Read Online The Nose from Jupiter by Richard Scrimger - Free Book Online Page B

loves everybody. Maybe it would be nice to hear her say she loves me more than anyone else … more than her work, anyway. But I don’t
worry
about her love. Maybe because she’s there day after day telling me to tidy my room. Maybe because moms are, well, moms. But my dad … would it hurt him to give me a hug? One hug? To tell me he loves me? Oh well.
    It was a really nasty storm. The sky opened up like a cardboard carton and poured rain all over everything. The wind rattled the windows and moaned around the chimney.
    “Listen to that weather,” my mom said, tucking me into bed. “Sounds like winter’s coming pretty soon.”
    “I’m glad I’m inside,” I told her. She kissed me and closed the door on her way out.
    –
No night for nose or beast
, said Norbert.
    Mom poked her head back in. “Did you say something?”
    “Just goodnight,” I said.
    “Night.”

Way to Go, Squeaky!
    The next day was bright and still, and the ground was covered in frost. My feet sounded like I was walking on tiny fragments of broken glass as I made my way down our street to Victor’s. His mom opened the door.
    “Hello there, you darling boy,” she said with a bigger-than-usual smile for me. “Victor’s already gone to school,” she said. “He took a lift with his father this morning.”
    “Oh.” I wondered what was going on. Victor hated driving with his dad in the grocery van. Usually he waited for me. “I’ll be going then,” I said.
    “I hope you enjoy your assembly this afternoon. I hear she’s really something. I’m that tempted to go myself.”
    I wondered who Mrs. Grunewald was talking about. I waved good-bye and left.
    I walked the long way to school again, arriving with not much time to spare. The playground was a hive of gossip. Groups of kids and teachers buzzed at each other, broke off, and reformed in different groups.
    “I hope she sings ’Don’t Be Stupid.’”
    “I hear she’s going to try out something new.”
    “What’ll she wear?”
    “… been going through old yearbooks and I can’t find her.”
    “Maybe it’s not her real name.”
    Who were they talking about? I went up to the nearest group and asked what was going on. “Haven’t you heard?” they said. “Don’t you know about the special guest at our assembly?”
    “Someone who used to go to school here,” I said. “I didn’t hear who.”
    “Well, it’s –”
    The lineup bell rang, and my informant ran away without telling me.
    I found Victor in line. “What happened to you this morning?” I asked. “I went by your place and your mom said you’d already left.”
    “Sorry, Alan. It’s just that … I was worried. You know the Cougars have sworn to get you for making all those comments during the game yesterday.”
    “Oh.”
    “Why did you do it, Alan? You made them so mad. Prudence especially. You know her … she’s going to kill you. And I … I didn’t want her to think…”
    “That you were a friend of mine? In case she kills you too?”
    “Well… yes.”
    “Oh,” I said.
    “Just until she beats you up. Then I’ll walk to school with you again.”
    “Thanks a lot, Vic.”
    “Unless you can’t walk. Then you and I can both get a lift with my father. In the van.”
    I nodded. “Thanks. And smell like onions?”
    His face fell. He looked up and down the line, and then surreptitiously sniffed his hands and under his arms. “Is that what I smell like? Honest?”
    Poor Victor. “I was just kidding,” I said.
    “No, really, don’t kid me about this. Do I smell like onions?”
    A teacher told us to find our places in line. I left Victor sniffing and asking the guy behind him if he smelled onions.
    “Hi,” said Miranda. I said “Hi” back, and slipped in behind her.
    “Going to be a great assembly,” she said. “I’m so glad we won the intramural trophy. She’s going to present it to us … and shake our hands. Isn’t that great?”
    “Who?” I asked. “Who are we all talking