“I’ll be in the kitchen if you need anything,” I said quietly, and then left him to do his private investigating.
In the kitchen, I continued to clean what was left from our lunch and then, for the second day in a row, decided to indulge in a drink. Not feeling like putting in too much effort, I simply grabbed some orange juice from the refrigerator and poured some in a glass, then added a generous portion of vodka. I sat down on one of the barstools that lined the long side of the island and listened for sounds of Preston rummaging through my marriage.
I couldn’t imagine what he thought he would find in our bedroom that I might not have seen, might not have caught on to. He wouldn’t find any evidence of a loving relationship; that was for sure. There would be no sexy underwear in the hamper, no rumpled sheets on the bed. No, I imagined from his perspective he would see a very sterile room and pity my husband for having such a frigid wife.
I was halfway through my drink when I heard him come back into the kitchen.
“I think I’m about through here. Sorry for the intrusion.”
I got the feeling he was referring to more than just interrupting lunch.
“It’s no problem. Find what you were looking for?”
“Not sure yet,” he said, seriously, his eyes locked on to mine. I simply couldn’t handle his eyes on me, not when they were full of words that I felt he wanted to say but held back. No, it was time to say goodbye to Preston Reid.
“Sam isn’t back yet, but I’ll be sure to get you the money soon. I could drop it by the office later today if that’s more convenient for you.”
“No, don’t take it to the office. I’ll be in contact. I’m not worried about the money.”
“All right,” I said. “Let me walk you to the door.” I stood and made my way past him, leading him back into the foyer. I reached for the door handle but stopped when I heard his voice again.
“Was staying with him this long, suffering through what seems like a loveless marriage, really worth the money you’re fighting for now?”
I stared at him, trying not to let my face give away the array of emotions his question sent spinning around in my head.
“I didn’t realize, until just recently, I was in a loveless marriage.” I looked him straight in the eye, my face expressionless, steeled to look void of anything. Without removing my eyes from him, I turned the doorknob and opened the door. He obviously took my silence as the only farewell he would be getting and he walked through.
I tried not to notice that even though he had plenty of room, he passed so close to me that I felt his shoulder brush me again. I also tried to ignore what his scent did to me, as well as the jolt that zipped through me when my body touched his.
Chapter Seven
The next night, I laid in bed and listened for Derrek to return. Preston hadn’t said whether Derrek had gone to Bend alone. I wasn’t even sure he knew, but I had spent over a day imagining the happy couple enjoying a short weekend getaway. Perhaps he’d taken his youngest to her first skiing lesson, watching her wobble and fall in the soft snow, her nose turning pink from the cold.
I had always told Derrek I wanted children, and he’d always gone to great lengths to convince me that we had time. He wanted to focus on his job and he needed me to help him with that aspect of our life. I wasn’t, by any means, past my prime, and still had a few good baby-making years left in me. But knowing he’d started a family with someone else, that he’d taken my ability to start a family hostage, left my heart pumping in an empty chest. I was angry, but more so, I was hurt.
I’d always imagined having a few babies. I’d daydreamed about holding the warm bundles in my arms, snuggling them, kissing them, but now I was left with nothing. Well, nothing besides a cheating husband who planned to
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