The Frog Princess

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Authors: E. D. Baker
Tags: Fiction, Humorous fiction, Fairy Tales, Frogs
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finally drifted off to sleep, it was to dreams of my family's dungeon and large, frog-eating worms that made me itch when they touched me.

Nine
    I t was the itching that woke me the next morning. The rash that I'd predicted the night before covered my back, and no matter how I twisted or turned, I couldn't reach all the itchy spots. I was getting desperate when I finally found that if I twisted around a certain way and rubbed against a bar of the cage, I could relieve some of the worst itching.
    "You look like an old bear when you do that," said a voice from above. "Not that I've seen many old bears."
    A bright shaft of sunlight came through a hole high on the wall, in the general direction from which the voice had come. At first I thought I might be having a divine visitation, but the voice had been high and squeaky, not at all the sort of voice I thought would belong to a divine being. Maybe it's a trick, I thought. But it couldn't be Eadric. He was still sound asleep. It wasn't the witch, either. I could see her lying on her back with her head turned to the side. Her mouth was open, drool trickling onto the thin mattress with the stained gray cover.
    "Where are you?" I asked, squinting through the shaft of sunlight and the dancing dust motes. Other than the cracks in the shutters covering the two windows, the hole in the wall was the only source of light in the room.
    "I'm up here," squeaked the voice. "By the rafters."
    I looked toward the ceiling. A tiny patch of darkness seemed to shift, but I couldn't be sure. "Sorry," I said. "I can't really make you out from here "
    "But I'm right... oh, forget it. Here, is this better?"
    A bit of shadow detached itself from the rafter and flapped down into the dimly lit room. "Oh, my," I said, taken by surprise. It was a bat. As a rule, I didn't like bats, although I'd never encountered one in person before. It -was just that I'd heard so many bad things about them.
    "Are you satisfied yet? Can I go back to my rafter now?" the bat asked.
    "Of course!" I said, embarrassed by my bad manners. "I didn't mean to inconvenience you."
    "Inconvenience! My, aren't you a nice little frog! None of the other idiots around here would ever think about what is or isn't convenient for me. Take that nasty little witch on the bed, for instance."
    I turned toward the witch in the back of the room, afraid that she might be awake and listening. "Don't worry," said the bat. "Vannabe's still asleep. I always know when she's awake, believe me. Anyway, she never thinks about what's convenient for me. It's always 'Go away, ya stupid bat!' or 'Get that bug, ya stupid bat!' If I didn't know better, I'd think my name was Stupid Bat. It isn't, of course. It's Li'l Stinker. That's what my first mistress named me when I was a youngster. Now, that woman was far more considerate. She used to say, 'Li'l Stinker, you'd better get that fat, juicy bug or you won't have any dinner tonight.' See what I mean? She was a much more thoughtful person."
    I was beginning to feel overwhelmed. I had always thought that bats were quiet creatures, but this bat could talk more than anyone I'd ever met.
    I rubbed my back against the bar again. The rash was itching more now and was spreading to my chest.
    "I couldn't help but hear you talking to Vannabe last night," said Li'l. "You can talk to humans, huh? That's too bad. The only humans I can talk to are witches with the talent and that's the way I like it. So, did your friend eat the worm?"
    "He sure did. He ate the whole thing. I was afraid that he'd be poisoned, but he's fine."
    "I wouldn't say that exactly. He's still asleep, isn't he?'
    "Well, yes, but neither of us has gotten much sleep lately. He's really tired."
    "Is that it? Go shake him and wake him up."
    "I was going to let him sleep for a while. He needs his rest."
    "Go shake him now and see what he does."
    "I'd rather not."
    "Just do it! It's for your own good!"
    It was obvious that the bossy little bat was going to pester

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