the Atlantic and is now in a country he has always wanted to see, home of so many musicians and esoteric television shows that he watched on late night public television at home.
The walk from customs to the terminal is long. The many tunnel-like hallways are dark, quiet and empty save the recently disembarked passengers of international flights.
The walk through the tunnels ends abruptly at a blind turn that is the entrance to the terminal. Chris is greeted by a throng of faces waiting for loved ones to arrive. He is scrutinized by many, studying him from head to toe, noting his uniform and the country it represents. He was advised not to wear his uniform while traveling overseas, as servicemen had been targets of terrorists in the past, but he never thought to change, nor did he want to. He wanted the world to know he was in the Navy; he wanted the world to know he belonged to something, hang the consequences.
Again, he has time to kill inside the airport, about three hours before his plane to Aberdeen departs.
He converts some money into British pounds and feels cheated when he is given back less than he turned in. He finds a newsstand and buys some newspapers and is surprised at their tabloid appearance. He expects the country to be more intellectual, based on his observations of those whimsical comedies he saw at home.
The contents of the newspapers are meaningless to him. They are laden with stories about politics and places and personalities he has no grasp or knowledge of and the sports pages are also equally dizzying, displaying features on football and snooker and scores and statistics that are difficult to understand.
He returns to the newsstand to find more reading material but instead buys candy with wrappers that he has never seen and cigarettes in odd-shaped boxes with brand names he has never heard of.
So he sits, eating new candy and smoking strong cigarettes, and watches people as they stroll past him. He scrutinizes the young English girls, especially the ones working in the airport, the girls in uniforms behind ticket and gift shop counters. He studies them with longing and wonders if any of them would ever be interested in him.
He thinks about his life, and decides at this moment to never return to Michigan, to never seek out his mother or father or brother.
He is done trying to love anyone who doesn’t love him back, and he is resolved to make a life and a family of his own.
He stares at the girls and sighs.
Christmas, 1985
Dear Wife,
I’m sitting here in London and I can’t see anything as I am stuck inside an airport and if I had any courage I would wander outside and take a cab and try to see something but I don’t so I am just going to sit here and wait for my flight to Scotland, where I am going to be stationed for the next two years.
I am already looking for you, but I think I’ll know when I find you, when it’s for real.
My mother is basically a slut and I’ve finally realized it, she is running off somewhere with some bozo and my father is only interested in existing, I don’t think he has any feelings and I haven’t had a real conversation with him in years. I don’t want my screwed up family to have an effect on me throughout my life, I want to be strong, and I want to be loyal to you and the family I want to have.
I want my children to have something to stand upon, not a family that might disappear in a blink and leave them with nothing. That’s what has happened to me, but I’ll explain more later and you may already know, I may have told you everything before you even read this. Mainly, I want to be a good person, I don’t want to be selfish.
Love,
Chris
Father
The walk from customs to the terminal is long. The many tunnel-like hallways are dark, quiet and empty save the recently disembarked passengers of international flights.
The walk through the tunnels ends abruptly at a blind turn that is the entrance to the terminal. Chris is greeted by a throng of faces waiting for loved ones to arrive. He is scrutinized by many, studying him from head to toe, noting his uniform and the country it represents. He was advised not to wear his uniform while traveling overseas, as servicemen had been targets of terrorists in the past, but he never thought to change, nor did he want to. He wanted the world to know he was in the Navy; he wanted the world to know he belonged to something, hang the consequences.
Again, he has time to kill inside the airport, about three hours before his plane to Aberdeen departs.
He converts some money into British pounds and feels cheated when he is given back less than he turned in. He finds a newsstand and buys some newspapers and is surprised at their tabloid appearance. He expects the country to be more intellectual, based on his observations of those whimsical comedies he saw at home.
The contents of the newspapers are meaningless to him. They are laden with stories about politics and places and personalities he has no grasp or knowledge of and the sports pages are also equally dizzying, displaying features on football and snooker and scores and statistics that are difficult to understand.
He returns to the newsstand to find more reading material but instead buys candy with wrappers that he has never seen and cigarettes in odd-shaped boxes with brand names he has never heard of.
So he sits, eating new candy and smoking strong cigarettes, and watches people as they stroll past him. He scrutinizes the young English girls, especially the ones working in the airport, the girls in uniforms behind ticket and gift shop counters. He studies them with longing and wonders if any of them would ever be interested in him.
He thinks about his life, and decides at this moment to never return to Michigan, to never seek out his mother or father or brother.
He is done trying to love anyone who doesn’t love him back, and he is resolved to make a life and a family of his own.
He stares at the girls and sighs.
Christmas, 1985
Dear Wife,
I’m sitting here in London and I can’t see anything as I am stuck inside an airport and if I had any courage I would wander outside and take a cab and try to see something but I don’t so I am just going to sit here and wait for my flight to Scotland, where I am going to be stationed for the next two years.
I am already looking for you, but I think I’ll know when I find you, when it’s for real.
My mother is basically a slut and I’ve finally realized it, she is running off somewhere with some bozo and my father is only interested in existing, I don’t think he has any feelings and I haven’t had a real conversation with him in years. I don’t want my screwed up family to have an effect on me throughout my life, I want to be strong, and I want to be loyal to you and the family I want to have.
I want my children to have something to stand upon, not a family that might disappear in a blink and leave them with nothing. That’s what has happened to me, but I’ll explain more later and you may already know, I may have told you everything before you even read this. Mainly, I want to be a good person, I don’t want to be selfish.
Love,
Chris
Father
Similar Books
