Sustained,” the judge replied, “Jurors disregard that last statement. Watch it counselor,” the judge said to the defense lawyer.
“ Yes your honor,” he digressed. “Camille, is it true that you used to participate in robberies with Marcus?”
My heart beat out of my chest because I didn’t think that it would come up. That was something that Marcus and I did together a long time before we ever go into drugs. Just like with the drugs, I hadn’t stolen anything but I did help distract people, case their houses, and facilitate the process. I felt like complete shit on the stand, and I did my best to hide my shocked expression. I never told Kyle about that part of my life and all of it was playing out in front of his eyes. I wondered if he thought less of me because of my past. I couldn’t perjure myself and so I had to tell the truth.
“I didn’t steal—,”
“ It’s a yes or no question Camille,” he interjected sternly.
I took a deep breath, “Yes.”
I fought back the tears that were threatening to pour out of my eyes. I felt like I’d completely ruined the case because I wasn’t prepared. I never told the prosecution about my participation in stealing. I knew that they were going to be pissed about that. If Marcus got released because of me I would never forgive myself. The familiar mouthwatering began again, and it was only a matter of time before I had to make my way to the rest room again.
The lawyer wore a cocky expression throughout the rest of my questioning, and I tried not to rush my answers. I answered clear and concisely to each one in the same manner that I did with the prosecution. His case was that since Marcus and I had conspired to rob people before this showed that we were conspiring to rob Kyle also as some sort of “long con”. It is amazing how these lawyers can twist things like this.
I’d mentally checked out. Once I was freed from the stand I went straight to the restroom. My dry heaves were painful because there wasn’t anything in my stomach to release. I didn’t want to return to the courtroom. I was way too stressed but I was finally off the stand and my portion in the entire mess was done. I didn’t want to see Kyle because I was ashamed. But once again he was outside of the bathroom when I emerged.
“Are you okay?”
“ I’m fine,” I said.
“ Maybe you should go home for the rest of the trial. This is just too hard for you and your part is finished.”
I thought that I would have welcomed the opportunity to go home, but my resolved strengthened. Kyle still had to take the stand, and I wanted to be there to support him in the same way that he supported me. I couldn’t let him down.
“No, the worst part is over and I’m going to see this through to the end. I don’t want to have to wait for a phone call or the media to figure out what happened.”
“ That’s my girl,” he said before he kissed my forehead and escorted me back into the courtroom.
Shortly after we returned Kyle took the stand, and he was cool, calm, and collected. He was everything that I wasn’t on the stand and my faith in the case was restored. He had an eloquent and honest answer for every question. When he discussed our relationship my heart swelled with pride and love, and I knew that the jurors couldn’t deny that we genuinely loved one another. What we had wasn’t superficial, and I didn’t appreciate the defense trying to pervert it.
*
The trial was one of the most mentally exhausting times of my life but it was now close to over. Waiting for the jurors to return for the sentencing was long. It took them over 2 hours to reach a verdict. I know that in the grand scheme of things it wasn’t a long time, but it felt like forever. I kept going over all of the mistakes that I made on the stand and cringed. Kyle kept stroking my hand and kissing my temple. He didn’t kiss me on the lips, and I understood why. I mean I had thrown up twice that day and
“ Yes your honor,” he digressed. “Camille, is it true that you used to participate in robberies with Marcus?”
My heart beat out of my chest because I didn’t think that it would come up. That was something that Marcus and I did together a long time before we ever go into drugs. Just like with the drugs, I hadn’t stolen anything but I did help distract people, case their houses, and facilitate the process. I felt like complete shit on the stand, and I did my best to hide my shocked expression. I never told Kyle about that part of my life and all of it was playing out in front of his eyes. I wondered if he thought less of me because of my past. I couldn’t perjure myself and so I had to tell the truth.
“I didn’t steal—,”
“ It’s a yes or no question Camille,” he interjected sternly.
I took a deep breath, “Yes.”
I fought back the tears that were threatening to pour out of my eyes. I felt like I’d completely ruined the case because I wasn’t prepared. I never told the prosecution about my participation in stealing. I knew that they were going to be pissed about that. If Marcus got released because of me I would never forgive myself. The familiar mouthwatering began again, and it was only a matter of time before I had to make my way to the rest room again.
The lawyer wore a cocky expression throughout the rest of my questioning, and I tried not to rush my answers. I answered clear and concisely to each one in the same manner that I did with the prosecution. His case was that since Marcus and I had conspired to rob people before this showed that we were conspiring to rob Kyle also as some sort of “long con”. It is amazing how these lawyers can twist things like this.
I’d mentally checked out. Once I was freed from the stand I went straight to the restroom. My dry heaves were painful because there wasn’t anything in my stomach to release. I didn’t want to return to the courtroom. I was way too stressed but I was finally off the stand and my portion in the entire mess was done. I didn’t want to see Kyle because I was ashamed. But once again he was outside of the bathroom when I emerged.
“Are you okay?”
“ I’m fine,” I said.
“ Maybe you should go home for the rest of the trial. This is just too hard for you and your part is finished.”
I thought that I would have welcomed the opportunity to go home, but my resolved strengthened. Kyle still had to take the stand, and I wanted to be there to support him in the same way that he supported me. I couldn’t let him down.
“No, the worst part is over and I’m going to see this through to the end. I don’t want to have to wait for a phone call or the media to figure out what happened.”
“ That’s my girl,” he said before he kissed my forehead and escorted me back into the courtroom.
Shortly after we returned Kyle took the stand, and he was cool, calm, and collected. He was everything that I wasn’t on the stand and my faith in the case was restored. He had an eloquent and honest answer for every question. When he discussed our relationship my heart swelled with pride and love, and I knew that the jurors couldn’t deny that we genuinely loved one another. What we had wasn’t superficial, and I didn’t appreciate the defense trying to pervert it.
*
The trial was one of the most mentally exhausting times of my life but it was now close to over. Waiting for the jurors to return for the sentencing was long. It took them over 2 hours to reach a verdict. I know that in the grand scheme of things it wasn’t a long time, but it felt like forever. I kept going over all of the mistakes that I made on the stand and cringed. Kyle kept stroking my hand and kissing my temple. He didn’t kiss me on the lips, and I understood why. I mean I had thrown up twice that day and
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