Read Online The Reinvention of Moxie Roosevelt by Elizabeth Cody Kimmel - Free Book Online
Authors: Elizabeth Cody Kimmel
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watch. EE was supposed to start at 3:30, and according to my Timex it was 3:29. I pulled a folded piece of paper out of my pocket, where I’d written down the information for my EE. Dempsey 212. I was in the right room. Unless they’d made a typo on the sheet . . . Was I in the wrong place? How could everyone else have known to find the right room?
I was on the verge of panic when another girl walked into the room. A tiny girl. If I hadn’t known EE was only for freshmen, I’d have guessed she was still in middle school based solely on her height. So when she spoke, she gave me a shock.
“Moxie Kipper? I’m Ms. Hay.”
Ms. Hay? This elfin creature was a teacher? And how did she know I was Moxie?
“Hey,” I said, then winced. It sounded like I was making fun of her name.
She smiled. She had a very wide mouth, or maybe it was normal sized but just looked wide because her head was so small. She had light brown hair in a pageboy, and small brown eyes. Her nose was slightly flat, and one nostril was bigger than the other. She was wearing a shirt woven with some kind of glittery thread, and black bell bottom jeans. Everything about her looked like a mistake. I tried not to stare.
“Welcome to Release Your Inner Stand-Up: Self-Confidence Through Comedy,” Ms. Hay said, standing in the center of the classroom.
“Yes, right,” I said. “I was hoping to talk to you about that before everyone else gets here.”
“Actually, I think you are everybody,” she said, glancing at her clipboard. She held it up to show me. “Yep.You’re it, Moxie Kipper.”
I stared at the clipboard. The wind suddenly left my sails. Because there, as plain as day, was my signature. All theories of clerical errors evaporated.
Good grief. I had signed the wrong clipboard.
Ms. Hay watched me patiently. Here I was, her only taker. It was one thing to complain that the school had made a mistake. But the mistake was mine. I was the only person in the whole school who had signed up for her EE. How could I now tell her that I didn’t want to take the class after all? There was no way for me to know if she’d even let me switch, or if Green You had any room left. The last thing I needed was to make a teacher mad at me this early in the school year.
“Moxie? Did you say you wanted to talk to me about something?”
Tell her , demanded an inner voice. No! You CAN’T tell her , yelled a second inner voice. Say something! cried both voices.
“Um . . . well . . .” I murmured, buying myself a little time.
Ms. Hay gave me an encouraging smile, which, I’m embarrassed to say, only made her look stranger than she already did. I suddenly felt terrible for Ms. Hay. She couldn’t be more than four foot ten. Her eyes were too small and her nose looked squashed down and her clothes were . . . not so good either. Nobody was interested in her class but me, and even I wasn’t interested.
“Well, it’s just that actually, Ms. Hay . . . I’m not very funny.”
Ms. Hay grinned at me. She looked like one of those hobbits from The Lord of the Rings .
“Well now, Moxie Kipper, you just take a seat and let me worry about that.”
What could I do? I wasn’t the kind of person to just walk out and leave her alone with no one enrolled.
So I sat down.
Ms. Hay closed the classroom door and went to the desk by the blackboard. Instead of sitting down behind it, though, she got up on top of it and sat with her legs pulled up under her, ankles crossed and knees pointing out.
“First of all, Moxie, given the—shall we say—exclusive size of the class, maybe you’d like to consider choosing a different seat.”
I was basically sitting as far from Ms. Hay as it was physically possible to get without rearranging the furniture. I got up sheepishly and transferred to the desk closest to her.
My inner voice #1 informed me that this was all my fault, because I had to go and be all nice and refuse to hurt the Hobbit’s feelings. Inner voice #2 told inner
I was on the verge of panic when another girl walked into the room. A tiny girl. If I hadn’t known EE was only for freshmen, I’d have guessed she was still in middle school based solely on her height. So when she spoke, she gave me a shock.
“Moxie Kipper? I’m Ms. Hay.”
Ms. Hay? This elfin creature was a teacher? And how did she know I was Moxie?
“Hey,” I said, then winced. It sounded like I was making fun of her name.
She smiled. She had a very wide mouth, or maybe it was normal sized but just looked wide because her head was so small. She had light brown hair in a pageboy, and small brown eyes. Her nose was slightly flat, and one nostril was bigger than the other. She was wearing a shirt woven with some kind of glittery thread, and black bell bottom jeans. Everything about her looked like a mistake. I tried not to stare.
“Welcome to Release Your Inner Stand-Up: Self-Confidence Through Comedy,” Ms. Hay said, standing in the center of the classroom.
“Yes, right,” I said. “I was hoping to talk to you about that before everyone else gets here.”
“Actually, I think you are everybody,” she said, glancing at her clipboard. She held it up to show me. “Yep.You’re it, Moxie Kipper.”
I stared at the clipboard. The wind suddenly left my sails. Because there, as plain as day, was my signature. All theories of clerical errors evaporated.
Good grief. I had signed the wrong clipboard.
Ms. Hay watched me patiently. Here I was, her only taker. It was one thing to complain that the school had made a mistake. But the mistake was mine. I was the only person in the whole school who had signed up for her EE. How could I now tell her that I didn’t want to take the class after all? There was no way for me to know if she’d even let me switch, or if Green You had any room left. The last thing I needed was to make a teacher mad at me this early in the school year.
“Moxie? Did you say you wanted to talk to me about something?”
Tell her , demanded an inner voice. No! You CAN’T tell her , yelled a second inner voice. Say something! cried both voices.
“Um . . . well . . .” I murmured, buying myself a little time.
Ms. Hay gave me an encouraging smile, which, I’m embarrassed to say, only made her look stranger than she already did. I suddenly felt terrible for Ms. Hay. She couldn’t be more than four foot ten. Her eyes were too small and her nose looked squashed down and her clothes were . . . not so good either. Nobody was interested in her class but me, and even I wasn’t interested.
“Well, it’s just that actually, Ms. Hay . . . I’m not very funny.”
Ms. Hay grinned at me. She looked like one of those hobbits from The Lord of the Rings .
“Well now, Moxie Kipper, you just take a seat and let me worry about that.”
What could I do? I wasn’t the kind of person to just walk out and leave her alone with no one enrolled.
So I sat down.
Ms. Hay closed the classroom door and went to the desk by the blackboard. Instead of sitting down behind it, though, she got up on top of it and sat with her legs pulled up under her, ankles crossed and knees pointing out.
“First of all, Moxie, given the—shall we say—exclusive size of the class, maybe you’d like to consider choosing a different seat.”
I was basically sitting as far from Ms. Hay as it was physically possible to get without rearranging the furniture. I got up sheepishly and transferred to the desk closest to her.
My inner voice #1 informed me that this was all my fault, because I had to go and be all nice and refuse to hurt the Hobbit’s feelings. Inner voice #2 told inner
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