Read Online The Billionaire's Secret: Billionaire Obsession (Tycoon Billionaires Book 5) by Julie Farrell - Free Book Online
Authors: Julie Farrell
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not the guy I’m looking for.”
“I’m not.”
“Well, there you go. And it’ll take me time before I can trust men again after what Simon did to me.”
Jake’s muscles tensed. “Tell me about what he did.”
A tear slipped down her cheek. “He was so possessive. He wouldn’t let me see my friends. He was manipulative – he would tell me no one else would want me, so I should stay with him. He thought he owned me. I wanted to leave him for so long, then two months ago, after he… well, I knew I couldn’t stay, and this job came up so I left in a hurry.”
“After he what ?”
“He tried to… he put his hands around my throat and squeezed. I thought he was going to throttle me.”
The atmosphere in the room was rigid now. Astrid sensed Jake wasn’t taking this well. “He lives in your hometown?”
She sighed. “Yeah – so I’ll have to see him at some point when I visit my parents. But at the moment, he won’t take no for an answer. He’s always calling me, you know.”
“If I ever see him, I’ll fucking kill him.”
She sat up and wiped away her tear. “Then you’re no better than him.”
He studied her with his big brown eyes. “Astrid, I don’t know what kind of guy you think I am, but I would never hurt a woman. Never. My old man used to rough up my mom, and... It’s just something I couldn’t do.”
“Sorry, Jake – I know you’re nothing like Simon.”
He eased her back into his arms and held her close. They listened to the sounds of the city outside for a moment. Astrid had no idea what the time was, but this really was the city that never slept.
Jake broke the silence. “You’re still being haunted by what he did in more than just in your dreams, right?”
She rested her cheek on his pec, relishing the softness of his skin over the rock-hard muscle. “Yeah. Since he tried to strangle me…” she swallowed the tears prickling her throat… “I feel smothered and claustrophobic. That’s why I walk everywhere and stay away from the crowded streets – I get panicky in enclosed spaces so the subway’s out. Crowds are terrifying. It’s so stupid…”
“You’re okay in the car though?”
“Yeah, because I can get out of a car anytime. The panic comes when I feel there’s no escape, you know? A car can be pulled over. But I can’t ask the subway driver to let me off. It happens when I feel trapped.”
“What happens?”
“Like, this overwhelming feeling of immense terror, seemingly for no reason at all. It’s the fear of fear, not the actual situation. It sounds crazy when I say it out loud like that. But when it’s happening…”
“It must be scary for you.”
“It is. It’s destroying my self-confidence – imagine feeling afraid all the time of just regular things like walking down the street and being on the subway. It’s like he’s still tormenting me even though he doesn’t know where I am.”
“But it’s your own fear that’s the problem now, though? Not Simon.”
“Yeah…” She lifted her head and gazed at his kind face. “You seem to understand what I’m saying.”
“I’m trying to.”
“It’s so nice to be able to talk to you. It’s a relief to tell someone, because it’s the shame of it that keeps it alive – I know I seem like a confident businesswoman, but inside I’m dealing with the random assault of terror on myself – so I try and hide it, pretending it’s not happening. But that makes it worse. I haven’t really told anyone else. I trust you for some reason… I don’t know why.”
She smiled into his eyes, feeling her defenses fall away. It felt wonderful to be vulnerable with another person, rather than trying to be hard and in control all the time.
He caressed her face. “You’ve nothing to be ashamed of, Astrid. He should be ashamed of himself for doing this to you.”
“I’m just so glad he doesn’t know where I live. But sometimes I get the feeling I’m being followed – then when I turn
“I’m not.”
“Well, there you go. And it’ll take me time before I can trust men again after what Simon did to me.”
Jake’s muscles tensed. “Tell me about what he did.”
A tear slipped down her cheek. “He was so possessive. He wouldn’t let me see my friends. He was manipulative – he would tell me no one else would want me, so I should stay with him. He thought he owned me. I wanted to leave him for so long, then two months ago, after he… well, I knew I couldn’t stay, and this job came up so I left in a hurry.”
“After he what ?”
“He tried to… he put his hands around my throat and squeezed. I thought he was going to throttle me.”
The atmosphere in the room was rigid now. Astrid sensed Jake wasn’t taking this well. “He lives in your hometown?”
She sighed. “Yeah – so I’ll have to see him at some point when I visit my parents. But at the moment, he won’t take no for an answer. He’s always calling me, you know.”
“If I ever see him, I’ll fucking kill him.”
She sat up and wiped away her tear. “Then you’re no better than him.”
He studied her with his big brown eyes. “Astrid, I don’t know what kind of guy you think I am, but I would never hurt a woman. Never. My old man used to rough up my mom, and... It’s just something I couldn’t do.”
“Sorry, Jake – I know you’re nothing like Simon.”
He eased her back into his arms and held her close. They listened to the sounds of the city outside for a moment. Astrid had no idea what the time was, but this really was the city that never slept.
Jake broke the silence. “You’re still being haunted by what he did in more than just in your dreams, right?”
She rested her cheek on his pec, relishing the softness of his skin over the rock-hard muscle. “Yeah. Since he tried to strangle me…” she swallowed the tears prickling her throat… “I feel smothered and claustrophobic. That’s why I walk everywhere and stay away from the crowded streets – I get panicky in enclosed spaces so the subway’s out. Crowds are terrifying. It’s so stupid…”
“You’re okay in the car though?”
“Yeah, because I can get out of a car anytime. The panic comes when I feel there’s no escape, you know? A car can be pulled over. But I can’t ask the subway driver to let me off. It happens when I feel trapped.”
“What happens?”
“Like, this overwhelming feeling of immense terror, seemingly for no reason at all. It’s the fear of fear, not the actual situation. It sounds crazy when I say it out loud like that. But when it’s happening…”
“It must be scary for you.”
“It is. It’s destroying my self-confidence – imagine feeling afraid all the time of just regular things like walking down the street and being on the subway. It’s like he’s still tormenting me even though he doesn’t know where I am.”
“But it’s your own fear that’s the problem now, though? Not Simon.”
“Yeah…” She lifted her head and gazed at his kind face. “You seem to understand what I’m saying.”
“I’m trying to.”
“It’s so nice to be able to talk to you. It’s a relief to tell someone, because it’s the shame of it that keeps it alive – I know I seem like a confident businesswoman, but inside I’m dealing with the random assault of terror on myself – so I try and hide it, pretending it’s not happening. But that makes it worse. I haven’t really told anyone else. I trust you for some reason… I don’t know why.”
She smiled into his eyes, feeling her defenses fall away. It felt wonderful to be vulnerable with another person, rather than trying to be hard and in control all the time.
He caressed her face. “You’ve nothing to be ashamed of, Astrid. He should be ashamed of himself for doing this to you.”
“I’m just so glad he doesn’t know where I live. But sometimes I get the feeling I’m being followed – then when I turn
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