gun threat I
could have ever imagined, I stick my frozen lips to his cheek.
I feel how he stones. First, with frightful
rapidity, he catches my arms. It's a split second of hesitation in
his gesture, as if he wants to get away from me. Through in his
eyes, an orange light goes on, almost incandescent, that scares me.
But not enough. When I want to take my lips of his cheek, his face
is moving sideways and he sticks his lips to mine. My heart is
pounding, and I feel my pulse in my eardrum. Like he would be blown
heat in my veins. And under the heavy snow, a poor, thin girl,
wearing a princess dress, and shod in sneakers, gets her first
kiss, for Christmas.
Perhaps there is some truth in what they say.
You know, that this time of Christmas is magical. Perhaps, indeed,
wishes come true. Maybe it's our fault we do not have enough
courage to make wishes.
Dane's arms hold me, pull me over him. Then
he moves his lips in a way as if they sip mine. My lips are frozen.
So are his. When ice sticks ice, you know that the harder they
stick together, harder they detach. Maybe this is the reason why my
mouth straggles from his so difficult.
None of us speaks. While I departed from him
to change, I hear him breathing hard, like a man who is very tired,
or who has made a very big effort. Yet, when I get back with the
dress and put in its box, Dane seems as always.
“Anyway”, I say clearing my throat of
embarrassment “thank you.”
“No.” he said, raising a hand to protest. “I
came here hoping to give you pleasure, hoping to fulfill your
desire. And yet, it was you who made me the best gift ever. If I
say it's the most wonderful Christmas of my entire life, you might
think I'm lying. But believe me when I tell you it's true.”
I didn't know what to say. I nodded my head
in silence. And we've stayed both so, next one to another, watching
the water, which twinkled innocently on snowflakes, while,
inadvertently or not, the back of our hands touched.
Chapter Eight
A couple of days have passed since Christmas.
And although I assure you that I actually went mad with boredom, I
have not ventured to go to the river. For fear of facing Dane. You
know, then, the kiss - accidentally happened, I think - it did not
create such an embarrassment. But as time passed, this feeling grew
until it got huge proportions. So huge, that the thought of facing
Dane fills me with immeasurable embarrassment.
“You really need to wash these…”
My mother's voice is creeping insidiously
into my mind. I look at the pile of clothes resentful. Sure! I was
expected that sometime to have to go to the river. But I was
thinking that more time will pass before that. I sigh. I almost
opened my mouth to refuse to do this. I raise my head to my mother
and I change my mind instantly. Instead of the original aversion to
the idea of going to the river, now I get a feeling of panic. My
mother has her face badly drawn. Her eyes were clogged in the
orbits. She's all skin and bones. Her skin has a yellowish, deadly
pallor. She coughs again. That's a whooping cough that cannot be
stopped.
“Would you just stop that noise?”
My dad’s voice is heard, screaming at my
mother.
“People are trying to sleep over here!”
My skin crinkles of anger, especially when I
saw my mother trying, unsuccessfully, to refrain her cough. The
attempt to refrain more, the worse she comes to coughing. Dad roars
again.
“Did you hear?”
She's very sick. She should go to the doctor.
But we are not among those with insurance. No one will look at her.
In the best case, they will not take notice. Worst, they will
grimace in disgust and throw us out. I don’t even have to think
about pills. For those we need money, and lots of them. I better go
do the laundry.
The fear that I would have met Dane
diminishes as time passes. Usually, as soon as I got here, he
arrives as well. As if he had special radar that would signal my
presence. I put the laundry water. Brrr! It's ice cold! It has
Lisa Black
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Steve Kluger
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Chris Taylor
Jax