Read Online Soul Music by Terry Pratchett - Free Book Online

in?”
    “In, yes. In bed. Snoring his head off.”
    “I thought they stayed up all night!”
    “Not this one. Cup of cocoa around nine, dead to the world at five past.”
    “I can’t just let myself into his house!”
    “Why not? You’ve come to see me. Anyway, I’m the brains of the outfit. He just wears the funny hat and does the hand waving.”
    Susan turned the key.
    It was warm inside. There was the usual wizardly paraphernalia—a forge, a bench with bottles and bundles strewn over it, a bookcase with books rammed in anyhow, a stuffed alligator hanging from the ceiling, some very big candles that were just lava streams of wax, and a raven on a skull.
    “They get it all out of a catalog,” said the raven. “Believe me. It all comes in a big box. You think candles get dribbly like that by themselves? That’s three days’ work for a skilled candle dribbler.”
    “You’re just making that up,” said Susan. “Anyway, you can’t just buy a skull.”
    “You know best I’m sure, being educated,” said the raven.
    “What were you trying to tell me last night?”
    “Tell you?” said the raven, with a guilty look on its beak.
    “All that dah-dah-dah-DAH stuff.”
    The raven scratched its head.
    “He said I wasn’t to tell you. I was just supposed to warn you about the horse. I got carried away. Turned up, has it?”
    “Yes!”
    “Ride it.”
    “I did. It can’t be real! Real horses know where the ground is.”
    “Miss, there’s no horse realer than that one.”
    “I know his name! I’ve ridden him before!”
    The raven sighed, or at least made a sort of whistling noise, which is as close to a sigh as a beak can get.
    “Ride the horse. He’s decided you’re the one.”
    “Where to?”
    “That’s for me not to know and you to find out.”
    “Just supposing I was stupid enough to do it…can you kind of hint about what will happen?”
    “Well…you’ve read books, I can see. Have you ever read any about children who go to magical faraway kingdoms and have adventures with goblins and so on?”
    “Yes, of course,” said Susan, grimly.
    “It’d probably be best if you thought along those lines,” said the raven.
    Susan picked up a bundle of herbs and played with them.
    “I saw someone outside who said she was the Tooth Fairy,” she said.
    “Nah, couldn’t’ve been the Tooth Fairy,” said the raven. “There’s at least three of them.”
    “There’s no such person. I mean…I didn’t know, I thought that’s just a…a story. Like the Sandman or the Hogfather.” *
    “Ah,” said the raven. “Changing our tone, yes? Not so much of the emphatic declarative, yes? A bit less of the ‘There’s no such thing’ and a bit more of the ‘I didn’t know,’ yes?”
    “Everyone knows—I mean, it’s not logical that there’s an old man in a beard who gives everyone sausages and chitterlings on Hogswatchnight, is it?”
    “I don’t know about logic. Never learned about logic,” said the raven. “Living on a skull ain’t exactly logical, but that’s what I do.”
    “And there can’t be a Sandman who goes around throwing sand in children’s eyes,” said Susan, but in tones of uncertainty. “You’d…never get enough sand in one bag.”
    “Could be. Could be.”
    “I’d better be going,” said Susan. “Miss Butts always checks the dorms on the stroke of midnight.”
    “How many dormitories are there?” said the raven.
    “About thirty, I think.”
    “You believe she checks them all at midnight and you don’t believe in the Hogfather?”
    “I’d better be going anyway,” said Susan. “Um. Thank you.”
    “Lock up behind you and chuck the key through the window,” said the raven.
    The room was silent after she’d gone, except for the crackle as coals settled in the furnace.
    Then the skull said: “Kids today, eh?”
    “I blame education,” said the raven.
    “A lot of knowledge is a dangerous thing,” said the skull. “A lot more dangerous than just a