Read Online Sliding On The Edge by C. Lee McKenzie - Free Book Online Page B

agree or disagree with this topic
statement? Support your position with one or two specific examples
from personal experience, events past or present, or from books you
have read. (Three paragraphs minimum. 30 minutes.)”
    Pathetic. Who thinks up these essay
questions anyway?
    I pull out my Casino Royale ballpoint
and write Shawna across the top of the paper. This is an
interesting dilemma– —di . . . lem . . .ma. I love that word. It
means something terrible, but it rolls off the tip of my tongue and
sounds delicious. Do I put down the truth, or do I give her what
she’d like to read?
    I look at the clock.
    I better decide or I’m not going to
get anything down.
     
    I disagree with the
proposition that it is easier to tell the truth than it is to tell
a lie. There are times when a lie works a lot better than the
truth. I come from Las Vegas, a town where lying is an art form, so
I have a lot of examples to support my position. In fact, I have so
many that three hundred paragraphs wouldn’t be enough space to
write them out.
    Let’s take a bar girl for
example. She wouldn’t make any tips if she told the drunk how
flat-out ugly he was. Instead, by saying he’s a handsome so and so,
giving him a small pat on his butt and a smile that tells him he’s
the only guy she’s looking at, the girl takes home enough dough to
cover her rent and her child care for the month.
    Sometimes it’s better to
lie than to hurt somebody with the truth. If a dorky guy asks a
girl out and she would rather drink rat poison than be seen in
public with him, I think she should tell him she’s got a date for
that night. That way he saves face and she’s off the hook. Imagine
a friend who is overweight asking for an “honest” opinion about how
she looks wearing her new, very tight pants. Talk about a
minefiled! If she looks fat and you tell her so, you can kiss that
friendship goodbye. There are tons of times like these when people
lie, and lying makes life better for the one being lied to and for
the person telling the lie, too.
     
    Okay, I have two paragraphs of
examples—that’s more than enough. But, no, English teachers have
this essay-trinity-thing they want. So, what can I use for the
third?
    I could write about me. I close my
eyes and think about the next paragraph. Something like,
     
    If I told the truth about
what my mom does for a living, I’d be in Juvie and she’d be in
jail. My mom’s a gambler and sometimes a pickpocket when she’s down
on her luck, so, as anyone can see, if I’d told the truth to the
police when they came to visit a few months ago, I wouldn’t be
sitting here now, trying to defend my preference for
lying.
     
    No. I don’t want to write that. Let’s
keep this essay impersonal.
     
    Think about the
politicians and how none of them would be elected if they told the
truth. “I’m going to raise taxes the first chance I get.” “I’m
declaring war as soon as I can make up an excuse.” Would these
truthful candidates win? I don’t think so.
    I reread the four
paragraphs.
    Not really good. I need a way more
interesting question to write about if I’m going to bend my brain
and be brilliant on paper. I lean back and twirl my pen. If I shake
it up, maybe some punchy idea will flow out in the ink. A quote,
maybe. That’s one thing I always surprise people with. They can
tell me something, and it’s in and out of my head in a snap, but
let me read it somewhere, and it sticks there like glue.
    So what quotes do I know about
lying?
     
    Even Mark Twain wrote in
one of his letters to a friend, “I would rather tell seven lies
than make one explanation.” Well, I agree with Mr. Twain. I know
people would rather hear something they like than something they
don’t. I know that sometimes the truth causes more damage than it
does good, and sometimes it’s more trouble to explain than to
lie .
     
    Ta da! The summary
conclusion, and it’s a wrap . I look up at
the clock. I still have ten minutes