that point because, as much as I’d enjoy it, Alexa would be devastated. I couldn’t do that to her.
Like salt poured on the wound came the unwelcome awareness that Kale and I were not so different. Rumor had it that he had stepped in to deal with the rebels on my behalf while I was away in Vegas. He had thwarted an assassination attempt on me, and he had only done it for Alexa. The same way I was now sparing him for her.
I asked myself, as I had so many times before, why did I bother? Why did I fight so hard for this woman? The answer was always the same. She was what made me more than a vampire, more than a creature of the night. She gave me purpose and meaning. Without her, I was nothing.
Before Shaz could grab my arm, I spun to fend him off. “Go home, pup. This is a bad time for you to be here.”
“Don’t start with me, Arys. I’m not the enemy. At least, not tonight.” He fell into step beside me.
“No, the enemy is me. I did this. I made her vampire, and I drove her into Sinclair’s bed.” I stopped suddenly and held my hands out. “Want to take a shot at me too? You might as well. You always want to.”
Shaz grinned but it lacked mirth. “Not always. Usually, but not always. You could’ve really taken things from bad to worse in there.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t. I do have some self-control, pup, regardless of what you may think. Although I’m about to go and lose that control now.” I cast an angry glance back at The Wicked Kiss. That name itself had been the bane of my existence long before I knew Alexa.
Suspicion curved Shaz’s lips into a stern frown. “Should I ask?”
“I’d rather you not. Is there somewhere else you can be? Neither of us should be here tonight.”
My expression remained neutral as did my tone. It was no concern of mine what Shaz did. Not really. And yet, it was. No way in hell was I leaving him to become a victim of The Wicked Kiss again.
“Yeah, actually I’m heading to Doghead.” He took a few tentative steps toward his car, unwilling to take his gaze off me, as if he didn’t think it was a good idea. “So, I’ll catch you later then. Call me if anything comes up.”
Alexa. That’s what he meant.
“Will do. Take it easy.”
I waited for him to get in his car and drive away. I hated to doubt him, but he was not going to fall back into the blood whore scene. Not on my watch.
Truth be told, the pup had grown on me over the last year. Sure he made me want to hit things in a way very few others did, but he had proven himself to be worthy of both respect and Alexa.
I knew damn well that if I had only lived a human life, I would never have lived in her lifetime, but Shaz still would have. Our twin flame union survived outside the natural law. It was meant to exist, but it came at a price, which ultimately meant that Shaz was the one she was meant to be with. Not me.
That’s what made everything so fucking complicated. She was mine, meant to be mine, and yet she was also his. I’d accepted it from the start. What choice did I have? Shaz was still coming around. And Alexa, well, she was understandably conflicted and more than likely ready to tell us all to fuck off.
Shaz was the only one though. The only man I could share her with. The only one I trusted to take care of her if something ever happened to me.
Alexa had recently gotten it into her head that she needed to distance herself from him. I did not agree. She was feeling guilty about things that were not within her control. It would pass.
When I was sure Shaz was long gone, I too left. No sense sticking around now. My encounter with Kale had gone exactly as planned. Unfortunately, it hadn’t left me feeling as good as I’d anticipated.
As I’d told the pup, I sought out a scenario in which I could abandon self-control and unleash the horrible need to feel something die. Less than an hour later, I had a grown man on his knees begging for his life.
Needing to punish someone in Kale’s
Like salt poured on the wound came the unwelcome awareness that Kale and I were not so different. Rumor had it that he had stepped in to deal with the rebels on my behalf while I was away in Vegas. He had thwarted an assassination attempt on me, and he had only done it for Alexa. The same way I was now sparing him for her.
I asked myself, as I had so many times before, why did I bother? Why did I fight so hard for this woman? The answer was always the same. She was what made me more than a vampire, more than a creature of the night. She gave me purpose and meaning. Without her, I was nothing.
Before Shaz could grab my arm, I spun to fend him off. “Go home, pup. This is a bad time for you to be here.”
“Don’t start with me, Arys. I’m not the enemy. At least, not tonight.” He fell into step beside me.
“No, the enemy is me. I did this. I made her vampire, and I drove her into Sinclair’s bed.” I stopped suddenly and held my hands out. “Want to take a shot at me too? You might as well. You always want to.”
Shaz grinned but it lacked mirth. “Not always. Usually, but not always. You could’ve really taken things from bad to worse in there.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t. I do have some self-control, pup, regardless of what you may think. Although I’m about to go and lose that control now.” I cast an angry glance back at The Wicked Kiss. That name itself had been the bane of my existence long before I knew Alexa.
Suspicion curved Shaz’s lips into a stern frown. “Should I ask?”
“I’d rather you not. Is there somewhere else you can be? Neither of us should be here tonight.”
My expression remained neutral as did my tone. It was no concern of mine what Shaz did. Not really. And yet, it was. No way in hell was I leaving him to become a victim of The Wicked Kiss again.
“Yeah, actually I’m heading to Doghead.” He took a few tentative steps toward his car, unwilling to take his gaze off me, as if he didn’t think it was a good idea. “So, I’ll catch you later then. Call me if anything comes up.”
Alexa. That’s what he meant.
“Will do. Take it easy.”
I waited for him to get in his car and drive away. I hated to doubt him, but he was not going to fall back into the blood whore scene. Not on my watch.
Truth be told, the pup had grown on me over the last year. Sure he made me want to hit things in a way very few others did, but he had proven himself to be worthy of both respect and Alexa.
I knew damn well that if I had only lived a human life, I would never have lived in her lifetime, but Shaz still would have. Our twin flame union survived outside the natural law. It was meant to exist, but it came at a price, which ultimately meant that Shaz was the one she was meant to be with. Not me.
That’s what made everything so fucking complicated. She was mine, meant to be mine, and yet she was also his. I’d accepted it from the start. What choice did I have? Shaz was still coming around. And Alexa, well, she was understandably conflicted and more than likely ready to tell us all to fuck off.
Shaz was the only one though. The only man I could share her with. The only one I trusted to take care of her if something ever happened to me.
Alexa had recently gotten it into her head that she needed to distance herself from him. I did not agree. She was feeling guilty about things that were not within her control. It would pass.
When I was sure Shaz was long gone, I too left. No sense sticking around now. My encounter with Kale had gone exactly as planned. Unfortunately, it hadn’t left me feeling as good as I’d anticipated.
As I’d told the pup, I sought out a scenario in which I could abandon self-control and unleash the horrible need to feel something die. Less than an hour later, I had a grown man on his knees begging for his life.
Needing to punish someone in Kale’s
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