she asked softly. ‘Do your visions disturb you, Lilas?’
Lilas turned her head. ‘Who are you?’ she whispered. There was fear in her eyes.
‘My name is Caliste, and I am abbess here,’ Caliste said.
Lilas shot out a hand and grasped Caliste’s wrist. ‘I’ve been bad, my lady,’ she whispered. ‘I did have a vision – as God’s my witness, I
did
, I saw … I saw …’ Her face crumpled, and she whimpered in terror. ‘I saw terrible things, and the voices, they went on and on at me, telling me what would happen, saying the land was gone to the bad because we were all sinners, and the greatest of us were the worst sinners of all, and then – oh, I’m sorry, my lady!’ She pulled Caliste’s hand up to her face, kissing it over and over again.
I would send for a priest
,
if I could
, Caliste thought.
Here is a soul in torment, yet the solace of confession is not available to ease her suffering.
She would just have to do her best.
‘What have you done, Lilas?’ she asked quietly.
The old woman shot her a look. ‘I may have exaggerated a bit,’ she muttered. ‘I liked the attention, see. My neighbours, they all fussed round me, making me feel I was something special, and I thought, why not? I’d had one vision – I swear before God, I did! – and I reckoned that if I just repeated what I’d seen, and made as if I was under the spell again, the rest of the village would be impressed like my neighbours. Only … only …’ A sob broke out of her, shaking the narrow frame.
‘Only what?’ Caliste prompted.
‘Only, soon as I started on my pretend trance, the real one came back,’ Lilas whispered hoarsely, ‘and then it came on me, far worse than before, and I lost myself, my lady; I had no memory of who or where I was, nor what I was saying, and when they told me, afterwards, like, I didn’t recollect a word of it!’
Caliste held the bony old hand in both of hers. She glanced up at Sister Liese, standing quietly at the foot of the bed. The infirmarer gave a faint shrug.
Caliste turned back to the old woman. ‘Lilas, I—’ she began.
But Lilas interrupted her. ‘Oh, my lady, help me!’ she whimpered. ‘I’m so frightened!’
‘You’re safe here,’ Caliste soothed. ‘We’ll—’
‘Not safe! Not ever safe!’ Lilas hissed. ‘
They
heard, see? And now – oh!
Oh!
Now they say I must go with them, I must repeat what I’ve been saying, and they’ll … they’ll …’
But what
they
would do was apparently beyond her. With a soft little cry, Lilas removed her hand from Caliste’s, turned her face to the wall and curled up into a tight little ball.
Silence fell.
Slowly Caliste rose to her feet. ‘She needs rest,’ she murmured. ‘Sleep, preferably.’
‘I will prepare a soporific,’ Sister Liese whispered back. ‘Don’t worry, my lady, we’ll look after her.’ She paused. ‘Do you think she’s putting it on?’ she said, her words all but inaudible.
‘I don’t know,’ Caliste
Caliste frowned. ‘I bow to your experience, Sister,’ she said, ‘and if you have doubts about this woman’s veracity, I will take them seriously.’ She stood up, and the infirmarer instantly did the same.
‘My lady?’ Sister Liese said. ‘Are you going to bed, at last?’
Caliste looked at her in surprise. ‘No, Sister! I’m coming with you to see your patient.’
The long infirmary was dark and quiet as the two nuns slipped inside. A nun sat at the far end, a single candle illuminating the area immediately around her. She stood up as Caliste and Sister Liese walked towards her, and the infirmarer motioned her to sit down again. Sister Liese led the way to a curtained recess at the far end of the room.
Caliste stood looking down at Lilas of Hamhurst. The old woman was awake, lying quite still with her eyes fixed on some point on the wall to her left. Caliste sat down on the edge of the bed.
‘What do you see?’ she asked softly. ‘Do your visions disturb you, Lilas?’
Lilas turned her head. ‘Who are you?’ she whispered. There was fear in her eyes.
‘My name is Caliste, and I am abbess here,’ Caliste said.
Lilas shot out a hand and grasped Caliste’s wrist. ‘I’ve been bad, my lady,’ she whispered. ‘I did have a vision – as God’s my witness, I
did
, I saw … I saw …’ Her face crumpled, and she whimpered in terror. ‘I saw terrible things, and the voices, they went on and on at me, telling me what would happen, saying the land was gone to the bad because we were all sinners, and the greatest of us were the worst sinners of all, and then – oh, I’m sorry, my lady!’ She pulled Caliste’s hand up to her face, kissing it over and over again.
I would send for a priest
,
if I could
, Caliste thought.
Here is a soul in torment, yet the solace of confession is not available to ease her suffering.
She would just have to do her best.
‘What have you done, Lilas?’ she asked quietly.
The old woman shot her a look. ‘I may have exaggerated a bit,’ she muttered. ‘I liked the attention, see. My neighbours, they all fussed round me, making me feel I was something special, and I thought, why not? I’d had one vision – I swear before God, I did! – and I reckoned that if I just repeated what I’d seen, and made as if I was under the spell again, the rest of the village would be impressed like my neighbours. Only … only …’ A sob broke out of her, shaking the narrow frame.
‘Only what?’ Caliste prompted.
‘Only, soon as I started on my pretend trance, the real one came back,’ Lilas whispered hoarsely, ‘and then it came on me, far worse than before, and I lost myself, my lady; I had no memory of who or where I was, nor what I was saying, and when they told me, afterwards, like, I didn’t recollect a word of it!’
Caliste held the bony old hand in both of hers. She glanced up at Sister Liese, standing quietly at the foot of the bed. The infirmarer gave a faint shrug.
Caliste turned back to the old woman. ‘Lilas, I—’ she began.
But Lilas interrupted her. ‘Oh, my lady, help me!’ she whimpered. ‘I’m so frightened!’
‘You’re safe here,’ Caliste soothed. ‘We’ll—’
‘Not safe! Not ever safe!’ Lilas hissed. ‘
They
heard, see? And now – oh!
Oh!
Now they say I must go with them, I must repeat what I’ve been saying, and they’ll … they’ll …’
But what
they
would do was apparently beyond her. With a soft little cry, Lilas removed her hand from Caliste’s, turned her face to the wall and curled up into a tight little ball.
Silence fell.
Slowly Caliste rose to her feet. ‘She needs rest,’ she murmured. ‘Sleep, preferably.’
‘I will prepare a soporific,’ Sister Liese whispered back. ‘Don’t worry, my lady, we’ll look after her.’ She paused. ‘Do you think she’s putting it on?’ she said, her words all but inaudible.
‘I don’t know,’ Caliste
Similar Books
