room’s acoustics.
“I can teach, if you want,” he says. “I’ve given flute lessons and piano lessons before, and some percussion. Andmy dad is a music professor, so I have a bunch of theory books.”
“Music theory! We haven’t even thought about that.”
“Well, I don’t have to…”
“No, we should! We should be doing that!”
“But if you already have teachers, I can just help out and do paperwork, or whatever you need,” Johann says. “I guess I’m pretty responsible.”
Responsible.
That is exactly what I need. Johann will let me be my Libra self. He’ll be super-responsible, Hunter will be slightly irresponsible, and I’ll make sure everyone gets along.
“Oh my gosh, I love you!” I exclaim.
Johann, embarrassed, looks down at his clogs. I don’t think he’s the kind of guy you should declare your love for.
CHAPTER 9: HUNTER
“Girls’ Teams Dominate at Homecoming: Femme Fatales of Fall Sports”
“The Boy Recession©” by Aviva Roth,
The Julius Journal
, October
W hat is all this crap?
It’s late October, and I’ve fallen into my habit of arriving to first period fifteen minutes late. But this morning, my dad dropped me off only ten minutes late, so I figured I had time to go to the cafeteria for a bacon-egg-and-cheese.
But when I turn from the main hallway down south, there are green streamers all over and balloons strewn across the floor, impeding my way to bacon-egg-and-cheese. In the cafeteria, I notice another weird thing: Eugene and Chung wearing matching suits.
“Yo, Scarface!” I yell with my mouth full.
I pay for my half-eaten sandwich and walk over to Eugene and Chung.
“Happy homecoming,
mio fratello
!” Eugene greets me.
“What’s going on with this?” I ask him, gesturing to the two of them and their suits.
“With what?” Eugene asks.
But he knows what, because he presses the lapels of his jacket smooth and reaches for his shirt cuffs to make sure they’re sticking out of his jacket sleeves.
“You finally figure out how to clone yourself?” I say, looking from him to Chung.
Chung looks down at Eugene, confused.
“Dude, I’m, like, a foot taller than him,” Chung tells me.
“And you’re Asian,” Eugene adds. He turns to me and asks, “You like my special game-day suit? This isn’t one of my regular suits. We got these specially made for homecoming.”
Eugene’s on the football team now. He still sucks as much as ever, but they took all the guys who tried out, because they were so desperate to fill up the roster. The team has played three games so far, and lost every one. Eugene sits on the bench, but he feels like a badass because he gets to hang out with Chung and those guys.
“You guys go shopping together?” I ask them.
“I got us all a deal from Brooks Brothers,” Eugene says. “They’re our team’s corporate sponsor now. The Senators, brought to you by Brooks Brothers.”
“The Senators? What Senators?”
“Our school mascot, Huntro,” Eugene says. “What are you, a Brazilian exchange student? How long have you been at this school?”
“I sleep through a lot of stuff,” I tell him. Then I think about it for a second and laugh.
“The Senators. Really intimidating,” I tell them. “Look at you guys. You look like fuckin’ senators. I bet you kick some ass in those ties.”
“Hey!” Chung points his finger at me. “These ties are Italian silk.”
“Happy homecoming!”
Bobbi Novak comes bouncing up to us. She’s got her team warm-ups on, and she’s drinking some healthy protein thingy.
“Happy homecoming!” Eugene exclaims, and throws open his arms, forcing Bobbi to hug him. She goes right up and presses her miracle tits against his damned Italian silk tie.
“Were you so tired this morning?” Bobbi asks Eugene.
“We were all up ’til midnight last night, decorating the hallways,” Eugene explains to me.
“Hunter, you have to give us your unbiased opinion,” Bobbi says. “What do you think
“I can teach, if you want,” he says. “I’ve given flute lessons and piano lessons before, and some percussion. Andmy dad is a music professor, so I have a bunch of theory books.”
“Music theory! We haven’t even thought about that.”
“Well, I don’t have to…”
“No, we should! We should be doing that!”
“But if you already have teachers, I can just help out and do paperwork, or whatever you need,” Johann says. “I guess I’m pretty responsible.”
Responsible.
That is exactly what I need. Johann will let me be my Libra self. He’ll be super-responsible, Hunter will be slightly irresponsible, and I’ll make sure everyone gets along.
“Oh my gosh, I love you!” I exclaim.
Johann, embarrassed, looks down at his clogs. I don’t think he’s the kind of guy you should declare your love for.
CHAPTER 9: HUNTER
“Girls’ Teams Dominate at Homecoming: Femme Fatales of Fall Sports”
“The Boy Recession©” by Aviva Roth,
The Julius Journal
, October
W hat is all this crap?
It’s late October, and I’ve fallen into my habit of arriving to first period fifteen minutes late. But this morning, my dad dropped me off only ten minutes late, so I figured I had time to go to the cafeteria for a bacon-egg-and-cheese.
But when I turn from the main hallway down south, there are green streamers all over and balloons strewn across the floor, impeding my way to bacon-egg-and-cheese. In the cafeteria, I notice another weird thing: Eugene and Chung wearing matching suits.
“Yo, Scarface!” I yell with my mouth full.
I pay for my half-eaten sandwich and walk over to Eugene and Chung.
“Happy homecoming,
mio fratello
!” Eugene greets me.
“What’s going on with this?” I ask him, gesturing to the two of them and their suits.
“With what?” Eugene asks.
But he knows what, because he presses the lapels of his jacket smooth and reaches for his shirt cuffs to make sure they’re sticking out of his jacket sleeves.
“You finally figure out how to clone yourself?” I say, looking from him to Chung.
Chung looks down at Eugene, confused.
“Dude, I’m, like, a foot taller than him,” Chung tells me.
“And you’re Asian,” Eugene adds. He turns to me and asks, “You like my special game-day suit? This isn’t one of my regular suits. We got these specially made for homecoming.”
Eugene’s on the football team now. He still sucks as much as ever, but they took all the guys who tried out, because they were so desperate to fill up the roster. The team has played three games so far, and lost every one. Eugene sits on the bench, but he feels like a badass because he gets to hang out with Chung and those guys.
“You guys go shopping together?” I ask them.
“I got us all a deal from Brooks Brothers,” Eugene says. “They’re our team’s corporate sponsor now. The Senators, brought to you by Brooks Brothers.”
“The Senators? What Senators?”
“Our school mascot, Huntro,” Eugene says. “What are you, a Brazilian exchange student? How long have you been at this school?”
“I sleep through a lot of stuff,” I tell him. Then I think about it for a second and laugh.
“The Senators. Really intimidating,” I tell them. “Look at you guys. You look like fuckin’ senators. I bet you kick some ass in those ties.”
“Hey!” Chung points his finger at me. “These ties are Italian silk.”
“Happy homecoming!”
Bobbi Novak comes bouncing up to us. She’s got her team warm-ups on, and she’s drinking some healthy protein thingy.
“Happy homecoming!” Eugene exclaims, and throws open his arms, forcing Bobbi to hug him. She goes right up and presses her miracle tits against his damned Italian silk tie.
“Were you so tired this morning?” Bobbi asks Eugene.
“We were all up ’til midnight last night, decorating the hallways,” Eugene explains to me.
“Hunter, you have to give us your unbiased opinion,” Bobbi says. “What do you think
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