“Your majesty…?”
A gasping noise escaped her, and she shook her head. “Don’t call me that.”
He paused.
“Don’t…” she continued, holding a hand up to stave off the words as her gaze dropped to the ground. “Don’t…”
“It is who you are,” he said slowly.
“No, it’s not!”
Fire rushed out of her, bursting against his defenses before fading as quickly as it had come.
Choking on her own air, she crushed the magic down, staring at the floor.
“I’m just me,” she whispered. “I’m not… I’m just…”
Warily, he lowered the barrier of energy surrounding him as she trailed off. For a moment, he remained motionless, and then slowly, he crossed the room and sank down onto the bedside.
“Your father never wanted to be king either, you know,” he said softly.
Trembling, she glanced up at him.
A touch of a rueful smile ghosted over his lips. “He was second in line to the throne,” Cornelius continued. “And he was happy to keep it that way. Your uncle, Alexander… now he wanted to be king. He’d been born to it. At least, that’s what your father used to say.”
He looked down at her, seeing the questions in her eyes.
“My family has been close to the throne for generations,” he explained. “And as a result, every so often, your father confided in me. He trusted me.” A pensive look crossed his face. “Most of the time.”
He drew a breath. “I do not know if you remember,” he said. “I know what happened to you at the start of the war. But I was there the night most of the royal family died. I stayed with you and your sister.”
She nodded faintly. “I remember,” she whispered.
“It scared your father, what happened to you. That much magic, ripping through a young child… it left your sister stripped of everything but a shadow of her power, and you nearly a vegetable. For hours, he refused to leave your side, even to address the needs of his people, suddenly embroiled in a war. In the end, he had twenty of us stand guard that night, though I was the only one out in the open.”
Her brow drifted down. “‘That much magic’?” she repeated.
“The spell. Or truly, the backlash of it. God knows how much magic, hundreds of years old, released in a single moment when the Taliesin king shattered the spell. The binding that held their magic was tied to your line, carried on specifically by those who remained part of the royal family itself. And in a moment, most of them were gone. The effects rebounded through the survivors, almost incapacitating Patrick and sending you into a short-lived coma.
“He thought you were dead. And I do not think he was ever as relieved as in the moment when you woke, even in the midst of everything else occurring at the time.”
Cornelius fell silent, remembering, and Ashe looked away.
“Must’ve been convenient…” she whispered after a moment.
His brow drew down in confusion and she gestured distractedly to herself.
“You mean what happened to your memories,” he said, only partly asking.
She didn’t answer. For a few seconds, he was quiet.
“Yes,” he replied. She glanced at him. “But not for the reasons you think. Darius was not entirely correct in his description of why your father kept you from the war. It’s true a bound wizard is not as noticeable as an unbound one, and that some part of the emergency plan consisted of you and your sister hiding till help could arrive.
“But that was not his true purpose.
“Your father hated what happened to you. It tortured him inside. But it gave him the chance to protect you in a way that otherwise would never have been possible. The king believed that if he helped you remember what it was to be part of our world – and if you had access to all you could do – sooner or later you would insist on being involved in the war. You would want to help him. And that meant watching you fight. Kill. And possibly lose your life.
“He couldn’t stand the thought of you
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