Read Online The Middle of Everywhere by Mary Pipher - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Mary Pipher
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were discouraged by the big classes, the hard lessons, and the difficulties in finding time to study. Just coping with America took all their energy.
Tanya said they were exhausted after a day's work and the drive across town in rush hour traffic. Sometimes one of them would be kept late, and since they had only one car, the others would have to wait in the parking lot. Tanya felt demeaned by the work and insulted by the way she was asked to do things. She asked me for help controlling her temper. Nasreen worried about her credit-card bill with its high interest. She sighed. "I work all the time and I can never pay all my bills."
The older sisters had even considered returning to Pakistan or India, but Shireen and Meena wanted to stay in America. I worried about the possibility that the family would split up. Leila said, "Don't worry. We decided to always stick together."
Everyone groaned and laughed at the same time. We moved on to other topicsâthe quirks of our language, the geography and politics of America. The sisters reminded me of baby birds with open mouths hungry for food, only they had open hearts and minds and they were hungry for information. Their questions never stopped. "What's the name of that flower? What's the best way to drive to work? Is that the generator for your heat and air-conditioning unit? What is the purpose of a Pap smear? When does the Immigration and Naturalization Service send the permanent residency card?" They knew what they didn't know and they knew how to ask questions. This is a set of skills not all newcomers have.
Nasreen was upset by President Bush's bombing of Baghdad during the Gulf War and also by a news story about Kurdish refugees in a boat who had washed up in France. Seeing these incidents on television made them all realize how lucky they were, but also how badly the Kurds had it everywhere.
My friend Jill had baked us a sweet potato pie and the sisters sampled it carefully. Meena pronounced it tasty. She gave me a beautiful card thanking me for helping her learn to drive.
Soon Zeenat and the sisters were dancing Kurdish dances in our living room. They stood side by side, arms behind their backs, moving their hips and feet in a vigorous dance. Tanya then did her imitation of American sexy dancing. I jokingly warned her to not do it in public.
While the others dealt with trick-or-treaters, Meena and I did dishes. We talked about time lines and I made the point that most lives alternate between easy and hard times. Meena looked at me and said with no self-pity, "Never in my life have I had one day that has been easy."
The trick-or-treaters were great fun. The sisters enjoyed every child, admiring each, discussing costumes, and laughing at the remarks the kids made. I hadn't enjoyed a Halloween as much since my kids were young.
I taught the sisters to play bingo. They loved it and happily called out, "Bingo." The prizes were embarrassingly small. I had gathered up the soaps, shampoos, lotions, and even mouthwashes from hotels I had stayed in and I'd put them in a hat. Whoever won a bingo, got her choice. The sisters agonized over their selections. They were excited and grateful for these gifts. I was almost chagrined by their gratitude, but I was having too much fun to be really upset. The evening passed, punctuated by a chorus of "Happy Halloween," "Trick or treat," "Say cheese." "Bingo."
SHIREEN'S ENROLLMENT IN COMMUNITY COLLEGE
Shireen and I had spent hours touring local campuses, reading catalogs, and filling out forms. The process of deciding on a college, getting relevant information for enrollment, and getting moneys arranged had been cumbersome. I was struck by how much there is to know about college. For example, whom do you call for information?; how do you arrange a tour?; how do you enroll?; what are the deadlines?; what do you put in the essays?; where, when, and how do you apply for funds?; what is a major?; what are prerequisites?; and how do you read a
Tanya said they were exhausted after a day's work and the drive across town in rush hour traffic. Sometimes one of them would be kept late, and since they had only one car, the others would have to wait in the parking lot. Tanya felt demeaned by the work and insulted by the way she was asked to do things. She asked me for help controlling her temper. Nasreen worried about her credit-card bill with its high interest. She sighed. "I work all the time and I can never pay all my bills."
The older sisters had even considered returning to Pakistan or India, but Shireen and Meena wanted to stay in America. I worried about the possibility that the family would split up. Leila said, "Don't worry. We decided to always stick together."
Everyone groaned and laughed at the same time. We moved on to other topicsâthe quirks of our language, the geography and politics of America. The sisters reminded me of baby birds with open mouths hungry for food, only they had open hearts and minds and they were hungry for information. Their questions never stopped. "What's the name of that flower? What's the best way to drive to work? Is that the generator for your heat and air-conditioning unit? What is the purpose of a Pap smear? When does the Immigration and Naturalization Service send the permanent residency card?" They knew what they didn't know and they knew how to ask questions. This is a set of skills not all newcomers have.
Nasreen was upset by President Bush's bombing of Baghdad during the Gulf War and also by a news story about Kurdish refugees in a boat who had washed up in France. Seeing these incidents on television made them all realize how lucky they were, but also how badly the Kurds had it everywhere.
My friend Jill had baked us a sweet potato pie and the sisters sampled it carefully. Meena pronounced it tasty. She gave me a beautiful card thanking me for helping her learn to drive.
Soon Zeenat and the sisters were dancing Kurdish dances in our living room. They stood side by side, arms behind their backs, moving their hips and feet in a vigorous dance. Tanya then did her imitation of American sexy dancing. I jokingly warned her to not do it in public.
While the others dealt with trick-or-treaters, Meena and I did dishes. We talked about time lines and I made the point that most lives alternate between easy and hard times. Meena looked at me and said with no self-pity, "Never in my life have I had one day that has been easy."
The trick-or-treaters were great fun. The sisters enjoyed every child, admiring each, discussing costumes, and laughing at the remarks the kids made. I hadn't enjoyed a Halloween as much since my kids were young.
I taught the sisters to play bingo. They loved it and happily called out, "Bingo." The prizes were embarrassingly small. I had gathered up the soaps, shampoos, lotions, and even mouthwashes from hotels I had stayed in and I'd put them in a hat. Whoever won a bingo, got her choice. The sisters agonized over their selections. They were excited and grateful for these gifts. I was almost chagrined by their gratitude, but I was having too much fun to be really upset. The evening passed, punctuated by a chorus of "Happy Halloween," "Trick or treat," "Say cheese." "Bingo."
SHIREEN'S ENROLLMENT IN COMMUNITY COLLEGE
Shireen and I had spent hours touring local campuses, reading catalogs, and filling out forms. The process of deciding on a college, getting relevant information for enrollment, and getting moneys arranged had been cumbersome. I was struck by how much there is to know about college. For example, whom do you call for information?; how do you arrange a tour?; how do you enroll?; what are the deadlines?; what do you put in the essays?; where, when, and how do you apply for funds?; what is a major?; what are prerequisites?; and how do you read a
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