what I prepare. Agreed?” He leaned toward her over the table darkly, and then smiled unflinchingly.
The couple ate heartily, the energy they had spent through the day having built healthy appetites in both of them. Their conversation was light, Emma afraid she might fall apart again, and Roland comfortable in a clean home with a friend at his supper table. He stopped after his last bite and leaned back in his chair.
“This is very remarkable, Emma. I must say. You have transformed this house. I don’t believe it has looked like this ever, even when I first built it.”
“Why did you build it?” Emma enjoyed the last morsels of her meal. “It’s so cozy. Did you imagine a family here?”
She watched his expression cloud over, but he met her eyes honestly.
“I did. I built it while Elgerson was working on his estate. He was engaged to his first wife then. I thought he had a dream all laid out. I was wrong about that.” He looked around the room, recalling all of the plans he had made as he cut and placed each board.
“Then Rebecca came and set everything that was wrong right for him. Timothy Elgerson is an amazing man. I guess I wanted to be a bit amazing as well. I wasn’t born to what he had, but I do alright. I thought I’d build this place and it would be good for a start. When the property is cleared there’s a garden out back and the water is good.
“After the accident when I found out…” He stopped short.
Emma waited calmly for him to finish.
“They told me I might not…” He stopped again. “After I got hurt I just lost my ambition, I guess.” He rose from the table and turned from her.
“You’re young, Roland. You may have that family yet.” She tried to sound reassuring. She gathered the plates and set the dishes in the big sink.
“Thank you for staying.” Emma turned to find the man close behind her, an odd look on his face. “Do you use everyone’s name the same as mine?” he asked, his voice hoarse.
“No,” she considered it for a moment. “Your name is different. It’s nice. I like to say it. Roland,” she said softly.
He stood facing her and she dared not move. She thought for a moment he might kiss her and she was terrified and thrilled. He reached and twisted his finger in a tendril of her hair, studying it closely. She saw his jaw tighten and he gritted his teeth, but he did not move from her and he did not move towards her. Emma froze in place, watching him struggle with some inner demon, before he turned away abruptly.
“It’s beginning to get dark. I’ll give you a ride home.”
Emma sat in the buggy afraid to utter a word for the entire ride back to the estate.
As she climbed out she thanked him softly.
“I’ll come back in the morning.” She watched his face closely.
“That would be good,” he replied and shook out the reins.
She watched him turn in the road and then walked up the front steps.
“Is everything okay?” Rebecca walked to her cousin and touched her face.
“Fine,” Emma smiled.
“Your face is filthy,” Rebecca laughed.
“No!” Emma gasped. “Really?”
Both women giggled violently in the foyer mirror, Emma discovering that she was indeed quite filthy, as Timothy wandered out from the study.
Emma faced the day, freshly scrubbed and wearing a faded, but clean frock. She appeared in the family dining room moments before any of the household and was pleased with her promptness and hopeful for the new day.
“Good morning,” Mark greeted her as Louisa ran and jumped into her arms. She lifted the child onto her lap and wrapped her finger with one of the child’s fat curls.
“You headed back to
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