rear view mirror Justine and I locked eyes, all ten of them, my eight to her two, as she glanced back at Emilia still going berserk beside me.
“Cool it,” Justine said, to Emilia. By now I’d scuttled over to Malcolm’s other shoulder, the one farthest away from Emilia. Then for no good reason that I can think of Malcolm tried to hit me with my own purse and I found myself doing a death defying leap across his back onto Emilia who was trying to speak.
“I hate –“
When I landed on Emi she went crazy.
Her body spasm shook the car as if she’d been tasered and Malcolm began to panic because he couldn’t see what Emilia’s problem was, but I think he’d felt the weight of me crawling on his shoulder. I wanted to jump onto to Justine to get away from these two crazies, but there was a large metal screen between the front and the back seats.
Malcolm sounded like he forced his voice to be calm when he said, “What's the matter with you? Officer? A little help?”
Justine's eyes caught Emilia’s crazy face in the rear view mirror.
“Emilia, you got ants in your pants?”
“A spider! A big effing spider!”
“Oh, that's the bitch that sprayed me!” Malcolm shouted.
Malcolm again stomped his feet in another attempt to squish me.
“Where is she? I'll tear her effing legs off.” By now the entire back seat of Justine’s police car was pure mayhem.
With Malcolm flailing like he’d had a seizure, my purse burst open and when it did Emilia spotted the cans of hairspray from Maisie’s shop. She reached in and pulled one out and let me have it. She doused me full blast with the stuff, all over my hairy eight legged body.
I screamed which came out like a drowning twitter and Emilia really shrieked.
I thought for sure I was done for but the spray transformed me, quickly and before a person could say, WTF, I was sitting in Emilia’s lap with her shrieking right into my nose.
When she opened her eyes and saw me she said, “You're effing heavy. Get off. And careful of the giant spider.”
“Took you long enough!” I replied. I didn’t know what else to say, and I was so relieved to be myself again that I wanted to hug Emilia not fight with her.
“Where’s the spider?” she said to me.
“I’m the spider!” I yelled at her. She looked startled. “I was the spider, but now I’m me,” I said.
Emilia looked stunned.
“Where is she? Give her to me,” Malcolm demanded. I looked for a place to sit far away from him, but there wasn’t much room back there, in fact there was no room. I pushed Emilia toward Malcolm and tried to snuggle up in the farthest corner.
“Cool it back there.” Justine gave us that entire look cops give when they are not going to warn you again.
“Can I sit up there with you?” I asked her. Justine didn’t seem concerned that I’d more or less suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the back of her car.
“You want to be cuffed?” she asked.
I shook my head no.
“Then you stay there.”
I shook my head yes.
Emi leaned over and whispered in my ear. “She’s from the card deck.”
I knew that! Then Justine stared at us in the rear view mirror. Did she hear? Did she know that we knew? Somehow knowing that Justine was a major gave me renewed respect for her. Her magic must be powerful because in my mind she was a real cop, not some bimbo recently released from a deck of cursed tarot cards!
Justine put the car in gear and sped out of there. This was going to be interesting. Was she really going to take us to the police station? I wanted to ask Emilia all these questions, but I didn’t want Justine to listen in, and I had a very strong feeling that Justine was now completely tuned in to the back seat of her police cruiser and knew that we knew her secret, and knew that we too were associated with Maisie’s cursed deck.
To my surprise Justine didn’t go to the station, she chose a scenic route that took her by Maisie’s shop, and lurking
“Cool it,” Justine said, to Emilia. By now I’d scuttled over to Malcolm’s other shoulder, the one farthest away from Emilia. Then for no good reason that I can think of Malcolm tried to hit me with my own purse and I found myself doing a death defying leap across his back onto Emilia who was trying to speak.
“I hate –“
When I landed on Emi she went crazy.
Her body spasm shook the car as if she’d been tasered and Malcolm began to panic because he couldn’t see what Emilia’s problem was, but I think he’d felt the weight of me crawling on his shoulder. I wanted to jump onto to Justine to get away from these two crazies, but there was a large metal screen between the front and the back seats.
Malcolm sounded like he forced his voice to be calm when he said, “What's the matter with you? Officer? A little help?”
Justine's eyes caught Emilia’s crazy face in the rear view mirror.
“Emilia, you got ants in your pants?”
“A spider! A big effing spider!”
“Oh, that's the bitch that sprayed me!” Malcolm shouted.
Malcolm again stomped his feet in another attempt to squish me.
“Where is she? I'll tear her effing legs off.” By now the entire back seat of Justine’s police car was pure mayhem.
With Malcolm flailing like he’d had a seizure, my purse burst open and when it did Emilia spotted the cans of hairspray from Maisie’s shop. She reached in and pulled one out and let me have it. She doused me full blast with the stuff, all over my hairy eight legged body.
I screamed which came out like a drowning twitter and Emilia really shrieked.
I thought for sure I was done for but the spray transformed me, quickly and before a person could say, WTF, I was sitting in Emilia’s lap with her shrieking right into my nose.
When she opened her eyes and saw me she said, “You're effing heavy. Get off. And careful of the giant spider.”
“Took you long enough!” I replied. I didn’t know what else to say, and I was so relieved to be myself again that I wanted to hug Emilia not fight with her.
“Where’s the spider?” she said to me.
“I’m the spider!” I yelled at her. She looked startled. “I was the spider, but now I’m me,” I said.
Emilia looked stunned.
“Where is she? Give her to me,” Malcolm demanded. I looked for a place to sit far away from him, but there wasn’t much room back there, in fact there was no room. I pushed Emilia toward Malcolm and tried to snuggle up in the farthest corner.
“Cool it back there.” Justine gave us that entire look cops give when they are not going to warn you again.
“Can I sit up there with you?” I asked her. Justine didn’t seem concerned that I’d more or less suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the back of her car.
“You want to be cuffed?” she asked.
I shook my head no.
“Then you stay there.”
I shook my head yes.
Emi leaned over and whispered in my ear. “She’s from the card deck.”
I knew that! Then Justine stared at us in the rear view mirror. Did she hear? Did she know that we knew? Somehow knowing that Justine was a major gave me renewed respect for her. Her magic must be powerful because in my mind she was a real cop, not some bimbo recently released from a deck of cursed tarot cards!
Justine put the car in gear and sped out of there. This was going to be interesting. Was she really going to take us to the police station? I wanted to ask Emilia all these questions, but I didn’t want Justine to listen in, and I had a very strong feeling that Justine was now completely tuned in to the back seat of her police cruiser and knew that we knew her secret, and knew that we too were associated with Maisie’s cursed deck.
To my surprise Justine didn’t go to the station, she chose a scenic route that took her by Maisie’s shop, and lurking
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