one of my primary functions."
"I just hope Threepio doesn’t turn out to be right this time," Han said. He then pulled himself up from the ventilation shaft two floors above the private chambers that were reserved for the grand moffs. "This could turn out to be like looking for a microchip lost in a field of zoochberries."
"Don’t worry, Han, this is going to be simple," the Human Replica Droid explained. "When Fandar and Fugo designed me, they installed a homing mechanism so that I can find Leia anywhere. Even now, I can detect the vibrations of her biorhythm. We’ll find her. Just keep your finger on the trigger of your blaster and follow me." The Moffship was now hovering directly above the Great Pit of Carkoon. Looking through the armored viewport, Grand Moff Muzzer pointed out to Grand Moff Thistleborn the gigantic mouth in the sand below them.
Ten stormtroopers surrounded Zorba in the viewing area, keeping the Hutt under guard. They were dressed in sandtrooper uniforms, ready in case Trioculus required them to set foot on Tatooine. Each stormtrooper wore an eighteen-piece antiblaster cocoon shell with a heat-reflective coating, a helmet with breathing filters, and a utility belt that had a food-and-water pack.
Thrusting out his chest confidently and ceremoniously, Trioculus led Princess Leia to see Zorba. Once again the Hutt was hoisted up by his wrists, this time dangling in the air directly above the viewport window.
"Curse your parents and grandparents for ten generations!" Zorba hissed. Trioculus ignored the Hutt. He pointed through the viewport in the floor. Zorba’s yellow, reptilian eyes glanced down to see where the Imperial ruler was directing his attention.
"That’s where you wanted to send Leia," Trioculus snapped. "But now it’s you who shall be executed instead. Go to your death, Zorba-and die like the slug you are!" Trioculus touched a red button on the wall. The viewport window in the floor began opening wide, like an immense porthole, as Trioculus did his best to imitate Zorba’s famous laugh.
"Ah-haha-haaaa!"
Trioculus suddenly released the chain that was holding Zorba over the hole, letting the old Hutt plunge to the scorching sands of Tatooine down below. "Who’s laughing now, Zorba?" Trioculus called after him.
Everyone on board the Moffship watched as the Hutt struck the ground just below the upper rim of the pit. Zorba rolled and tumbled downward, and the Mouth of Sarlacc opened wide to greet him.
The sound of the wind was too strong for anyone to hear well. However, standing near the viewport of the Moffship, Grand Moff Hissa thought he heard Zorba’s screaming moan just as the tentaclelike tongue of the Sarlacc wrapped around Zorba, yanking the Hutt into its immense mouth.
The mouth sucked Zorba down past its sharp teeth and belched. Then it closed, trapping Zorba inside its stomach. There, acids would digest the old Hutt for the next one thousand years.
All the while, Trioculus fixed his three eyes on Princess Leia, rather than on the Mouth of Sarlacc and Zorba. Trioculus saw Leia sigh with relief, perhaps even smile, as he had predicted. Or was it just a grimace? He couldn’t be certain.
Then Leia closed her eyes and glanced away.
"This day has brought me three victories, Princess," Trioculus declared. "First, I was freed from the carbonite. Then Zorba paid for the injustice he did to me-and to you. And lastly, I have taught you to be grateful to me."
"Grateful to you?" Leia exclaimed. "Guess again. I’ll be grateful to the Alliance when they assassinate you, Trioculus."
"I know you don’t mean that, Leia," he replied. "I destroyed Zorba and you smiled. I saw you."
"Did you now? I sincerely doubt it. I have nothing to smile about as long as I’m prisoner on this Moffship."
"The Dark Side is strong in you, Leia!" Trioculus continued. "It has control of you now; I’m certain of it. You shall marry me, and together we shall celebrate Zorba’s death!"
"Dream on,
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