Read Online Tap Out by Eric Devine - Free Book Online

place behind me. I take my shoes off, tuck them under my bed, and then walk across the hall. I ignore the music and the way I feel. Well, at least I stuff it down so it’s not filling my head. I’ve learned enough to know that at this point there’s nothing I can do but wait. Wait for it to turn ugly again. Wait for her to need help. Will I give it this time?
    I sit on the toilet and wait for the water to heat. My body’s sore all over, but in a good way. Like I’ve done something useful. I could do this MMA shit, not because Big O wants me to or because of what Coach said, or because of Rob, or even because it’s smart with Cameron’s ass around, but because I liked it. The entire time I was there, before Dave showed up, I wasn’t thinking about this shit at home. It’s like I was someone else, not this piece of trash kid from the park. Because that’s all I am to everyone. And that’s why Char’s dad offered to let us party. He knows what we are. Our options are almost nonexistent.
    But I can’t get excited about this. I can’t get wrapped up in another fantasy about how this could be a way out, like it may be for Rob. No, I can’t go stupid, thinking like I do about fucking up Cameron. Coach Dan’s running a business, and Big O’s paying. I’m there to keep Rob from getting fucked over by me. In the end I’ll owe somebody for the chance I’ve been given, even if I am being used. If I’ve learned anything, I know nothing in this world’s for free. Except pain.

6
    I t’s Monday. Mom’s door is closed, and Cameron’s whining snore is ripping on the other side. They got high and stayed high all fucking weekend. Must be nice.
    The good thing about them getting lifted is that there’s food in the house: a box of Ding Dongs, a bag of salt and vinegar chips, and in the fridge, some cheese slices and a gallon of milk. I eat two packs of Ding Dongs and every bite makes my body tingle. I can’t remember when I ate last. I didn’t dare eat Cameron’s food with him around. Too risky. Mostly I just hung out with Rob and did jack shit.
    I wash the cake down with two glasses of milk and for once I feel full. I slide into my ratty hoodie and head out the door.
    Amy’s not out, so I walk alone. I pass Charity’s, and the bikes are still outside. I hope she is at her grandma’s, unless it’s like my own. A worse park than this.

    The bell rings, and I snap awake, slumped on my desk. I push up and Lance’s room is a blur. I blink my eyes, but can’t seem to get right. I stagger out of the room. Lance watches me but doesn’t say a word.

    I head straight to the bathroom because I gotta piss so bad I’ve got a semi. I drain the captain, wash my hands, turn for a towel, and there’s Dave, staring at me like a shit he just can’t get to flush.
    â€œâ€™Sup, Tone?”
    â€œâ€™Sup, Dave?” My hands drip. All I want to do is dry them, but I let them hang at my sides.
    â€œSo you gonna throw down with us or was last night too much?”
    My body tenses. “Don’t know yet.”
    He laughs, exposing his pointy teeth. His breath is hot in my face and smells like cinnamon. He chews his gum with his mouth open, and I’d like to put an elbow through it. “Don’t know? Huh. What’s there to know, you fucking pussy?” He waits for my answer. Cocks his head. “That’s what my uncle says you are.”
    I flash hot but then see Cameron lying on my mom’s bed, stoned, staring at the ceiling like some roach on its back. I could have dropped him without trying. I don’t say anything, though. Feeding Dave would only bring some back to Cameron.
    â€œGood at staying quiet.” Dave squints.
    â€œWe done?” This sounds tough as shit, but, really, I know that my legs can’t take much more of this stare down, and if I buckle in front of