Read Online THE BONDAGE OF LOVE by Yelena Kopylova - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Yelena Kopylova
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it, your dear friend. Sue, would be classed as a nice girl, and yet I've never liked her. She knew too much too young, and she used to pass it on to you, and you used to come home questioning me about certain aspects of a woman's life which you shouldn't have known anything about at that time. And yet, there you are. Sue Bellingham would generally be classed as a very nice girl, and yet I've never thought so and I never shall. And there's talk of her being married, I understand?"
Then had followed a bit of conversation that actually did shock Fiona, for her daughter had said, "May I ask you something, Mam?" And it was odd that, Fiona recalled, these were the same words that her daughter had said some years ago when she wanted her to explain a conversation that she'd had with her dear friend. Sue.
On this occasion Fiona had said, "Come and sit down. Is there something worrying you?"
"No. No. Nothing's worrying me, Mam. There's only one thing I'm sure of, and don't tell me I'm too young to say this, because I'm on sixteen, you know. One thing I'm sure of absolutely, I'll never marry.
All right, all right, Mam, don't look like that and shake your head. I know it inside myself. I made a fool of myself once, and yet when I look back it was very real. And to think of falling in love again and going through
anything like that, it would drive me to suicide. I couldn't bear it. And look what I did, Mam. Just look what I did. I could have killed that girl.
I know now, I could. I was obsessed with him, possessed by him. It could never happen again. Oddly enough I'm not affected at all by boys or young men, no matter how good-looking or attractive they are. There's your new friend's son, Roland Ferndale, causing half the girls in our form to have heart attacks.
They're always on about him. And from what I hear he can pick and choose, and he does, and drops them like spent matches all over the place. "
"Oh," Fiona laughed now, "I wouldn't think he'd have the time. To go by what his mother says, the poor boy has to spend his time cramming."
"Probably. But she doesn't know what he crams into his time, by all the things I hear. Anyway,
that's not the point. The point is, I want to ask you something. Now you won't be shocked? "
"Oh, I likely shall be, dear, but I shall't say anything, I'll try to cover it up."
They pushed at each other, then Katie said, "It's something that Sue said to me."
"Oh, it would be Sue."
"Yes," Katie nodded, 'it would be Sue. I get a little sick of her at times, more than a little sick, but anyway she's going to be married, and she got on about . well," - she shrugged her shoulders 'what happens. She had been talking to her mother about it." Katie stopped here now and to Fiona's eyes she looked very embarrassed. Then she almost brought Fiona to the edge of the couch when she said, "When you first went to bed with Bill, I mean after you were married, of course, was it a long time before you started to think
... well, to think you're in bed with somebody else? Well, just that, a long time to think you're in bed with somebody else?"
"Katie! What are you saying? What are you asking?"
"Just that."
"Well, I don't know what you mean. Tell me what Sue said. Tell me what you mean. Did she say what she was talking about?"
Katie leant back, closed her eyes, and after a moment, she said, "Well, Mam, she said that her mother told her that after a short while she would likely get fed up with what was happening ... in bed ... especially if it was too often and made you tired." Again she stopped and wetted her lips before she said, "Then her mother said, when that happened she had to imagine she was in bed with someone else. She had to pick someone, such as a film star or a ...
well, a coloured man or"
"Wh ... at!" Fiona was on her feet now and Katie was sitting up straight, saying, "I knew you'd be shocked. I knew you'd be shocked."
"I'm not shocked. I'm outraged that that girl... I've never liked that
Then had followed a bit of conversation that actually did shock Fiona, for her daughter had said, "May I ask you something, Mam?" And it was odd that, Fiona recalled, these were the same words that her daughter had said some years ago when she wanted her to explain a conversation that she'd had with her dear friend. Sue.
On this occasion Fiona had said, "Come and sit down. Is there something worrying you?"
"No. No. Nothing's worrying me, Mam. There's only one thing I'm sure of, and don't tell me I'm too young to say this, because I'm on sixteen, you know. One thing I'm sure of absolutely, I'll never marry.
All right, all right, Mam, don't look like that and shake your head. I know it inside myself. I made a fool of myself once, and yet when I look back it was very real. And to think of falling in love again and going through
anything like that, it would drive me to suicide. I couldn't bear it. And look what I did, Mam. Just look what I did. I could have killed that girl.
I know now, I could. I was obsessed with him, possessed by him. It could never happen again. Oddly enough I'm not affected at all by boys or young men, no matter how good-looking or attractive they are. There's your new friend's son, Roland Ferndale, causing half the girls in our form to have heart attacks.
They're always on about him. And from what I hear he can pick and choose, and he does, and drops them like spent matches all over the place. "
"Oh," Fiona laughed now, "I wouldn't think he'd have the time. To go by what his mother says, the poor boy has to spend his time cramming."
"Probably. But she doesn't know what he crams into his time, by all the things I hear. Anyway,
that's not the point. The point is, I want to ask you something. Now you won't be shocked? "
"Oh, I likely shall be, dear, but I shall't say anything, I'll try to cover it up."
They pushed at each other, then Katie said, "It's something that Sue said to me."
"Oh, it would be Sue."
"Yes," Katie nodded, 'it would be Sue. I get a little sick of her at times, more than a little sick, but anyway she's going to be married, and she got on about . well," - she shrugged her shoulders 'what happens. She had been talking to her mother about it." Katie stopped here now and to Fiona's eyes she looked very embarrassed. Then she almost brought Fiona to the edge of the couch when she said, "When you first went to bed with Bill, I mean after you were married, of course, was it a long time before you started to think
... well, to think you're in bed with somebody else? Well, just that, a long time to think you're in bed with somebody else?"
"Katie! What are you saying? What are you asking?"
"Just that."
"Well, I don't know what you mean. Tell me what Sue said. Tell me what you mean. Did she say what she was talking about?"
Katie leant back, closed her eyes, and after a moment, she said, "Well, Mam, she said that her mother told her that after a short while she would likely get fed up with what was happening ... in bed ... especially if it was too often and made you tired." Again she stopped and wetted her lips before she said, "Then her mother said, when that happened she had to imagine she was in bed with someone else. She had to pick someone, such as a film star or a ...
well, a coloured man or"
"Wh ... at!" Fiona was on her feet now and Katie was sitting up straight, saying, "I knew you'd be shocked. I knew you'd be shocked."
"I'm not shocked. I'm outraged that that girl... I've never liked that
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