Read Online The Tao of Stress: How to Calm, Balance, and Simplify Your Life by Robert G. Santee - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Robert G. Santee
Tags: Non-Fiction
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the first step in getting rid of them.
Simply take some time to think about situations in your life where your absolute beliefs and judgments created problems. Did these
thoughts cause the problem or make it worse? Did they make a
straightforward situation much more complex and stressful? Do you
still have these rigid and inflexible thoughts? In your journal, list these problematic absolute beliefs and judgments. Try to come up with at least five. For each one, describe the problems they caused or exac-erbated. Then ask yourself why you still hold these absolute beliefs and judgments.
Two Simple Taoist Guidelines
Guidelines are beliefs, thoughts, and concepts that focus, direct, and motivate our behavior and assist us in solving various problems in an efficient and effective manner. In Taoism, it’s crucial to understand that change is fundamental, that we need to be flexible, and that we need to eliminate problematic absolute thoughts, judgments, and beliefs. It is important to note that Taoist teachings about thinking are always
directly related to feelings and behaviors. They are intimately intercon-nected. Not only do we need to eliminate problematic thoughts, judgments, and beliefs, we also need to replace them with stress- reducing thoughts, judgments, and beliefs, which will have positive effects on our behavior.
Two basic Taoist guidelines regarding the relationship between
thinking and behavior relative to reducing stress are believing in and respecting oneself, and practicing moderation. Following these guidelines will help you simplify not only your thinking, but also your life. As 49
uncorrected proof
The Tao of Stress
a result, they can help ease chronic stress. The following two stories demonstrate how these Taoist guidelines are manifested in behaviors that prevent or reduce chronic stress.
Believing in and Respecting Oneself
The workload at Veronica’s office was quite intense and sometimes
overwhelming. In recent months, two of her coworkers had been terminated, but Veronica kept her job because she did good work in an efficient and effective manner, didn’t doubt herself, didn’t waste time whining, took responsibility for her behavior, was flexible, and loved a challenge.
Veronica believed in herself and operated with an attitude of “I can!”
In contrast, the two people who were let go didn’t work efficiently and effectively, constantly doubted themselves, whined a lot, tended to avoid responsibility, and were rigid. Basically, they operated with an attitude of
“I can’t!”
Although Veronica made very few mistakes, she certainly wasn’t
perfect. But on the rare occasions when she made mistakes, she didn’t lose respect for herself or doubt or chastise herself. She learned from her mistakes, corrected them, and then moved forward. As a result, she didn’t stress herself out.
Veronica also exhibited flexibility by knowing her limits and adapting to challenges in her environment. When she faced a task that was a bit beyond her current skill level, she didn’t take an attitude of “I can’t!”
Rather, her attitude was “I need assistance so I can learn how to do this.”
When she faced a task that was significantly beyond her current skill level, she simply passed it on to someone capable of doing it. In those cases, she didn’t think of herself as a failure, lose respect for herself, or doubt herself. Rather, she continued to respect and believe in herself. In this way, too, she didn’t stress herself out.
Practicing Moderation
Arthur was at least thirty pounds overweight. He didn’t exercise. His eating behaviors were excessive, and his exercise behaviors
50
uncorrected proof
Simplifying Your Thoughts
were deficient. Maria, on the other hand, was at least twenty pounds underweight and seemed to exercise all the time. Her eating behaviors were deficient, and her exercise behaviors were excessive.
Although outwardly they appear very different, both Arthur
Simply take some time to think about situations in your life where your absolute beliefs and judgments created problems. Did these
thoughts cause the problem or make it worse? Did they make a
straightforward situation much more complex and stressful? Do you
still have these rigid and inflexible thoughts? In your journal, list these problematic absolute beliefs and judgments. Try to come up with at least five. For each one, describe the problems they caused or exac-erbated. Then ask yourself why you still hold these absolute beliefs and judgments.
Two Simple Taoist Guidelines
Guidelines are beliefs, thoughts, and concepts that focus, direct, and motivate our behavior and assist us in solving various problems in an efficient and effective manner. In Taoism, it’s crucial to understand that change is fundamental, that we need to be flexible, and that we need to eliminate problematic absolute thoughts, judgments, and beliefs. It is important to note that Taoist teachings about thinking are always
directly related to feelings and behaviors. They are intimately intercon-nected. Not only do we need to eliminate problematic thoughts, judgments, and beliefs, we also need to replace them with stress- reducing thoughts, judgments, and beliefs, which will have positive effects on our behavior.
Two basic Taoist guidelines regarding the relationship between
thinking and behavior relative to reducing stress are believing in and respecting oneself, and practicing moderation. Following these guidelines will help you simplify not only your thinking, but also your life. As 49
uncorrected proof
The Tao of Stress
a result, they can help ease chronic stress. The following two stories demonstrate how these Taoist guidelines are manifested in behaviors that prevent or reduce chronic stress.
Believing in and Respecting Oneself
The workload at Veronica’s office was quite intense and sometimes
overwhelming. In recent months, two of her coworkers had been terminated, but Veronica kept her job because she did good work in an efficient and effective manner, didn’t doubt herself, didn’t waste time whining, took responsibility for her behavior, was flexible, and loved a challenge.
Veronica believed in herself and operated with an attitude of “I can!”
In contrast, the two people who were let go didn’t work efficiently and effectively, constantly doubted themselves, whined a lot, tended to avoid responsibility, and were rigid. Basically, they operated with an attitude of
“I can’t!”
Although Veronica made very few mistakes, she certainly wasn’t
perfect. But on the rare occasions when she made mistakes, she didn’t lose respect for herself or doubt or chastise herself. She learned from her mistakes, corrected them, and then moved forward. As a result, she didn’t stress herself out.
Veronica also exhibited flexibility by knowing her limits and adapting to challenges in her environment. When she faced a task that was a bit beyond her current skill level, she didn’t take an attitude of “I can’t!”
Rather, her attitude was “I need assistance so I can learn how to do this.”
When she faced a task that was significantly beyond her current skill level, she simply passed it on to someone capable of doing it. In those cases, she didn’t think of herself as a failure, lose respect for herself, or doubt herself. Rather, she continued to respect and believe in herself. In this way, too, she didn’t stress herself out.
Practicing Moderation
Arthur was at least thirty pounds overweight. He didn’t exercise. His eating behaviors were excessive, and his exercise behaviors
50
uncorrected proof
Simplifying Your Thoughts
were deficient. Maria, on the other hand, was at least twenty pounds underweight and seemed to exercise all the time. Her eating behaviors were deficient, and her exercise behaviors were excessive.
Although outwardly they appear very different, both Arthur
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