one of us
makes a move
to press the button
that would hold them open.
I FEEL AS IF IâM IN A DREAM
The doors slip closed,
like the velvet curtains
of a confessional.
We
are completely
alone.
As we begin
our ascent,
Griffin turns to gaze at me.
I donât know
which is rising fasterâ
the elevator or my blood pressure.
We pass the second floorâ¦
the third floorâ¦
the fourth floorâ¦
And then, without warning, we jolt
to a halt between the fourth
and fifth floors!
I GASP AND STIFLE A SCREAM
My knees
nearly buckle
as a slow smile
spreads across Griffinâs faceâ
a smile
that somehow makes me feel
like heâs the wolf
and Iâm Little Red Riding Hood.
Or maybe Iâm the wolf!
Or⦠shit! Maybe Iâm the grandmotherâ¦
Oh, I donât know.
Itâs all so confusingâ¦
Griffin strokes his chin, studying me.
Then he cocks his head to the side,
points a slender finger at me, and asks,
âIs someone a little claustrophobicâ¦?â
And a split
second laterâ
the lights flicker,
sizzle,
and go out!
âSOMEONEâ IS A LOT CLAUSTROPHOBIC!
But thatâs the least of my troubles.
I am so lit with terror and temptation,
Iâm surprised Iâm not glowing in the dark.
âIâmâ¦fine,â I manage to squeak.
A faint red emergency button
pulses on the wall next to me,
like the dim tip
of a cigarette,
barely casting enough light
for me to make out
Griffinâs silhouette
as he takes a step closer to me.
I scramble to press the button.
Nothing happens.
I press it againâ¦Nothing.
âDamn it!â I hiss.
âAre you okay?â Griffin asks in a throaty voice.
âNo! I am not okay!â I say,
struggling to catch my breath.
âThere are so many reasons I am not okayâ¦â
âDonât worry,â he murmurs, âIâm right hereâ¦â
âI know!â I say, âThatâs one of the reasons!â
And I guess he thinks thatâs pretty funny,
because all of a suddenâ
heâs chuckling.
AND AS SOON AS I HEAR IT
That please-God-make-it-stop
chuckle of hisâ
so shrill, so earsplitting,
so divinely ardor-dampening,
my path
becomes blazingly clear:
if I want to be able
to resist Griffinâs charms
I am going to have to keep him
chuckling.
SOâ¦
Grasping at straws,
I tell him one of the cheesy jokes
the cabbie told me
in the taxi on the way over hereâ
the one about
what the doctor says
to the invisible man in his waiting room:
âSorry. I canât see you now.â
Amazingly, this totally cracks him up!
So I tell him the one about the nurse
who tiptoes past the medicine cabinet because
she doesnât want to wake the sleeping pills.
And the one about
what one doctor says to the other doctor
when they greet each other in the hall:
âYou are fine. How am I?â
But then,
while Iâm wracking my brain
to remember more of the cabbieâs jokesâ
Griffin. Stops. Chuckling.
AND THATâS WHEN I NOTICE IT
Thatâs when I notice
the delicious woodsy scent
of his aftershaveâ¦
pineâ¦
and spiceâ¦and smokeâ¦
and rumâ¦
and⦠oh, geez!
He smells exactly
like Peter Levineâ
the boy
I had an obsessive crush on
in ninth grade!
GRIFFINâS SILHOUETTE GLIDES CLOSER
âI love a woman
with a good sense of humor,â he says.
I tell him my husband does too. But this does not deter him.
He comes closerâ¦
And closer stillâ¦
And, suddenly,
Griffinâs hands are on my shoulders!
âAwâ¦â he says. âYouâre shakingâ¦
You are claustrophobic.â
My heartâs beating so fast
it could win a worldâs record.
âYou need a hugâ¦â Griffin says.
âCome hereâ¦â
He starts to wrap
his arms around me.
And it would be
so easyâ¦
so easy to just let myself
melt into
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