Read Online The Constant Gardener by John le Carré - Free Book Online
Authors: John le Carré
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it—would make an excellent beginning. Name 'em, shame 'em, chop their heads off and spike 'em on the city gates, says I. The trouble is, it doesn't work. The same List of Shame is published every year in the Nairobi newspapers, and the same Kenyan politicians feature in it every time. Nobody is sacked, nobody is hauled up before the courts.” She hands him a cup, swiveling on her knees to reach him. “But it doesn't bother you, does it? You're a status quo man. That's a decision you've taken. It hasn't been thrust upon you. You took it. You, Sandy. You looked in the mirror one day and you thought: Hullo, me, from now on I'll treat the world as I find it. I'll get the best deal I can for Britain, and I'll call it my duty. Never mind if it's a duty that accounts for the survival of some of the foulest governments on the globe. I'll do it anyway.” She offers him sugar. He silently declines it. “So I'm afraid we can't agree, can we? I want to speak up. You want me to bury my head where yours is. One woman's duty is another man's cop-out. What's new?”
“And Justin?” Woodrow asks, playing his last useless card. “Where does he come into this, I wonder?”
She stiffens, sensing a trap. “Justin is Justin,” she replies warily. “He has made his choices as I have made mine.”
“And Bluhm's Bluhm, I suppose,” Woodrow sneers, driven by jealousy and anger to speak the name he has promised himself he will on no account utter. And she, apparently, has sworn not to hear it. By some bitter inner discipline she keeps her lips tightly closed while she waits for him to make an even bigger fool of himself. Which he duly does. Royally. “You don't think you're prejudicing Justin's career, for instance?” he inquires haughtily.
“Is that why you came to see me?”
“Basically, yes.”
“I thought you'd come here to save me from myself. Now it turns out you've come to save Justin from me. How very laddish of you.”
“I had imagined Justin's interests and yours were identical.”
A taut, humorless laugh, as her anger returns. But unlike Woodrow she does not lose her self-control. “Good heavens, Sandy, you must be the only person in Nairobi who imagines any such thing!” She stands up, the game over. “I think you'd better go now. People will begin to talk about us. I won't send you more documents, you'll be relieved to hear. We can't have you wearing out the High Commissioner's shredder, can we? You might lose promotion points.”
Reliving this scene as he had relived it repeatedly in the twelve months since it had taken place, feeling again his humiliation and frustration and her scornful gaze burning his back as he took his leave, Woodrow surreptitiously pulled open a slim drawer of the inlaid table that her mother had loved and swept his hand round the inside, gathering together anything he found. I was drunk, I was mad, he told himself in extenuation of this act. I had a craving to do something rash. I was trying to bring the roof tumbling round my head so that I would see clear sky.
One piece of paper—that's all he asked as he frantically slewed and skimmed his way through drawers and shelves—one insignificant sheet of Her Majesty's Stationery Office blue, with one side of writing, mine, saying the unsayable in words that for once do not equivocate, do not say, On the one hand this, but on the other hand there's nothing I can do about it—signed not S or SW but Sandy in good, legible script and very nearly the name WOODROW in block capitals after it to show the whole world and Tessa Quayle that, for five deranged minutes back in his office that same evening, with her naked silhouette still taunting his memory, and a king-sized glass of hospitality whisky at his timid lover's elbow, one Sandy Woodrow, Head of Chancery at the British High Commission in Nairobi, performed an act of unique, deliberate, calculated lunacy, putting at risk career, wife and children in a doomed effort to bring his life
“And Justin?” Woodrow asks, playing his last useless card. “Where does he come into this, I wonder?”
She stiffens, sensing a trap. “Justin is Justin,” she replies warily. “He has made his choices as I have made mine.”
“And Bluhm's Bluhm, I suppose,” Woodrow sneers, driven by jealousy and anger to speak the name he has promised himself he will on no account utter. And she, apparently, has sworn not to hear it. By some bitter inner discipline she keeps her lips tightly closed while she waits for him to make an even bigger fool of himself. Which he duly does. Royally. “You don't think you're prejudicing Justin's career, for instance?” he inquires haughtily.
“Is that why you came to see me?”
“Basically, yes.”
“I thought you'd come here to save me from myself. Now it turns out you've come to save Justin from me. How very laddish of you.”
“I had imagined Justin's interests and yours were identical.”
A taut, humorless laugh, as her anger returns. But unlike Woodrow she does not lose her self-control. “Good heavens, Sandy, you must be the only person in Nairobi who imagines any such thing!” She stands up, the game over. “I think you'd better go now. People will begin to talk about us. I won't send you more documents, you'll be relieved to hear. We can't have you wearing out the High Commissioner's shredder, can we? You might lose promotion points.”
Reliving this scene as he had relived it repeatedly in the twelve months since it had taken place, feeling again his humiliation and frustration and her scornful gaze burning his back as he took his leave, Woodrow surreptitiously pulled open a slim drawer of the inlaid table that her mother had loved and swept his hand round the inside, gathering together anything he found. I was drunk, I was mad, he told himself in extenuation of this act. I had a craving to do something rash. I was trying to bring the roof tumbling round my head so that I would see clear sky.
One piece of paper—that's all he asked as he frantically slewed and skimmed his way through drawers and shelves—one insignificant sheet of Her Majesty's Stationery Office blue, with one side of writing, mine, saying the unsayable in words that for once do not equivocate, do not say, On the one hand this, but on the other hand there's nothing I can do about it—signed not S or SW but Sandy in good, legible script and very nearly the name WOODROW in block capitals after it to show the whole world and Tessa Quayle that, for five deranged minutes back in his office that same evening, with her naked silhouette still taunting his memory, and a king-sized glass of hospitality whisky at his timid lover's elbow, one Sandy Woodrow, Head of Chancery at the British High Commission in Nairobi, performed an act of unique, deliberate, calculated lunacy, putting at risk career, wife and children in a doomed effort to bring his life
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