but it had shifted the focus of the guests away from the day’s VIP and onto a frantic search for his younger brother. He’d been found playing quietly in the summerhouse – a location that had been scoured twice over.
Leo had suspected that Matty had simply snuck over the back wall of the garden and hidden there, ignoring the sound of his own name until the search had shifted to the front of the house. He’d then slipped back and stole into position, priming his look of baffled amusement for the relieved search party to discover him. At this stage the short winter afternoon had ebbed and it was time for the other guests to go home.
Even though the periods of his absence had gotlonger, Matty always turned up. It was something that it seemed only Leo was wise to and he’d watched his parents, friends and Matty’s potential girlfriends scurrying around in panic just moments after their attention had been focused a little too much in Leo’s direction. How can somebody suddenly go missing? Indeed. Quite an enigma was Matty.
People didn’t seem to question his absence as much when their parents fell ill, however. They’d been difficult times and Leo had spent them alone but there didn’t seem to have been any great mystery about Matty’s vanishing act then. Their mother had died of abdominal cancer in ’95 and their father had quickly followed with liver cirrhosis the following year. Matty materialised in time for the funerals and everyone seemed as relieved to have him back as they had when they opened the summerhouse door. Eventual presence was the relief he gave to people. It was his gift.
Matty’s last protracted absence had been the year of Leo’s wedding. Leo hadn’t wanted him as best man but, in the absence of an emigrated friend and against his better judgement, he had approached him to offer the role. Matty had seemed shocked to have been asked but accepted. Leo even thought that perhaps being given such a pivotal role would insure against the inevitable. It didn’t, although Matty didn’t disappear for the entire wedding day – just for the seven months leading up to it. It was his longest absence and for a while weddingplans had taken a back seat while Leo tried to locate him.
Matty appeared a day or so before and was actually present by the afternoon. He turned up customarily late for the civil ceremony but didn’t actually vanish again until a few days later. On this occasion it was only a couple of weeks. Long enough, though, for Leo to spend his short married life again semi-concerned for his younger brother’s safety. Then Laura vanished and, it seemed, stole Matty’s thunder. He had reappeared after seeing her face on the news and Carla and the twins had kept him present ever since.
Leo would never know if Laura’s disappearance had acted as an alarm call for Matty to settle down or an opportunity to have something his brother suddenly didn’t: Leo loses wife and the prospect of having the family they had both planned for. At the same time Matty gets wife and two gorgeous children and is suddenly living in domestic nirvana. No, Matty had always sought attention but it had always been by removing himself rather than rubbing Leo’s nose in anything. Leo suspected that it was his own suspended circumstances that made him so resentful.
He knew it wasn’t a healthy train of thought but he just couldn’t shake the notion that all the family-man business and brotherly concern was an act, with Matty performing in a way he only thought was expected. There was an emptiness in Matty and Leo sometimeswondered if only he saw it. Amongst the tight curls and awkwardness, a huge chunk of something was missing and it seemed, from a very young age, Matty could only fill it by taking from his brother.
* * *
Ever heard of a Doctor Mutatkar?
Should I have?
He called me last night. Said he knew where Laura was. Was meant to meet me today but didn’t show up.
I have a lot of devotees in the
Leo had suspected that Matty had simply snuck over the back wall of the garden and hidden there, ignoring the sound of his own name until the search had shifted to the front of the house. He’d then slipped back and stole into position, priming his look of baffled amusement for the relieved search party to discover him. At this stage the short winter afternoon had ebbed and it was time for the other guests to go home.
Even though the periods of his absence had gotlonger, Matty always turned up. It was something that it seemed only Leo was wise to and he’d watched his parents, friends and Matty’s potential girlfriends scurrying around in panic just moments after their attention had been focused a little too much in Leo’s direction. How can somebody suddenly go missing? Indeed. Quite an enigma was Matty.
People didn’t seem to question his absence as much when their parents fell ill, however. They’d been difficult times and Leo had spent them alone but there didn’t seem to have been any great mystery about Matty’s vanishing act then. Their mother had died of abdominal cancer in ’95 and their father had quickly followed with liver cirrhosis the following year. Matty materialised in time for the funerals and everyone seemed as relieved to have him back as they had when they opened the summerhouse door. Eventual presence was the relief he gave to people. It was his gift.
Matty’s last protracted absence had been the year of Leo’s wedding. Leo hadn’t wanted him as best man but, in the absence of an emigrated friend and against his better judgement, he had approached him to offer the role. Matty had seemed shocked to have been asked but accepted. Leo even thought that perhaps being given such a pivotal role would insure against the inevitable. It didn’t, although Matty didn’t disappear for the entire wedding day – just for the seven months leading up to it. It was his longest absence and for a while weddingplans had taken a back seat while Leo tried to locate him.
Matty appeared a day or so before and was actually present by the afternoon. He turned up customarily late for the civil ceremony but didn’t actually vanish again until a few days later. On this occasion it was only a couple of weeks. Long enough, though, for Leo to spend his short married life again semi-concerned for his younger brother’s safety. Then Laura vanished and, it seemed, stole Matty’s thunder. He had reappeared after seeing her face on the news and Carla and the twins had kept him present ever since.
Leo would never know if Laura’s disappearance had acted as an alarm call for Matty to settle down or an opportunity to have something his brother suddenly didn’t: Leo loses wife and the prospect of having the family they had both planned for. At the same time Matty gets wife and two gorgeous children and is suddenly living in domestic nirvana. No, Matty had always sought attention but it had always been by removing himself rather than rubbing Leo’s nose in anything. Leo suspected that it was his own suspended circumstances that made him so resentful.
He knew it wasn’t a healthy train of thought but he just couldn’t shake the notion that all the family-man business and brotherly concern was an act, with Matty performing in a way he only thought was expected. There was an emptiness in Matty and Leo sometimeswondered if only he saw it. Amongst the tight curls and awkwardness, a huge chunk of something was missing and it seemed, from a very young age, Matty could only fill it by taking from his brother.
* * *
Ever heard of a Doctor Mutatkar?
Should I have?
He called me last night. Said he knew where Laura was. Was meant to meet me today but didn’t show up.
I have a lot of devotees in the
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