The Hitwoman Gets Lucky (Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman)

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Authors: JB Lynn
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glass?” I suggested. “He likes being able to see out.”
    “Better,” the lizard murmured.
    “How about the coffee carafe?” Patrick asked. “It’s bigger.”
    “Perfect!” God said.
    “Perfect.” I parroted. “But there’s no coffee pot in the room.”
    “I bring my own,” Patrick admitted sheepishly.
    “You bring your own coffee maker?”
    “The best part of waking up is having a decent cup of coffee,” he said defensively. “I’ll clean it out for him.”
    While the hitman rinsed out the coffeepot in the bathroom, I kicked off my shoes and plucked the lizard from my undergarment.
    “He’s not so bad, “ God admitted.
    I didn’t reply. I put him down on top of the dresser so that I could fish around in my bra for the memory stick.
    I’d just picked up God again, when Patrick emerged with the clean pot.
    “I think you should leave him in the bathroom,” he suggested. “That way he won’t be exposed to the draft. Plus there’s one of those fake sun lamp things… He’d probably like that.”
    “I do like him,” God declared. “Brilliant man.”
    “Me too,” I murmured. They each thought I was responding to him.
    While I set up the lizard in his new habitat, Patrick laid out a T-shirt for me on the bed.
    “Shower’s all yours. Feel free to use all the soap and shampoo. The towels too.”
    “Thanks.” Grabbing the T-shirt, I retreated to the bathroom and indulged in a long, hot, sudsy shower.  Knowing that Patrick was on the other side of the door kept it from being as relaxing as it could have been. Not because I expected him to burst in and ravage me, but because I sort of hoped he would.
    He didn’t. He may be a professional assassin and an inept mugger, but he’s a man of his word.
    Retrieving the flash drive from the soap dish where I’d left it for safekeeping, I limped back into the room. Patrick, reclining on the bed, glanced over the top of the newspaper he was reading.
    I was glad I’d shaved my legs that morning.
    “Feet hurt?” he asked studying me.
    “A little.” The T-shirt actually hung lower than the dress had, but I still tugged self-consciously at it.
    “Did you twist your ankle on the beach?”
    I shook my head.
    He frowned. “I really am sorry about how that all went down.”
    “I know.”
    “It didn’t look like O’Hara was suspicious of you.”
    “He wasn’t, but how do you know that?”
    “You didn’t think I left you out there on the beach alone, did you?”
    I hadn’t thought about it. “You followed us? Me?”
    “Uh-huh. Don’t worry. You can relax the rest of your time here. I’ll figure out another way to get the flash drive from him.”
    “That might be harder than you think.”
    “I’m not putting you in harm’s way again.”
    “I meant because his watch ended up in the ocean.” I left out the part where I was the one who’d throw it there.
    “You’re sure?” A hopeful note threaded through his tone.
    “Positive. I saw it wash ashore.”
    “Oh.” His disappointment was palpable.
    “The flash drive was gone.”
    He frowned. “Which means it could be on the beach where any fool could find it. I’ll look for it tomorrow.”
    “Isn’t that like trying to find a needle in a haystack?”
    “I’ve got my metal detector.”
    “Now I know why you bring it with you,” I said with a chuckle.  He’d once used the detector to help me find bullet casings after a shooting lesson. “But I think there’s an easier way.”
    “I’m open to suggestions.”
    I stepped closer. His gaze bored into mine with an intensity that sent a shiver down my spine and made my stomach flutter.
    “I could just give it to you.” I extended the plastic and metal contraption to him.
    His eyes flicked from it to my face. “You’re sure that’s it?”
    “Took it off the chain myself while you two were rolling around in the sand. Threw the watch into the ocean.” I waved it at him.
    He took it carefully.
    “He doesn’t have a back-up,” I

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