dance, it would’ve been easy to mistake them for lovers, Trey’s hands gliding onto Elisa’s naked back. But they weren’t lovers. Not yet, anyhow. I watched his hands slowly move around her waist before sliding down onto the swaying curves of her hips, clutching at the smooth fabric of her dress, pulling it taut across her ass. Her buttocks were soft and full, and for just an instant Trey’s hands seem to hold them before moving quickly up her back, letting her dress fall free. For a moment, the bodies surrounding them parted and Elisa’s eyes met mine. In them I could see that she knew I was right, that what I had been telling her all along was true: she was still sexy. She was still desirable. And Trey knew it, too. And there was suddenly an unfamiliar fluttering in my stomach and for a moment I thought it was jealousy.
“So,” Trinh said abruptly, starting one of her sentences that come out of nowhere and disappear just as fast. I waited as she drained her cosmopolitan before gesturing toward Elisa and Trey with her emptied glass. “What do you think?” I looked back at Elisa, watched her smiling up at Trey, her arms slung around his neck, causing her dress to rise on her hips. Trinh stabbed her cigarette into the glass ashtray on the table, the butt rimmed with her maroon lipstick, and before I realized it, she had slipped silently into Elisa’s vacant seat next to me. “Is he attractive? Do you like him?”
“All I want is to see her fuck him. Then I can get on with my life.”
“He’s only twenty-two,” Trinh said, almost whispering, as if trying to keep it a secret. “And he’s hung like a fucking horse .” The pink-haired girl had lit at the table behind us, and Trinh turned to show the girl her empty glass, and I took a good look at Trinh for the first time since I’d arrived. She was Vietnamese, I finally decided, pretty and quite young, even more so than I had originally thought. Her hand was on my leg and I looked down at it and beyond to her crossed legs, long and bronze, naked almost to her waist, her tiny black skirt stretched across her lap, and she tugged at it once to let me know she knew I was looking. Then she said, “Are you sure you want to go through with this?”
I looked at Trinh and for a moment I was tempted to tell her everything. For a moment I wanted to tell her how Elisa and I used to be when we were first married, when we couldn’t get enough of each other, before we became distracted by our careers, our schedules, our money. I wanted to tell her how mortgages, a kid, and fourteen years had all conspired to somehow, inexplicably, turn us into old married people . But only for a moment.
Before I had to give Trinh an answer the drink girl came back and dropped off Trinh’s cosmopolitan as well as another blue drink for Elisa and two more beers. I looked again for Elisa, and for a moment couldn’t find her, then she and Trey suddenly appeared at the table and sat in the two seats across from Trinh and me. Elisa smiled at me and I could see her chest rising, her skin glistening with sweat. They began their fresh drinks in unison.
“You two look good together,” Trinh said to them, and then to me, “Didn’t they?” She was right, but I couldn’t answer before she said to Trey, “He likes to watch.”
“Really?” Trey said, almost laughing.
“What about you, Trey?” Trinh went on. “You like watching?”
“I like doing .”
“Sounds like you two are perfect for each other,” Trinh laughed, pointing at me with her glass and at Trey with her finger. Trey suddenly stood and announced to the table (and anyone else within earshot) that he had to take a piss, then disappeared into the darkness as Elisa watched.
When he was out of sight, Elisa turned to me and said, simply, “Well?”
And then Trinh: “What are you afraid of?”
It was a challenge, not a question. I understood this, but I had an answer nonetheless. More than anything, I was afraid of
“So,” Trinh said abruptly, starting one of her sentences that come out of nowhere and disappear just as fast. I waited as she drained her cosmopolitan before gesturing toward Elisa and Trey with her emptied glass. “What do you think?” I looked back at Elisa, watched her smiling up at Trey, her arms slung around his neck, causing her dress to rise on her hips. Trinh stabbed her cigarette into the glass ashtray on the table, the butt rimmed with her maroon lipstick, and before I realized it, she had slipped silently into Elisa’s vacant seat next to me. “Is he attractive? Do you like him?”
“All I want is to see her fuck him. Then I can get on with my life.”
“He’s only twenty-two,” Trinh said, almost whispering, as if trying to keep it a secret. “And he’s hung like a fucking horse .” The pink-haired girl had lit at the table behind us, and Trinh turned to show the girl her empty glass, and I took a good look at Trinh for the first time since I’d arrived. She was Vietnamese, I finally decided, pretty and quite young, even more so than I had originally thought. Her hand was on my leg and I looked down at it and beyond to her crossed legs, long and bronze, naked almost to her waist, her tiny black skirt stretched across her lap, and she tugged at it once to let me know she knew I was looking. Then she said, “Are you sure you want to go through with this?”
I looked at Trinh and for a moment I was tempted to tell her everything. For a moment I wanted to tell her how Elisa and I used to be when we were first married, when we couldn’t get enough of each other, before we became distracted by our careers, our schedules, our money. I wanted to tell her how mortgages, a kid, and fourteen years had all conspired to somehow, inexplicably, turn us into old married people . But only for a moment.
Before I had to give Trinh an answer the drink girl came back and dropped off Trinh’s cosmopolitan as well as another blue drink for Elisa and two more beers. I looked again for Elisa, and for a moment couldn’t find her, then she and Trey suddenly appeared at the table and sat in the two seats across from Trinh and me. Elisa smiled at me and I could see her chest rising, her skin glistening with sweat. They began their fresh drinks in unison.
“You two look good together,” Trinh said to them, and then to me, “Didn’t they?” She was right, but I couldn’t answer before she said to Trey, “He likes to watch.”
“Really?” Trey said, almost laughing.
“What about you, Trey?” Trinh went on. “You like watching?”
“I like doing .”
“Sounds like you two are perfect for each other,” Trinh laughed, pointing at me with her glass and at Trey with her finger. Trey suddenly stood and announced to the table (and anyone else within earshot) that he had to take a piss, then disappeared into the darkness as Elisa watched.
When he was out of sight, Elisa turned to me and said, simply, “Well?”
And then Trinh: “What are you afraid of?”
It was a challenge, not a question. I understood this, but I had an answer nonetheless. More than anything, I was afraid of
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