about tonight,” Claire spoke and became as nervous as she had been earlier.
“Listen, Daniel, I want you to know that you can stop me anytime. Right now, if you choose, and I will completely understand. This has been my doing, and I maybe shouldn’t have dragged you in. I wouldn’t have if I didn’t think it would help the children a little.” Guilt showed on her face as she struggled for the appropriate apologies.
“Claire, I guess I just don’t totally understand the benefits of them coming here yet.”
Sitting on the foot of the bed, she motioned for him to join her, knowing that the conversation was required but would be difficult.
“I thought these kids were really sick. I guess I’m just a little curious how this room can help them.”
Claire stared at the floor, then into his eyes, and took his hand, “Do you understand what I really do for these children?”
“Yes, you are a nurse. You take care of them and try to make them better,” he replied, as though defining her job to a classroom.
“No, Daniel. I’m a nurse for terminally ill children. My job is to make them comfortable while they pass on.”
Daniel surveyed the equipment just delivered in a completely new manner. He now realized that the room wasn’t meant to help anyone get better, but to comfort them before death. He left the room immediately, went quickly downstairs, and out onto the front porch.
After allowing him a moment of solitude, Claire walked up behind him. “I can still call the whole thing off. It’s not too late, really.”
“Why here, though? There must be better equipment, or drugs or doctors and stuff, at the hospital?”
“Equipment for what, Daniel? There is nothing we can do for these children.”
Claire took his hand. “I want to show you something.” She walked him to her car.
A quiet drive was just what Daniel needed to allow all of his thoughts to digest. He didn’t ask where they were going, trusting that Claire had a purpose for the unscheduled journey back to town.
When they arrived at the familiar location, his nerves tightened in anticipation of what he might have been brought here to see. As they walked through the hospital, their hands were locked tight. Daniel glanced into every room they passed until they came upon one that was empty. Claire entered it first and opened the blinds to the small hazy windows; then she asked Daniel to have a seat on the bed.
“Look around this room, Daniel.”
He did but seemed unimpressed and missed Claire’s point.
“Now, see out the window.” Daniel noticed a few empty spaces in the parking lot and a man dumping the trash.
“This is how most of the children in here spend their last day. Seeing this room and outside this window.”
There was a moment of silence while Daniel tried to register his thoughts.
“I want these kids to feel alive. For once in their horrible pain, I want them to feel alive. The way they could in your room.”
Her message was received. His eyes told her that he now understood. It was all right to proceed with the plan.
“But I have to tell you, Daniel, it isn’t easy to watch this process. You have to be strong for the children, so they don’t fear anything themselves. If it becomes too much, you have to tell me and we can stop the visits. Promise me, okay?”
“Yes, as long as you are there with me, I think I will be all right.”
She touched his face and smiled tenderly. They moved closer toward each other, their lips eager, but they were interrupted by a patient being wheeled into the room.
“Hello, Claire,” one of the nurses said.
She responded gracefully, instantly catching herself from her unexpected behavior within the hospital walls. She took Daniel by the hand and quickly returned to the car for the drive back to the house.
Once they arrived, she thanked him again and told him to call her at work if he had any problems. Brenda’s words came back to him like a flash. “Right, so you won’t be here
“Listen, Daniel, I want you to know that you can stop me anytime. Right now, if you choose, and I will completely understand. This has been my doing, and I maybe shouldn’t have dragged you in. I wouldn’t have if I didn’t think it would help the children a little.” Guilt showed on her face as she struggled for the appropriate apologies.
“Claire, I guess I just don’t totally understand the benefits of them coming here yet.”
Sitting on the foot of the bed, she motioned for him to join her, knowing that the conversation was required but would be difficult.
“I thought these kids were really sick. I guess I’m just a little curious how this room can help them.”
Claire stared at the floor, then into his eyes, and took his hand, “Do you understand what I really do for these children?”
“Yes, you are a nurse. You take care of them and try to make them better,” he replied, as though defining her job to a classroom.
“No, Daniel. I’m a nurse for terminally ill children. My job is to make them comfortable while they pass on.”
Daniel surveyed the equipment just delivered in a completely new manner. He now realized that the room wasn’t meant to help anyone get better, but to comfort them before death. He left the room immediately, went quickly downstairs, and out onto the front porch.
After allowing him a moment of solitude, Claire walked up behind him. “I can still call the whole thing off. It’s not too late, really.”
“Why here, though? There must be better equipment, or drugs or doctors and stuff, at the hospital?”
“Equipment for what, Daniel? There is nothing we can do for these children.”
Claire took his hand. “I want to show you something.” She walked him to her car.
A quiet drive was just what Daniel needed to allow all of his thoughts to digest. He didn’t ask where they were going, trusting that Claire had a purpose for the unscheduled journey back to town.
When they arrived at the familiar location, his nerves tightened in anticipation of what he might have been brought here to see. As they walked through the hospital, their hands were locked tight. Daniel glanced into every room they passed until they came upon one that was empty. Claire entered it first and opened the blinds to the small hazy windows; then she asked Daniel to have a seat on the bed.
“Look around this room, Daniel.”
He did but seemed unimpressed and missed Claire’s point.
“Now, see out the window.” Daniel noticed a few empty spaces in the parking lot and a man dumping the trash.
“This is how most of the children in here spend their last day. Seeing this room and outside this window.”
There was a moment of silence while Daniel tried to register his thoughts.
“I want these kids to feel alive. For once in their horrible pain, I want them to feel alive. The way they could in your room.”
Her message was received. His eyes told her that he now understood. It was all right to proceed with the plan.
“But I have to tell you, Daniel, it isn’t easy to watch this process. You have to be strong for the children, so they don’t fear anything themselves. If it becomes too much, you have to tell me and we can stop the visits. Promise me, okay?”
“Yes, as long as you are there with me, I think I will be all right.”
She touched his face and smiled tenderly. They moved closer toward each other, their lips eager, but they were interrupted by a patient being wheeled into the room.
“Hello, Claire,” one of the nurses said.
She responded gracefully, instantly catching herself from her unexpected behavior within the hospital walls. She took Daniel by the hand and quickly returned to the car for the drive back to the house.
Once they arrived, she thanked him again and told him to call her at work if he had any problems. Brenda’s words came back to him like a flash. “Right, so you won’t be here
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