since youâre offering, Iâll have aââ
He leaned over the bar to get the barmaidâs attention, cutting Nell off.
âSheâll have a bathtub gin with two wedges of lemon and a splash ofââ
âElderflower tonic,â snarled Nell. âGood evening, Oliver.â
CHAPTER 8
Y ou are twelve, and you cannot believe Oliver Kelly is still coming here every week. It is bad enough that you have to take Saturday classes without having to take them with him . And he still looks around seven. You didnât mind him when he was seven and you were seven, but that was long ago; that was when you didnât have to see him every single weekend. You arenât seven anymore. You are twelve. It is bad enough that you are twelve.
Only half an hour left; then heâll go home. Your eyes are on the clock, and youâre convinced itâs impossible for a clock to move this slowly. Youâd really like not to be sitting beside Oliver Kelly, who apparently has just discovered cologne. Discovering it would be fine; but youâre fairly sure heâs also been bathing in it, and even your welding mask wonât disguise the stench.
You shift uncomfortably, leaning away from Oliver a little more, almost at such an angle now that you might fall off your chair. You donât care if you fall off your chair. You just donât want to sit next to him.
The clockâs second hand moves once. You scowl. Your goggles are starting to dig into your face. Another second.
Your father makes very intense eye contact with Oliver when heâs instructing. He laughs at Oliverâs weak jokes. This is good because it means that Oliverâs gaze never floats over to you (your neckline, mostly, and youâre never sure if itâs your scar heâs trying to see through your scarf or if itâs your breasts, and either way you hate it). The whole thing makes you want to overturn the entire kitchen table and all the tools that lie out on it, wreck the composition of the skeleton key or whatever it is youâre practicing this week. Metal casting and magnets and filigree for detail. Itâs pointless anyway. Youâre ready to make things move, and you keep telling him ; but heâs dawdling on easier projects because of Oliver bloody Kelly.
You like the tiny blowtorch, though, the raw blue flame. You like the whispery roar it makes. You like the smell of the molten iron as it casts and cools; you like carving away at it with raw heat. You like the shape of the keyâs teeth, hungry for locks, confidentthat it can open anything, get in anywhere. You like its hidden magnets, how it can pull secrets apart.
You like learning. You like building. You just donât like Oliver.
You donât like watching how slowly and clumsily he puts things together; you donât like his earnest questions, his shaky requests to be shown everything twice or three times. You donât like how he keeps dropping his tools and how they clang onto the floor. You donât like how heâs here.
You turn the key over and over; you canât do anything else to it. It looks exactly as the blueprints intended. You pop your goggles up onto your head and take off your face mask. Oliver shoots you a jealous look; heâll be at least five more minutes to get the last corner done. You cup your face in your hands. âDa, Iâm done,â you offer sweetly, pushing smugness down.
Your father waves you off and continues to hover around Oliver. âAll right, Nell, calm down just a moment.â
Calm . . . down?
You seethe. Why should you even calm down? Youâve done exactly what you were told, no questions asked, got everything right the first time, and are done twenty-four minutes before youâre meant to be. You resist the urge to rap your fingers against the table, andyour ticking escalates in that very specific way it does when youâre upset. Another furious minute drags
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