past him. When he
didn't move, she said, "I have to check on Gloria."
"I
just did. She's asleep. I want to talk to you."
Panic
seized her. This was not a conversation she wanted to have.
"I'm
busy. Let's reschedule."
He raised his eyebrows. "Busy
doing what?"
"Stuff. Important stuff." She
groaned silently. Talk about pathetically lame.
She couldn't
handle him today. Not when she was still fighting the embarrassment
of their last encounter and she was feeling emotionally vulnerable
because of what was going on with Madeline.
Just thinking
about her sister drained the last of the fight out of her. Her
shoulders slumped and she stared at Reid.
"Fine. What do
you want to talk about?"
"You can't just give in
like that," he said. "It's not right."
"You're
complaining because I let you win? You might want to rethink your
priorities."
"Something's wrong," he said.
"What is it?"
She turned away. "Nothing."
"I
know enough about women to know that really means there's something
but I'm going to have to work to get at it." He grabbed her arm.
"Tell me."
She didn't plan to tell him anything.
That was the hell of her situation. There was no one to talk to.
Certainly not Madeline, who had enough to deal with herself, and not
their mother who was a pretty useless kind of person.
She
hated that she was tempted. Even more she hated that despite
everything, she was hyper-aware of his fingers on her arm. Even
through her sweater, she felt heat and need and a whole list of other
desires that would go seriously unfulfilled.
"Go away,"
she said, able to appreciate that she was starting to sound like
Gloria.
"Maybe I can help."
"Like you've
helped all those kids who wrote you?" she asked, twisting free
and glaring at him. "I don't think so. But, hey, if you're so
big on knowing, here's the thing. My sister's dying. Okay? Are you
happy now that you're well informed? She has a bad case of Hepatitis
C she got from a transfusion years ago. A liver transplant could save
her, but she has a rare blood type so the odds aren't good. So I'm
thinking you're not going to be much help at all unless you happen to
be AB negative and want to give up your liver to a really good
cause."
She started out of the kitchen, but before she'd
gone more than a few feet, she was swamped with feelings. Maybe Reid
was a jerk, but he'd never been jerky directly to her. She had no
right to lash out at him. In his own shallow way, he probably had been trying to help.
She glanced back at him, taking in the
stunned expression darkening his eyes.
"I'm sorry,"
she said. "I shouldn't have said that. The doctor didn't have
good news and that kind of pushed me over the edge."
Then
she shocked herself and probably him by bursting into tears.
Even
as the tears poured down her face, she struggled for control. She
didn't cry— not ever. It wasn't allowed. She was practical and
logical and take-charge. She didn't allow weakness in herself and she
didn't respect it in other people.
But she couldn't seem to
stop crying.
Suddenly Reid was there in front of her. He
pulled her close, wrapped his arms around her.
As she couldn't
seem to stop crying, she let herself lean on him for a few minutes.
She let herself be comforted and held.
He was tall and strong,
she thought as she held on to him. For once her thoughts where he was
concerned weren't about sex. She had the oddest sense that he could
be someone she could trust. Which was totally insane. He was as
stable as quicksand.
Still, being held felt really nice. She
gave in to weakness until the tears dried up, then she sniffed, took
a step back and wiped her face on her sleeve.
"Sorry,"
she said, staring at the hardwood floor. It was really shiny. Maybe
she should put new floors in her place.
"What happened at
the doctor's appointment?" he asked quietly.
She risked
looking at him and saw only sympathy in his eyes. She
shrugged.
"I've known since the diagnosis that it wasn't
going to be good. I mean, I'm a nurse. I can
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